I wrote this for a friend of mine who complained about surveys
Tired of the same old survey questions? I did my best on this one, just for you.
1. Have you spotted any UFO's lately?
2. Would you eat Taco Bell with me?
3. What do you think of The Rabbits?
4. Have you ever consorted with a Communist duck?
5. Did you see the way the orange slayed the rake?
6. How many teeth do you have?
7. Would you recognize my fingerprints if you saw them?
8. Are you *SURE* you know what "fuschia" looks like?
9. Do you know what "pompitous" means?
10. How many children would you like to have?
11. How many pieces of candy would it take to get you into a stranger's car?
12. Have you ever killed anyone?
13. Has anyone in your extended family been convicted of a crime in the last year?
14. Do you like to move furniture?
15. Have you ever been commited?
16. On average, how many books have you read since you were 10 years old?
17. Did you light the fire?
18. Do you take everything everyone says too literally?
19. If you came to my house, would you kick my cat?
20. Why do people say, "I was bored, what do you want?!" when they are too embarrassed to admit that they did something? Why can't they just own their actions and desires and say, "I wasted my time on this thing because I felt like doing it?" or "What do you mean you don't like it? I thought it was cool" or "Maybe you'd call it an obsession, but I happen to think everyone needs a hobby" or any of a million other things?
21. Does it bother you as much as it bothers me when people use the same worn out trite expressions as everyone else, even when it isn't appropriate to the situation? Do you wish they would just shut the hell up if they can't either be honest or be original?
1. Have you spotted any UFO's lately?
2. Would you eat Taco Bell with me?
3. What do you think of The Rabbits?
4. Have you ever consorted with a Communist duck?
5. Did you see the way the orange slayed the rake?
6. How many teeth do you have?
7. Would you recognize my fingerprints if you saw them?
8. Are you *SURE* you know what "fuschia" looks like?
9. Do you know what "pompitous" means?
10. How many children would you like to have?
11. How many pieces of candy would it take to get you into a stranger's car?
12. Have you ever killed anyone?
13. Has anyone in your extended family been convicted of a crime in the last year?
14. Do you like to move furniture?
15. Have you ever been commited?
16. On average, how many books have you read since you were 10 years old?
17. Did you light the fire?
18. Do you take everything everyone says too literally?
19. If you came to my house, would you kick my cat?
20. Why do people say, "I was bored, what do you want?!" when they are too embarrassed to admit that they did something? Why can't they just own their actions and desires and say, "I wasted my time on this thing because I felt like doing it?" or "What do you mean you don't like it? I thought it was cool" or "Maybe you'd call it an obsession, but I happen to think everyone needs a hobby" or any of a million other things?
21. Does it bother you as much as it bothers me when people use the same worn out trite expressions as everyone else, even when it isn't appropriate to the situation? Do you wish they would just shut the hell up if they can't either be honest or be original?