its hard to let go.
but sometimes you have to. when god closes a door, he opens a window.
and i hope that the window he opened is really big. so i can jump through.
things that are constantly bugging me:
my weight
my hair
my thoughts
my heart
my brain.
i wish that things could have worked out, for the second time, but they didn't. of course, the first weekend was perfect, and the second time around we slipped into the monotonous schedule that we carried out before. and i didn't want to get sucked back into that world. so, i left again, still wishing that things could have been different. the sex was good, but that wasn't enough to keep me there.
i don't understand women who can stay with someone who doesn't treat them like they're the whole world. i don't understand how someone can stay in a relationship where the love isn't real, where they aren't being treated well, and they don't feel special. maybe i was made different, because i sure as hell couldn't deal with it. maybe i just have a problem with love, and being in it.
no, thats not right. the begining was full of the love, and the end was the point where i felt more alone and numb than i ever had. it just makes me so sad to think that i can still care about someone a lot, and i know that they care about me, but they refuse to change to better themselves and have me. because it makes me feel not worth the change, you dig?
but, i know just as well as anyone else that you can't change anyone. they have to want it themselves.
and i hope that the window he opened is really big. so i can jump through.
things that are constantly bugging me:
my weight
my hair
my thoughts
my heart
my brain.
i wish that things could have worked out, for the second time, but they didn't. of course, the first weekend was perfect, and the second time around we slipped into the monotonous schedule that we carried out before. and i didn't want to get sucked back into that world. so, i left again, still wishing that things could have been different. the sex was good, but that wasn't enough to keep me there.
i don't understand women who can stay with someone who doesn't treat them like they're the whole world. i don't understand how someone can stay in a relationship where the love isn't real, where they aren't being treated well, and they don't feel special. maybe i was made different, because i sure as hell couldn't deal with it. maybe i just have a problem with love, and being in it.
no, thats not right. the begining was full of the love, and the end was the point where i felt more alone and numb than i ever had. it just makes me so sad to think that i can still care about someone a lot, and i know that they care about me, but they refuse to change to better themselves and have me. because it makes me feel not worth the change, you dig?
but, i know just as well as anyone else that you can't change anyone. they have to want it themselves.