Title: From There to Here
Series: Part Two of Three
Author:
freakykat Beta:
forbiddenromanc - She is awesome!
Rating: G - R
Summary: Second set of 10 drabbles from Luke's POV. His life was never easy...
Spoilers: Starts at with the end of the current storyline and goes on. Future fic.
Disclaimer: I don't own them, sadly. They belong to P&G, ATWT, Goutman, JP and their respective actors.
A/N: Note: This is in response to a meme I saw floating around. The gist of it was: put your iTunes on shuffle, and write a drabble based on each of the first ten songs that play. Don’t linger when the song is over, this is an exercise. I wrote my ten drabbles in a cohesive vien. Feedback would be lovely and appreciated but not required. :)
Part One: From If to When From There to Here
1.
(Breathe Me - Sia )
When he left Noah, it had felt like every part of Luke screamed in agony against it. He questioned the decision every minute up until he told Noah. The moment he did, looking into blue eyes that held his, it was obvious that it was the only possible solution. Because standing in front of the man he loved had left him feeling alone and lost.
Luke believed love was supposed to make you whole. Complete what was missing. He knew that had stopped being them a long time ago. So he held Noah’s hand and let the words he needed to say finally be heard.
2.
(Brand New Colony - Postal Service )
Luke wondered where things had gone wrong. Ameera, of course. She had become the focal point of his relationship with Noah. Somewhere along the way of being noble, he’d lost sight of Noah. And worse yet, Luke had lost sight of himself.
He wanted to be free. To touch Noah….to kiss Noah….without looking around every corner or behind every bush.
He wanted to do all those things they’d whispered to each other while huddled under Noah’s blanket in the parlor.
He wanted to laugh again. Something he hadn’t done in a long time.
He wanted to be happy.
He wanted.
3.
(Let it Be - Carol Woods and Timothy T. Mitchum )
When Luke sees Noah for the first time after their break up, it takes everything in him not to reach out and hug him. There’s a shadow on his face that had never been there before. He wonders briefly, as they stare at each other in the harsh hospital lighting, if something was wrong. Something he didn’t know about. He would casually ask Casey how Noah was doing whenever they ran into each other. The answer was always the same.
“He’s working on it”
That was bullshit.
Instinct made him want to help Noah.
Self-preservation kept him away.
4.
(This Mess We’re In - Placebo feat. PJ Harvey)
New York City.
Luke breathed in the energy around him. The sunrise over the river, the traffic, the people…it called to him. In the two days it took to interview at Columbia, he spent every spare moment walking through the city. Learning his way.
Just in case.
He didn’t let himself think of Noah when he had asked his Grandmother Lucinda about the possibility of New York. She had leaned her head to one side, stared at him for a long moment, and then offered him any help she could give.
Luke wanted this. The anonymity that came with a big city. Here he wouldn’t run into anyone that knew who he was. Here no one cared. Here no one disappointed.
New York would be peace.
5.
(This Is How It Feels -- The Veronicas)
It takes all of Holden’s self-restraint not to tell his son to keep fighting. He can tell Luke is waiting for that. Or for Holden to try to tell him that this will pass. That though it hurts now, his heart will heal.
The truth was it might never.
Noah was Luke’s first love. And Holden knew better than most that your first love could be your only love…
He also knew what it felt like to see that love drift away…he knew what it was to see it but be unable to touch it. So, for both Luke and Noah’s sake, Holden simply hugged his son, and told him he was proud.
Because Holden knew.
6.
(No One -- Alicia Keys)
Luke would never have guessed how much he would miss the little things. He knew he would miss touching Noah, trailing fingers over warm skin. Kissing soft lips, breathing in the little noises he coaxed out of him. He missed Noah’s voice early in the morning…rough and warm. Hair sticking up all over, crooked sleepy smile that made him want to fuck him right on the kitchen table. None of that was unexpected.
It was Ethan’s sad face when his grandmother gave him oatmeal and didn’t do the funny voices Noah would do, that took him by surprise. Or the song that Natalie would hum as she tied her shoes which he knew was one Noah taught her. Or Faith reading a comic book he knew Noah loved. Or the stupid notes he’d leave Luke on the table, the bathroom mirror, in his backpack….
In the end, it was the little things that made him cry.
7.
(Let Go -- Frou Frou)
“Do you not love Noah anymore?”
Luke glanced up across the table at Faith and blinked her way. Twice. “I never said that.” He watched her hair fall down over her face as she processed his answer. His brow furrowed and he wondered where that question had come from. Before he could ask her, she spoke again.
“Then are you going to get back with him?”
Luke sighed, that answer being more than just a bit complicated. “It’s not that easy, Faith.”
She nodded at him. “Of course not. Nothing worth anything is.” Biting her lip, she met his eyes and the next words out of her mouth made him freeze. “Sometimes you forget what’s worth fighting for until it’s too late.” Gathering her books, she stepped into the parlor as Luke watched her go.
8.
(I Want To Hold Your Hand - T.V Carpio)
Dating became a chore for him.
It had started well enough with Roth. It had been fun and easy. They’d shared a few laughs, some movies, a couple concerts. He was nice. Luke wanted nice and easy and fun. When he’d kissed him for the first time, he’d been afraid of what he might feel. But it had been…nice. Like everything else with Roth. He hadn’t felt a rush of heat, or the prickle of need on his skin but he couldn’t expect that every time. It was all good…
Until Roth slipped his hand into Luke’s and their fingers had fumbled, not quite meshing. The hold too tight, too clammy. Memories of warmth and a perfect fit filtered across Luke’s mind and he cursed Noah to hell for making him hate anyone else’s hands.
9.
(These Dreams - Heart)
Sometimes Luke hated to get out of bed in the morning. In that place between waking up and sleep, Noah would be at his side, trailing warm fingers under Luke’s shirt, licking a stripe of hot wetness on his throat. He’d feel breath and heat at his back. Hands in his hair, tugging a little too hard, whispering words that shivered down Luke’s spine. If they had simply been dreams…hallucinations of his mind, it wouldn’t have been so hard.
But those memories of them snuck in during his sleep, loose to be free from the restraint of Luke’s refusal to acknowledge them. In those moments his heart grieved when Luke couldn’t.
10.
(Change of Heart - Cyndi Lauper)
He bent at the waist, taking deep breaths against the ache, the fear that rattled through his bones and in his blood. He confronted Casey about Noah outside of Al‘s and in the ensuing fight that broke out Casey spilled all. And it was like a black hole opened up and swallowed Luke whole. His anger had rushed out in a spit of words and gestures. He didn’t believe it. His Noah was healthy, and if not happy, at least …still managing.
Casey’s eyes sharpened, dark blue as he spoke. “At least you can’t hurt him when he’s gone.”
Luke punched him hard, grabbed his shoulder bag and headed to the cottage. To hell with what might have happened. Noah needed someone. That someone was him. They had made a promise once to be there when it mattered most. Luke meant to keep it.
- Part Three -
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I am currently working on Indebted and a surprise for Plum (and in extension all of you!)