RP Log with naysowee | Bromance?

[fraserphoenix]

[Follows THIS]

There was nothing a top notch widescreen plasma TV could even do to make subtitles good. When you had a head injury, having to read what you were trying to watch was about as fan as smacking yourself in the fash with a dead fish ala Monty Python. Rory was starting to get cabin fever during this whole recuperation bullshit. He was still too weak to do much of anything, but that didn't mean he didn't want to try. Only, he literally couldn't fart in this place without everyone knowing about it. He knew, he had tested the theory. It was about the only fun he could have, too. He was learning there was this period in the evening where all things Kindred seemed to disappear into the darkness. Feeding hour, or something. Even Airlie wasn't around. It wasn't like Blaise had left him high and dry. He had a laptop to use if he wanted, and there was the TV with cable and a shitload of movies if he wanted to watch. But Rory wasn't used to being laid up, and he was starting to get frustrated being isolated like this.

He pushed up and breathlessly got himself sitting on the side of the bed. He could feel things were getting better and he wasn't in massive amounts of pain anymore, but he was still restricted and needed help with certain things. But maybe if he just got up to walk around a bit, he could get some mobility back. And fitness. His fitness would have to be down the shitter by this point. He was hardly eating and he hadn't done anything physical in weeks. He needed to be functioning better so he could start to make the decisions he needed to. Moving had to clear some of the confusion in his head, right?


Mathieu had listened to his godfather, and organised a meal to share with Emmeline. It was true that things were easier to discuss with clothes on, and with full of blood. Mateship was very probably going to have to wait. He and Emmeline could figure out a way for the marriage to work, but mating was something more serious. And he had had to come to terms with the fact that the jealousy wasn't going to fade until he'd been close to her again. Until he was comfortable knowing that she really was his. He was also starting to feel hesitant in doing it while he was still grieving for his father.

Now he was walking the halls again, turning things over and over in his mind as he made his way to Rory's room. He was still thinking about the fact that Blaise had a lot of respect for this Hunter, and that he seemed to believe he was a good match for Mathieu where friendship was concerned. He was also more than willing to help the guy out with breaking the boredom. He knocked before he opened the door and found the Scotsman sitting on the edge of the bed. "Trying to make an escape?"

Rory didn't move when this strange person suddenly entered his room. He stayed still on the side of the bed, his knuckles resting either side of his hips as he peered up at the guy. Yep. Kindred. Another one. Rory just seemed to be able to tell at the moment. His forehead creased slightly as he contemplated the newcomer. He realised he probably had a severe case of bed hair. He hadn't had a haircut in ages and his usually shortly cropped blond hair was getting on the long side. He was also still only in a pair of pyjama pants, the tattoos somehow complimenting the lingering bruises rather than just making Rory look all that more like a dead beat. He made it work, somehow. At least, that's what Airlie said, to which Rory had just snorted at her in amusement. "Trying to stop me?" he asked in return, eyebrows raising slightly.

Mathieu gave a shake of his head. "Only if it falls under the category of protecting you. I'm Mathieu Fraser. I'm Blaise's godson. I'd say I'm sorry I intruded, but this was my intended destination. Apparently mon parrain has got it into his head that you and I could be friends. I suppose I'm curious as to why he thinks that." Mathieu cocked his head as he looked at Rory again. "But you're wary of Kindred, hm?"

Rory sucked in a small breath as he stretched the muscles in his back a little. "Aye, probably does," he submitted wryly. He knew it wouldn't do him or Blaise any good if he wasn't in this mansion right now. Best to cause them both as least stress as possible. Rory was just too damn knackered to fight much right now. "Oh, aye. I've heard aboot you. Just in passing, mind. You and some distant daughter. In saying that, I dinnae mind too much aboot either of you, so you're probably safe. Nay like I'm in any condition to be kicking anyone's arse, though. It seems almost criminal that he is your godfather, by appearance. Too much hottness. If I was a lassie, I'd be in the permanent state of wet knickers aroond you two. Nope, nay wary. I'm just extremely aware of what you lot are capable of right now."

Mathieu's eyebrows drew together as he tried to work out if Rory's compliment really was a compliment. Then he just smirked. No wonder Blaise told him to keep his hands to himself. "Well, keep flattering me like that you don't need to be a lassie. I don't always swing that way, but hey, there's always exceptions. Of course I'm practically a taken man right now so it could get me into trouble. 'Some distant daughter' is Emmeline, my lover. I'm going to ask her to marry me. As wrong as it is for Blaise to be my godfather, he saved my life. My father named me after him. They worked together for many, many years." Mathieu's features shifted as he moved further into the room and took the chair next to Rory's bed. "My father is dead now."

"Ach, seriously, my arse is aboot the only part of me nay hurting right now, so you can keep it in your pants, big boy," Rory returned easily, still contemplating whether he should get up and try to walk around a bit. "Aye? Well, in that case, I hear she is quite the firecracker, so I willnae be giving her any cause to rip my balls off and use them for earrings. Congratulations, too. Marriage is... it's one of the best things you will ever do. Mind, I'm talking on a human scale here. I cannae speak for things like mating and living forever. But you find the The One, it's a feeling you cannae really match. He saved my life too, I think. We should get him a Superman costume, though if he is as hung as I hear he is, the lycra really wouldnae be a favour to the rest of us." He paused, looking over Mathieu's face quitely. "Sympathies, mate. Losing someone who is a massive part of your life I can very much empathise with."

Mathieu let out a chuckle. "I'll do my best. And given the fact you hardly look like you're small yourself, I'm amused that this place seems to keep up with a ten inches or more standard. I'm sure you'd have the lassies wetting their knickers as well." He remembered Blaise mentioning Juliette, but Mathieu wasn't about to make that mistake. If Rory was hurting from the abrupt kick in the nuts, then Mathieu wasn't going to drag it up. He grinned as he thought about Emmeline. "Firecracker's the polite way to put it. Thank you. We spoke about mating, but that's on hold for now. It really is a huge step. Sometimes it's still enough for Kindred to get married until they're sure. Do you believe there can be more than one One?" Mathieu snorted in amusement. "It's hard to imagine Blaise deigning to wear a Superman costume anyway. It's not quite his style. I think he'd rather just walk around naked. Which wouldn't help us either." Mathieu dipped his head. "I'm sorry to hear that you can, but thank you. You have my sympathies as well."

At the question, Rory's face scrunched up slightly and he cleared his throat. "I honestly dinnae mind, mate. Some people say yes, others say that nay one can really live up to your first love. I'm really nay the best authority on any of this. It's been a long time since I had a serious relationship and the lassie I was seeing booted me in the nads to the point I was nearly killed. I'm probably just a wee bitty on the cynical side of love right now. Though, isnae your godfather walking proof that one One isnae all that sound. Doesnae he need love to survive? Indicating he's probably had more than one. Why? Are you thinking aboot moving on from your lassie already, or is there is another prospect in the sidelines you dinnae want to give up when you get hitched? It wouldnae surprise me if you all just walk aroond naked when there was none of us strangers aroond. And I wish I could tell you it stops hurting, but it doesnae. Nay completely."

"No, I haven't got anyone waiting in the wings. I was just curious how you felt. As you said, you know the human scale. While I know my godfather depends on finding more than just one One, I wasn't sure about mortals anymore. It's been a long time since I've been that tied up with humans. It's easy to get caught up in the world Blaise has created. Ah, yes, Juliette. I think she wants to kiss your nads better, you know. She has kept to herself more than usual lately. I've barely seen her since I've arrived. I know Emmeline and I walk around naked as often as we can. There's nothing wrong with being naked." Mathieu shifted as he rubbed his fingers against his eyebrows. "At least you're the first to admit to that."

Rory wet his lips and nursed his chest beneath his palm, still watching Mathieu closely. "Maybe on the human scale, you can only have one bite at the apple. Maybe everything after that feels like a snack compared to the main course. We dinnae have as long as Kindred, so it could make sense. I dinnae know if I can trust Juliette anymore. Time will tell. I dinnae trust many people," he admitted. "When you're on your own, being naked doesnae feel as good. It just feels cold." He shrugged a little, albeit carefully. "Isnae any reason for it to be sugarcoated, laddie. If you were close to your father, he is always going to be in your heart somewhere. That piece of your heart will always hurt a wee bit when you think aboot him. Nothing will replace him, no one. But the heart has room for more than one person, just in different capacities."

Mathieu gave a nod. "That would make sense, although I still think it would serve as a lonely existence. To never feel anything that compares would mean you are never truly happy again, that nothing - no one - will truly satisfy again. I do not know if I like that idea, even if I am sure that there is not another Emmeline out there, and that I would not want anyone else like I want her. So again, I have no real answer. I just think that if something happens to our loves then we shouldn't have to continue on alone. We deserve something. I can't blame you for that at all, mon ami. In fact, I have the exact same problem. I do not let people close often. It is hardly a Ventrue flaw, but just of mine. I need to be sure of someone first." Mathieu's eyes dipped to the floor briefly. "I have yet to experience a time when he was not in my life. I might be Kindred, but I did not leave him. I knew this was coming, but I suppose nothing ever really prepares you."

"I can tell you, that if you lose someone you love with your whole heart and soul, you really do feel like you will never truly be happy again. Life loses some of the shine it used to have. You arenae sure you ever want to risk putting your heart on the line again when the hurt hasnae even stopped the first time. I dinnae think there truly is a right or wrong answer, there is only you and what you feel and experience. What works for someone else, might be a totally different reaction in the next person. Or maybe if you have longer with someone, you can feel like you made something of it and it makes it easy to move on. I dinnae know. I just know that you will always balk in life decisions if you have lost. It's human nature," Rory explained with a sigh. "Nay, there's nothing to prepare you, mate. Nay really. Death is so final. Well, for us humans it is. There is nay coming back, only the end."

"There is coming back if you want it. Sometimes I find myself wondering if I should have offered to Embrace my Dad, but I know this isn't a life he would have wanted. All he wanted was me saved... He was just happy knowing I would keep going. I also assume that given your recent attack, that this life is not something for you? Shame, because I think you'd make a excellent addition to our Kind. Having said that, your humanity and love of it is what makes you so interesting." Mathieu gave Rory a small smile. "I do not envy your heartbreak. Luckily I had nothing like what I have with Emmeline before I was Embraced. I was always a playboy. I could have died never knowing love."

Rory looked at Mathieu calmly. "Aye, and it seems you arenae the only one of that opinion. There are things in this life that I want that I could never have as Kindred. I'm nay a complicated bloke. I'm okay with getting old and contributing to the world a wee bit before I die. There was just a whole lot that was torn away from me. It hardened me. Now I only see the world the way I can tolerate seeing it. I'm nay close-minded. I understand the supernatural extensively, and I have come to know an awful lot about Kindred. I respect your Kind and I have met some great people. But it would be a life of pain for me. I have too much anger in me. I would destroy myself. I was the opposite of you. I was in love from the age of fifteen. I was always faithful. She was my one and only, so to speak. It was only later that I started seeing the world differently."

Mathieu pressed his lips together as he considered Rory. "Until you lost her," he guessed. He hadn't been told the details of Rory's life, but given what he was talking about, he did have a pretty good idea. "If what you want is something you could never have as Kindred, then perhaps it's something you could never have with Kindred. Perhaps it is just as well that Juliette and yourself have fallen out, hm? She would never deny you happiness. Those of us in this house will protect you. You are a friend of Blaise's therefore protection is a given. This really is the safest place for you."

"It isnae something I could have with Kindred," Rory confirmed and slowly wet his lips. "But that doesnae mean I'm such a fucking arsehole as to just give her the brush off and nay try something. Life is never cut and dry. I dinnae fucking believe in fate, so I dinnae believe it's all mapped oot for us. Things can change in the blink of an eye, and Fate doesnae have anything to do with it. It also doesnae mean I didnae put stock in what she was trying to start with me. I did, and it's why my nads still feel like they were kicked so hard, my scrotum was hitting my nose. Dinnae even try to say she was doing me a favour, because it will piss me off," he warned.

Mathieu held his hands up in defense as he held Rory's gaze. "I would never think of saying such a thing, mon ami. Personally I think she was a bitch for what she did. No man deserves just being cut off without a word. At least Emmeline just cuffs me and teases me when she's trying to teach me a lesson." He tilted his head in thought as he considered everything else Blaise had revealed to him and frowned a little. "Is what you want something you could have with that Buffy?"

"Apparently..." Rory murmured and narrowed his eyes slightly in thought. He hadn't really stopped to contemplate Buffy's predicament so much. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to think about it. It was sort of an indifference to the whole thing. Like he couldn't let himself get too invested. If it turned out he was the father, though, he had no idea how he would feel. "She's a friend. She's the reason I got drawn this far into the Kindred world. I'm nay saying I didnae have anything to do with it before, because I did. But it was as an outsider, looking in. It was a world I knew existed, but I couldnae completely fathom it. Until I was standing in a nightclub in Edinburgh and your godfather was looking at me like I was a Big Mac. That was pretty much the moment it all turned."

Mathieu smirked a little. "True love. He looks at anyone that's experienced it like they're a Big Mac. You really have experienced the real thing. She's a friend, but there was sex at some point? Blaise told me she's pregnant. That there are two possible fathers. You're one of them. Does that make... Sergeant Finn the other one? Sticky situation. No wonder my godfather's so riled up. He'll be conflicted. If he does actually have feelings for Buffy somewhere deep down then there'll be an urge to touch her, to be close to her. But knowing that she's covered in your essence, then he'll want to be nowhere near her. Not while the drain still has a hold on the two of you. I really have walked into the middle of a tricky situation."

Rory pressed his lips together. "Aye? Well, imagine how I feel," he pointed out quietly. "I didnae just lose my wife, mate. I lost my baby daughter, too. Blaise isnae the only one struggling with conflicting feelings right now. I feel for him, I really do. It wasnae purposeful if I did get her pregnant. First time, Blaise didnae even exist in our lives, and the second time, we were really drunk. But aye, she did sleep with the soldier when we got to Paris. Large history there, sometimes it just comes back to bite you in the arse, like. Cannae deny she is pregnant. Blaise was the one who apparently realised it. But the situation is fucked. How does a bairn survive in this world?"

Mathieu gave a shake of his head. "I don't know. I can't say I've ever thought about a baby being present in a world like ours. I don't even know if a Kindred-mortal relationship has ever involved babies. Obviously not between the two kinds, but even just through adoption, or surrogates of some kind. And I'm hardly going to say this is your fault. You don't need to justify your encounters to me. As I said, I'm hardly a judge. I've done far worse in my time, although obviously pregnancy was never an outcome. Sleeping with friends is never a bad thing."

Rory gave a slight shake of his head and if he wasn't already sitting hunched over, his shoulders probably would have slumped a little. "It all just keeps going from bad to fucking worse. I'm tired, I cannae handle it all. I dinnae even mind what to think. My brain doesnae feel like my brain, which is hard to describe, but that's the best I've got. I dinnae even know what I'm supposed to say to either of them. Any of them, really. I wouldnae have picked this to happen in a million years."

Mathieu tried to give him a reassuring smile. "It will wear off eventually. At least the part where Blaise and Ventrue seems to be ruling. You'll hopefully be back to yourself once you've healed. It has to be hard, but you're not alone here. If there's anything you need - that isn't medical related - just ask. If you ever just want to talk man to Kindred, I'm willing to listen."

"He has this nurse, though to be honest, she's probably just a snack for him. Good nurse, though. Just feels weird to be nursed by Kindred..." Rory glanced over at the window, the blinds hanging open a little now it was dark outside. Weird how he was automatically acting like Kindred. He had been studying to be a nurse once, but that ambition was lost when his family disappeared. He rarely thought about it these days. "If Emmeline hadnae been Kindred, and you were, would you try to draw her into your world?"

Mathieu slid a little lower in the chair as he rest his head in his hand and hummed in thought. He tried to imagine meeting Emmeline now as a mortal. "I realise this might be missing the point, but I think Emmeline would have been the one to want to step into my world in the first place. Although, if I'm performing the Masquerade properly then it would be sometime before she knew what I was. I think, yes.In the end I would have wanted it. If she was not okay with my world, then I would have no wish to keep her here. Being here, being with my godfather, it is a big part of who I am. As capable of staying in the mortal world as some Kindred are, I'm not sure I would be able to give it up."

"You wouldnae have been ever tempted to take her against her will?" Rory pressed, holding Mathieu's gaze intently. He knew Airlie had been Embraced just in a situation like that, but it was in a fit of uncontrollable passion, and not a purposeful urge for her Sire to draw her into his world. In fact, he had been devastated, nearly took his own life when he realised what he did to her. But this time, it wasn't Airlie's situation Rory was referring to.

Mathieu shook his head. "No. Never. That is not how Kindred work. At least not Kindred faithful to what we are. Accidents happen. There will always be Embraces that occur during intense moments of passion. We are still connected to the blood. We still can let ourselves go too far if we are lost, or if we are young. But to willingly Embrace someone against their will? No, I wouldn't do that. She would hate me."

Rory tilted his head slightly as he contemplated that answer. "Aye. Okay. So, what about those who are faithful to who and what they were before they were Embraced against their will? What if they had it all before it happened and they couldnae let it go?" he pressed. This wasn't a conversation he had been able to have with Juliette, on any level. It really wasn't a subject he knew how to approach easily with anyone.

Matihieu ran his tongue over his lips as he bided his time for his answer. He had thought about this often, especially given the fact his godfather was one of a similar situation. "While some of it may well come down to what clan they are Embraced into, it is something that they can either let destroy them with anger, or something they can learn to deal with. Blaise is an example of the latter. He will always hate the man that did it to him. That is without question. The relationship with his Sire will never be what mine is with him. He has learned to live the life of Kindred though, to become such a fine example that he is the Ventrue Prince in this city."

"And what if it was your True Love you were forced to leave behind. How would you feel if someone ripped Emmeline away from you right now, but you later heard she was still alive, but not who you remembered she was? I really wish I had a way to fathom any of this, but aye, I respect Kindred and I respect how the Kind has evolved to be the least threat to humans as they can. What I dinnae get, however, is when the lines blur. Where do the sacrifices begin and end," Rory murmured, a confused frown forming on his forehead.

Mathieu just watched Rory quietly for a moment as he tried to work out exactly what he was getting at, and then the dots connected in his mind, and Mathieu's expression saddened. It couldn't be easy finding out your wife was taken to become Kindred. It also possibly explained the attacks on the young man when he seemed to have no ill will towards Kindred. "If she was not who I remembered, then as selfish as it sounds, I would not want to know her. It would be better to keep the memory of how I did remember her, of how I loved her. There is nothing worse than having a treasured memory replaced with a horrible one. I would be devastated, and I would be broken. I would just know that in time it may heal. Or quite possibly I will never have Blaise's strength to heal and try again. I do not need love as he does. The lines blur because not all Kindred are... restrained? Not quite sure I like that word. Tragedy seems to keep finding you, and for that I apologise. You deserve some happiness, mon ami. It just may not come in the traditional form."

Rory raised an eyebrow. "Restrained? Ach, laddie. Are you seriously going to try and play the restrained card after I am sitting here, four times drained and my best friend taken against her will? Some are restrained perhaps, but that isnae a trait all your Kind are privvy to. Some dinnae want restraint. I have ill will towards Kindred. I have a lot of ill will. I am terrified of you all. I wish I wasnae, but I am. I respect you, and I could exist crossing into your realm, but I dinnae know how I am supposed to even begin to try and feel comfortable enough to let you near me when emotions are involved."

"That's why I didn't like the word restrained, but the word I wanted was escaping me. It still escaped me. Our goal is not to scare you. Not really. And I realise that not all of us restraint, that these attacks can happen. You've experienced Brujah for yourself, and I assume you've seen Blaise in action. Any of us could slip up, be pushed too far. Especially when we are young. I am sorry you are terrified. I have no wish to hurt you, or feed from you." Mathieu leaned forward a little to catch Rory's gaze again. "All you can do is take it one step at a time if it's still something you want. If you decide to stay in France for any reason, I have a house you are more than welcome to. It was the one I bought for my father. I will be staying here for some time, I do not need it."

Rory shrugged. "I've only seen him in action all fangs oot, silver eyeballs coming at me. Nay other way. Isnae so..." He waved his hand. "I dinnae want in his expensive jocks, so it wasnae as much a thrill for me as for most who probably experience that. I've got flashes in my mind of the past times this all happened. At least, I did when he first came at me. It was instinctive to want to fight him off, but then he had complete control over me. It's hazy from then on. Next thing I know, I'm waking up to a voice and Buffy in my room. Now I dinnae mind what is memories or what is just nightmares. I cannae sleep well withoot being medicated. I dinnae mind if I'm ever going to be the same again. I cannae stay here, I have my wee dog back hame. And a job. Clients."

Mathieu gave a nod. "Of course. It was just a suggestion. The dog could have been brought here. Hopefully you will not be stuck here for too long if you yearn to be back in Edinburgh. I can't blame you for it, not when a city can form so much a part of us. You need time to sort your head out. It will come, Rory. Have some faith in yourself, and your friends. It is important to keep them close."

Rory smirked. "Either you're gonna break oot the cheerleader pom-poms, or I'm gonna start calling you Dr Phil. Next you'll be telling me I should talk to my brother. Are you the cavalry they sent in here to convince me to stay? I dinnae need a shrink, you know. I have Valium for that," he joked. "You talk like this is fixable. It isnae. I know nothing is ever gonna be the same for me anymore, and I just gotta live with that. Isnae any amount of self faith that's gonna change that."

"Please don't call me Dr Phil, and I only break out the pom-poms on special occasions. I just happen to like you. I would like to see you be happy. I'm not completely sure why. Sometimes you just know these things." Mathieu stood up as he smoothed his hands over his t-shirt and then tucked his hands in his back pocket. "It might not be fixable, but you can still adapt. All is not completely lost. I know this because I've been around my godfather, and because he has seen a lot of this world."

Rory found that he was much more at ease when Mathieu had been sitting, and now that he had risen, Rory's blue eyes were once again locked on him as he sat still on the bed. Something inside him was trying to tell him to stay calm, but he was unnverved. He needed to work on the strange feelings he seemed to have picked up inside. "He's powerful. He's royalty. He has better coping mojo than I could only ever dream of."

Mathieu cocked his head when he sensed the change in Rory and moved back to the chair. He had been getting restless, thoughts of his father giving him an urge to go off and find solace to be alone with his memories. Once he was settled in the chair again, Mathieu smirked a little. "He has more of that than any of us, mon ami. I am lucky to be a fifth of the Kindred he is."

"Would you be his replacement if he ever..." Rory waved his hand a little. "I know Kindred arenae completely immortal. You come to your end eventually, just too long for it to count in general. Unless there is a Kindred illness of some sort, I assume. Didnae even know they existed until Juliette said Blaise was ailing. Or, you know, assassination. Though he has survived this long without that happening. Just shows how tough he really is. Still, he must have a successor in line."

"Juliette," Mathieu answered without hesitation. "I really think it would be Juliette before it's me. She knows his business better than I do. Maybe one day I could take over, but not yet. I haven't been around long enough. I'm good at being his support, but I really don't know about being the Prince. There are few illnesses that effect us. It's more often bad blood than anything else."

Rory nodded and cleared his throat. "I've heard aboot the bad blood. Before I heard aboot it with Blaise. I have friends in Edinburgh who have had many years experience with Kindred. We probably have as big a population of you guys there as Paris does. Old countries, and all that. I hear our Prince is a lassie, too. Girl Power and all that. Personally, any lassies in power are as scary as all bollocks. They'll kick any arse necessary," he said in amusement.

Mathieu chuckled quietly. "They also want love just like anyone else. They don't always want to be feared. No one in power does. They just want that one person, or a few close friends they can just be themselves with. Edinburgh and Paris have always been connected where the Kindred are concerned. Your Prince is Juliette's Sire. She's an old friend of Blaise's. I know this is all daunting, and this would be one reason we keep it from humans. Still, you're safe with us, Rory."

"If that is a veiled attempt to try and push me back into Juliette's bed, just forget it," Rory murmured. He wasn't stupid. He knew what Mathieu was referring to because he hadn't been referring to love or relationships at all. Just women in power. It was a dramatic change of conversation route. "Aye, I heard that. I'm nay daunted. You would be surprised how much I can take before I get daunted these days. I've just had a head injury, and I dinnae feel myself. This isnae my hame. I dinnae have a hold on anything. It's nay a feeling I like very much at all."

Mathieu smiled at him. "That was my one comment. From now on I'll keep my mouth shut. If there is anything I can do to make you feel like you have more of a hold, just let me know. Maybe you don't feel daunted, but you are still in a fragile state right now. Take it easy, hm? Don't worry about keeping up appearances, or trying to be strong."

"I need time. I dinnae need you all making me feel guilty because poor Juliette made a mistake. Maybe it was just a mistake, but I nearly lost my life for it. Excuse a guy for needing a wee bit of time to process that. Nay to mention that, aye, she's Kindred, and Kindred did this to me. Probably nay the first time, either, and then Kindred did it to me again to fix me. Only, I wouldnae have needed fixing in the first place if none of this even happened. I didnae do anything wrong. I was just me. I was rolling with it, and I'm the one who comes out in the biggest pile of shite ever. I didnae do anything to hurt anyone, I just seem to keep being the one to get hurt over and fucking over. I'm fucking sick of it," Rory said with a frown, really not meaning to accidentally offload to Mathieu like that. "The only time I'm nay getting hurt is when I'm on my fucking own."

Mathieu held his hands up again. "I wasn't trying to say that, and I am not trying to make you feel guilty. You misunderstand me. I'm sorry if I hit a nerve, I really wasn't aiming for one. If she's hurt you that much then of course you don't need to forgive her, you don't need to try with her again. You don't need to do anything, Mr Buchanan. I am merely saying that for now you are in the safest place and you just need to focus on healing and getting over your injuries. That is it. You might not be on your own, but right now I am fairly certain that you will not be hurt while you're under this roof."

Rory scratched his fingers over the reddish-blond stubble on his cheek. "Aye, until a lassie comes in here and tells you that you might have knocked her up," he said wryly. "Condoms, seriously. You cannae trust the fuckers. Nay that you have to worry aboot that, but if you did, they would suck. It would just be easier if it was the other bloke's kid."

"Do you really think that it would be easier?" Mathieu asked as his eyes narrowed slightly. "This is what you want, isn't it? It may not have happened how you wanted, and you might not be sure of it all just yet, but this is still giving you something you yearn for if my deductions are correct. And to be honest, if you're going to accidentally wind up with a baby, then at least it's with a friend, and not a one night stand."

Rory nodded without hesitation. "Aye, I fucking do think it would be easier, mate. I'm sorry. I'm nay fucking optimist. Maybe I was one day, but nay anymore. This isnae what I want at all. I dinnae want a replacement bairn to take the place of my daughter. I dinnae want some fucked up situation where the lassie apparently carrying my kid doesnae know her arse from her face when it comes to love. Nay bairn should be brought up in a situation like this. I'm sorry, but that is just how I feel. Tell me, Yoda, what is so wonderful aboot anything to do with accidentally winding up with a bairn to a chick in love with a supernatural Prince, who happens to have fanged my neck and now lives in my head?"

Mathieu's features school themselves into an unreadable expression as he sat there silently for a few moments. "The fact that it is not a replacement baby, but a new one that sounds as if it really could use your love. And the fact that a girl who seems so lost with love might need your help, and the child's help to finally learn what it's all about. And the fact that if Blaise does manage to accept this, to accept her, to accept the child - your baby will never have to live without, they will never have to live in fear. He would do anything to protect his family, and those close to it. You already fall under that banner despite the fact that the fangs in your neck seem to prove otherwise."

Rory pointed to his throat. "This isnae foreplay for me, I'm sorry. It brings me fear and a feeling that I have lost hold on my entire life. There is a high chance I lost my wife and bairn to Kindred hands, that she was Embraced. There is a high chance she approched me and tried to draw me into her world, and I was nearly taken too. Then I come here, open-minded because I figure me and Juliette hit it off and had some fun. I figure that if she expects me to understand her world, then I expect the same in return. Only then I'm sitting ootside in my truck with about twenty rifle barrels pointed at me while some fucker informs me Juliette wants nothing to do with me, despite me telling her I would be back to see her. Then I'm getting attacked by no less than four extremely pissy Kindred with steel capped boots and large fists. It's the last thing I mind, short of waking up feeling like I wanted to rip the fucking throats oot of anyone who got near me, including my own brother. Forgive me for struggling to find a place here where I feel safe," he said, biting the last word off.

Mathieu stood again when he had the feeling that he needed to make himself scarce. There really would be nothing he could say to make Rory feel comfortable, and part of him wasn't even sure if he wanted to. Just like Mathieu needed to be alone with his grief for his father, Rory probably needed to be alone with his grief regarding the attack, and his wife. Everything was dragging up the memories, and Mathieu didn't know the man well enough yet to know what he would need to counteract it. "No, please, forgive me for trying to force you to just accept the fact that you're here. I realise it can't be easy for you at all. I only hope that you will start to find some sort of happiness in the future. You are a good man, Rory. I am honoured to have met you."

Rory cleared his throat. "You're restless. Please, dinnae let me keep you. I think by now we're probably freaking each other out more than actually helping each other. It was nice to meet you, seriously, and it's nice to keep learning all the sides Blaise has to him and that he isnae just an untouchable royal treasure with no heart. I think that's a lot of what Buffy needs to see with her own eyes to know what she can have here. But me? I just sort of come along for the ride, and now I sort of feel like I'm stuck at the top of it upside doon and just really, really want to get off. Congrats again to you and Emmeline. Marriage is amazing. You'll love it."

Mathieu gave him an unsure smile before he gave a slight bow. "Thank you. I really am sorry if I did make anything worse. It was never my intention. I just wanted to meet the man my godfather is so impressed with. Hopefully you will not find yourself so stuck at some point." Mathieu gave him a wave in place of a handshake so he abided by his godfather's rules before he slipped out of the room to leave Rory to himself. He really had no idea why Rory had freaked him out, but he really was feeling restless as a result of it.