(no subject)
Every year this happens.. I get really bummed out. I haven't had an actual boyfriend over the holidays to cuddle with ever, and to buy silly Christmas gifts for.. I don't think I'm cut out for relationships, they always turn sour too fast. So I'm just going to give it all up now, then I never have to worry about wasting money on someone who is going to break up with me two months down the road, or two years down the road. But the main thing that bothers me every year, is Christmas day is also my Grandpa's Birthday and I miss him a lot... Isn't it suppose to get easier with time? Wrongo. I stayed up all night watching home movies from 15 years ago. It made me miss him so much more. I miss sitting cuddled up next to him shoving my mouth full of a shitty McDonalds cheeseburger, then playing in the play place.. Then in the other videos, I realized out of My Grandma, Aunt Kay, Aunt Edith, and Aunt Dot, my Grandma is the only one left. Everything was great then, now its just a mess.
I hate Christmas.
I hate Christmas.