(no subject)

[fransmasereel]

So far, the demons of 2005 have taken a more ambitious route through my everyday tasks, morphing like vowels to suit the situation, and so far, being just as useful, but keeping me from feeling as carefree as I am used to being. This is okay, it's about time I exercised some restraint, even if it makes me feel like a jerk for entertaining the wrong ideas, even if I have no intentions of pushing them into action. Nice things are happening all about me right now, though each event seems to wear a soft layer of stress which gives my perception the impression that there's everywhere to go, which in reality means that there's no place to go at all if I am greedy. It's hard not to be greedy when everything stinks of promise and also hard not to look at each choice and wonder about paper façades. Does it pay to be fearless? Sure...sometimes, but the properties of fearlessness seem to teeter perilously close to the rules of the lottery, though with better odds and worse losses. Perhaps my timing is just off. Perhaps I'm too unfocused. Perhaps I've backed myself into a corner which makes me feel as though I cannot speak my mind in this forum, but that is a level of fearlessness where I've got a pretty good grasp of the odds, thus I remain vague.

In an incredible mix of humor and poignancy with which he has such a wonderful grasp, Jimmer said to me last night, "Perhaps Bigfoot is actually blurry in real life." Without explaining the context, the statement loses a bit of its colorful pop, but it really was a wonderful thing to say, considering the topic at hand. That fellow's wit is stunningly active, sharp, and concise.

Perhaps I have all the information I need.