(no subject)
I dont know what to do....my life is like a down hill spiral right now...its one thing after another...
Stephen cannot leave Iraq until May 21st, which means he will be home around the 24. That is over a week after when we had anticipated, so it sucks.
I have been wicked stressed with all the classes, HW and papers &projects that are to get done. Then when he told me that today it was like 500 pounds had been added onto me, Seeing him the day I was done finals was going to get me though the end. Yea Im grateful that he is ABLE to come home, and we are going to be able to fall asleep in each others arms, and fall in love with each other all over again, and go on a beautiful vacation, but everything and all the plans have to be reworked. Rick is coming home a few days before him, so they will be overlapping, which sucks b/c I can only be in one country and state at a time. and then I gotta bolt to San Diego as soon as he leeaves to go back to Iraq, which sucks even more--I dont want him to leave EVER...we belong togetherrrr making banana panckaes in a big house on a farm with a big rabbit farm out back ;)
I don't know why I am so frusterated....I just want to scream. But Im keeping the smile on my face and working hard to climb over this mountain. Tomorrow night Im gonna relax, party, and forget the stress...maybe even forget the night haha. I will continue my papers on Sunday. I think I am so upset because I care so much about everything I am doing that I cannot blow it off. i want to do good, i want to exceed my personal standards, and I want to make my parents happy with how I am conducting my life.
I am NOT living in Vermont for the summer...apparently the job I have now, I will have to "retire" from when I officially transfer to Norwich, which is May 1st. So I can no longer work their since its at Castleton. I am sure I can find other jobs up here, but I think I will just come up here on the weekends or something. I have three more years of living in Vermont, Ill get it done during that time. I cannot replace hickin lifestyle with the GWE, ganset beach, campfires with everyone, and being with the people that wlll always mean the most to me...I dont care about any of the petty bullshit, Im not gonna be negative or "mean" to anyone. i will smile and say hello even if you hate my guts.