Done.
since no1 reads this anymore i think i can say how i feel now
im giving/given up on hope =(
shes well bored of me n clearly found some1 else
someone better than i'll ever be
a guess il need to be content with a wave n a smile now coz shes barley even says hey anymore =(
ave never genuinley liked a girl before, but this time am pretty sure i did, as beautiful as she was, that wsent what was important to me
i loved how i cud sit n tok to her about everything n anything n she wudent get grossed out n just join in, and how every rotten thing in my day seemed oblivious to me the second she signed in
now i cant say hey without ponderin on how little i have to say
i blame work, i hate the place, its ruined everything
i sit and think, i rly hope i dont see her today, i rly hope our breaks not at the same time blah blah, coz everythin seems so awkward now and so much of an effort, it makes me feel so down =(
thats the worst thing ever, coz all i ever wanted was to see her all the time, but im so self consious i think like that, if i have 1 wee spot am like =| or if i think ma hairs shite am like =|, and my consious is tellin me that everything i think, has slowly brought the downfall, it is coz that spots mingin, it is coz ma hair shite, it is coz blah blah blah =(
i cud change, but thats not what matters, differnt hair colour, better clothes, peircings, tatoo's watever
they shudent matter, and i shudent think theyl change anything
i did, i had this crazy idea that the things i dont have r the things that will make me better, now i dont, thats y am leaving it
thats y am staying me, and not becomming some false version of me, trying to be sum1 else coz its not rite
im me, and im boring now, im imature, bleak, and cant hold a conversation past, aye it was roastin today
i can only hope/pray that il ever meet sum half as amazin, and fun
but everyone hopes to find that person, sum of us do, weather they feel the same....
best never comes easy, but runing it for urself is far to simple
im bored tierd n empty, with no motivation and nothing to make me feel better
the best part of my day is gone, prolly never to return, worse, prolly found that new some1, and to busy to speak =(
its fine tho coz every1 needs some1 new n blah blah, i cud say hope all goes well but everyone knows thats a lie, we all say but no1 means it
i do hope shes happy tho, coz shes the most amazing person, n unless she see's this lol (id die from embaressment) im pretty sure wel be friends
or mabee its all a false alousioon ive built up in my head, n everythings still fines, its just the mental strain from work that mad me change, made me not know what to say, hhow to be funny, n be able to sit up til1 n babel on about mindless shit i did when i was young, stuff i watched in the past, n how beautiful you are
or mabee its how i put it first
either way, im seem paranoid......but im just done.
please god dont see this.
if you do =| its not about u..... its about a magicaly unicorn called larry =)
he gives me good touch, and makes me smile in my pants )
xx.
im giving/given up on hope =(
shes well bored of me n clearly found some1 else
someone better than i'll ever be
a guess il need to be content with a wave n a smile now coz shes barley even says hey anymore =(
ave never genuinley liked a girl before, but this time am pretty sure i did, as beautiful as she was, that wsent what was important to me
i loved how i cud sit n tok to her about everything n anything n she wudent get grossed out n just join in, and how every rotten thing in my day seemed oblivious to me the second she signed in
now i cant say hey without ponderin on how little i have to say
i blame work, i hate the place, its ruined everything
i sit and think, i rly hope i dont see her today, i rly hope our breaks not at the same time blah blah, coz everythin seems so awkward now and so much of an effort, it makes me feel so down =(
thats the worst thing ever, coz all i ever wanted was to see her all the time, but im so self consious i think like that, if i have 1 wee spot am like =| or if i think ma hairs shite am like =|, and my consious is tellin me that everything i think, has slowly brought the downfall, it is coz that spots mingin, it is coz ma hair shite, it is coz blah blah blah =(
i cud change, but thats not what matters, differnt hair colour, better clothes, peircings, tatoo's watever
they shudent matter, and i shudent think theyl change anything
i did, i had this crazy idea that the things i dont have r the things that will make me better, now i dont, thats y am leaving it
thats y am staying me, and not becomming some false version of me, trying to be sum1 else coz its not rite
im me, and im boring now, im imature, bleak, and cant hold a conversation past, aye it was roastin today
i can only hope/pray that il ever meet sum half as amazin, and fun
but everyone hopes to find that person, sum of us do, weather they feel the same....
best never comes easy, but runing it for urself is far to simple
im bored tierd n empty, with no motivation and nothing to make me feel better
the best part of my day is gone, prolly never to return, worse, prolly found that new some1, and to busy to speak =(
its fine tho coz every1 needs some1 new n blah blah, i cud say hope all goes well but everyone knows thats a lie, we all say but no1 means it
i do hope shes happy tho, coz shes the most amazing person, n unless she see's this lol (id die from embaressment) im pretty sure wel be friends
or mabee its all a false alousioon ive built up in my head, n everythings still fines, its just the mental strain from work that mad me change, made me not know what to say, hhow to be funny, n be able to sit up til1 n babel on about mindless shit i did when i was young, stuff i watched in the past, n how beautiful you are
or mabee its how i put it first
either way, im seem paranoid......but im just done.
please god dont see this.
if you do =| its not about u..... its about a magicaly unicorn called larry =)
he gives me good touch, and makes me smile in my pants )
xx.