What an idiot I am!
Saturday night its Doug, me, Nicole, Aanderued, Seth, Kurt, David, and for a brief moment this guy Brandon. I say brief moment because he stole some amazing yellow astronaughts that had glitter in them. They took us to the stars. Anyways we were drinking at first. And Doug was past out so Nicole and me woke his bitch ass up. Well I wasn't amused so I just layed on the floor like I always do when that happens. Any ways Doug is like wake up Nikki wake up! And straddles me and pins me down. He even grabbed my tit. That was a first. And we wrestled some and of course I lost because he was on top. Ha. Any ways we went on a run for the yellow astronaughts.
By the time we got back Nicole was rollin her ass off, and Doug had to carry her up the stairs. That was hillarious. Well she was just grabbing him and rubbing him and touching him and all that shit. Well he joined in and was rubbing her head and belly and straddling her on the floor and I go you need to kiss that poor girl. He's all I will and did. I didn't think that it would bother me too much. Well it did. Well then I was laying on the floor again and she had passed out so he looks down at me and points at the couch for me to sit by him. I shook my head no, and pointed next to me. He said uh ah, no here. I go no, so he gives me a puppy dog face with lip and everything. I say that won't work on me. So he gave up. Well then,
He got down and laid on the floor with me. And starts rubbing my head. I go don't do that I'm not a dog. He laughed and started rubbing my temples. I said I'm not frisky just don't touch me. Hes like not frisky, and you're on ........, impossible! I said nope! I'm not. He replies with fine then ass! The him me nicole and seth go and hide behind the couch. Well Seth instantly passed out and there goes nicole and doug gropeing each other. So I go I'm going for a walk.
So I go to the couch where we were directly behind. And start talking to David and Aanderued. Well then I'm like oops better go for a walk so he doesn't know it's getting to me. So I go downstairs and right back up. It twas cold. Then I went and sat back down next to Aanderued. Then Doug pops his head up and is like why you up here whats wrong. I said I think you know. He goes, You want me to stop touching her? I said no I dont care. Mistake number 2 with him and her. Then I go I know you like her why won't you admit it. Him, "because I don't" me, "yes you do" him"i really dont' me whatever. Mistake three. Then he comes and sits next to me and is all nuzzling up against me and what not, and so i just talked to aanderued. I was completely totally and udderly discusted in him for touching her,kissing her, and just uh! So thats mistake four i guess. And all night he kept giving me looks like I'm sorry and just sincere looks at me. It was odd and hard for me. So I stopped talking and looking at him. I think he may like me. I don't know. This is hard!
Now I'm all depressed and I think I'm going to call him and tell him that I'm sorry for acting like I did. And explain to him that it just wierded me out that he was showing me attention, especially now that I don't like him anymore.
I mean I do like him, but I don't want to undignify myself by telling him the truth. Too much pride. But its the only option that sounded good to me. I guess. It's killing me too! Man this sucks ass. And man, I'm about to be 18 soon enough it'll be twenty then what?! That scares me. I might be going back to Florida next year. I don't know what I'm going to do and that depresses me as well. I don't know what I shall do. I guess thats what my Therapist is for. I guess I have something to talk about. Geez, this sucks...
By the time we got back Nicole was rollin her ass off, and Doug had to carry her up the stairs. That was hillarious. Well she was just grabbing him and rubbing him and touching him and all that shit. Well he joined in and was rubbing her head and belly and straddling her on the floor and I go you need to kiss that poor girl. He's all I will and did. I didn't think that it would bother me too much. Well it did. Well then I was laying on the floor again and she had passed out so he looks down at me and points at the couch for me to sit by him. I shook my head no, and pointed next to me. He said uh ah, no here. I go no, so he gives me a puppy dog face with lip and everything. I say that won't work on me. So he gave up. Well then,
He got down and laid on the floor with me. And starts rubbing my head. I go don't do that I'm not a dog. He laughed and started rubbing my temples. I said I'm not frisky just don't touch me. Hes like not frisky, and you're on ........, impossible! I said nope! I'm not. He replies with fine then ass! The him me nicole and seth go and hide behind the couch. Well Seth instantly passed out and there goes nicole and doug gropeing each other. So I go I'm going for a walk.
So I go to the couch where we were directly behind. And start talking to David and Aanderued. Well then I'm like oops better go for a walk so he doesn't know it's getting to me. So I go downstairs and right back up. It twas cold. Then I went and sat back down next to Aanderued. Then Doug pops his head up and is like why you up here whats wrong. I said I think you know. He goes, You want me to stop touching her? I said no I dont care. Mistake number 2 with him and her. Then I go I know you like her why won't you admit it. Him, "because I don't" me, "yes you do" him"i really dont' me whatever. Mistake three. Then he comes and sits next to me and is all nuzzling up against me and what not, and so i just talked to aanderued. I was completely totally and udderly discusted in him for touching her,kissing her, and just uh! So thats mistake four i guess. And all night he kept giving me looks like I'm sorry and just sincere looks at me. It was odd and hard for me. So I stopped talking and looking at him. I think he may like me. I don't know. This is hard!
Now I'm all depressed and I think I'm going to call him and tell him that I'm sorry for acting like I did. And explain to him that it just wierded me out that he was showing me attention, especially now that I don't like him anymore.
I mean I do like him, but I don't want to undignify myself by telling him the truth. Too much pride. But its the only option that sounded good to me. I guess. It's killing me too! Man this sucks ass. And man, I'm about to be 18 soon enough it'll be twenty then what?! That scares me. I might be going back to Florida next year. I don't know what I'm going to do and that depresses me as well. I don't know what I shall do. I guess thats what my Therapist is for. I guess I have something to talk about. Geez, this sucks...