Happiness is a Warm Gun?
Ugh.....why did i have to look at that....why do I still even look to see changes? I'm horrible horrible horrible and very retarded right now and realize just how stupid the thing that I am doing is because i don't even want to admit it here....I just know what i am writing about and don't want discuss in detail.
What's worse is being worried. Feeling worried when it's not like there is anything I can do to control the situation....its done it's over and I am forgotten....why can't I forget too? *sigh* i Do wish Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind actually exsisted.... i would do it in heart beat. Uhhhh i think I am actually going to be sick. I actually feel sick from looking and reading what i read. I actually feel nauseous enough to say I can't go to school tomorrow....uhhhh!!!!!!! Now i am just getting so frustrated... i just want to cry and I haven't done that in a while....why....why why why why why! Stupid stupid stupid! AH! Can someone just take me away for a bit...i know i just went to the beach but i just need someone to take my mind away...do something so I never have to think about shit again....so it doesn't seem as important to me anymore...*sigh* and now here comes me feeling pathetic....and i know i shouldn't but I do and i am writing about all this in hopes i can get it out but I know i am still going to bed feeling sick and worried because i don't know anything for sure....Dammit i really just want to cry right now but i don't want to be alone.... i wish I was at the lake with someone I can vent to....because i haven't been able to vent to anyone about this subject in a long time....but I just want to ....i know it is midnight but if I could and could have someone to go with right now i would go to the lake right now just so I could feel like maybe I could breathe....I gotta go....i really feel sick. This is one of the worst feelings ever.
What's worse is being worried. Feeling worried when it's not like there is anything I can do to control the situation....its done it's over and I am forgotten....why can't I forget too? *sigh* i Do wish Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind actually exsisted.... i would do it in heart beat. Uhhhh i think I am actually going to be sick. I actually feel sick from looking and reading what i read. I actually feel nauseous enough to say I can't go to school tomorrow....uhhhh!!!!!!! Now i am just getting so frustrated... i just want to cry and I haven't done that in a while....why....why why why why why! Stupid stupid stupid! AH! Can someone just take me away for a bit...i know i just went to the beach but i just need someone to take my mind away...do something so I never have to think about shit again....so it doesn't seem as important to me anymore...*sigh* and now here comes me feeling pathetic....and i know i shouldn't but I do and i am writing about all this in hopes i can get it out but I know i am still going to bed feeling sick and worried because i don't know anything for sure....Dammit i really just want to cry right now but i don't want to be alone.... i wish I was at the lake with someone I can vent to....because i haven't been able to vent to anyone about this subject in a long time....but I just want to ....i know it is midnight but if I could and could have someone to go with right now i would go to the lake right now just so I could feel like maybe I could breathe....I gotta go....i really feel sick. This is one of the worst feelings ever.