Rude awakening: You know your getting old when you turn on the sink, leave the water running, and the kitchen overflows.
Today when I came home, my grandma was sitting outside in the sun,
trying to escape the smell of the painters, right? So when I get home
she decides to go inside and when she walks in the kitchen and yells
"MEENA! WHAT IS THIS MESS!??!?!" So me && Ali run in there and
the whole fucking kitchen is soaked in water, all over the sink, on the
floor, in the cabinets, EVERYWHERE. Soo, I had to clean it all up. It
sucked.
In PE, Alyssa & Hailey had another fight and this is how it went -
Alyssa: Shut up
Hailey: No you shut up
Alyssa: No YOU shut up!
Hailey: SHUT UP!
Alyssa: Bitch you need to shut up!
Hailey: Your MOM needs to shut up!
What a classic Hailey line, don't you think?
And than I was talking to Chad, this is how that went.
Me: Chad, how the fuck did you get that huge scab on your chin?
Chad: Well, you know The Game? That rapper?
Me: Yeah...
Chad: Well we were having sex and he bite me, what a fiesty bastard.
Here's a picture of that fool from last summer.
A dime has 118 ridges around the
edge.
A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.
A crocodile cannot stick out its
tongue.
A dragonfly has a life span of 24
hours.
A goldfish has a memory span of three
seconds.
A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time
for 1/100th of a second.
A shark is the only fish that can
blink with both eyes.
A snail can sleep for three years.
Al Capone's business card said he was
a used furniture dealer.
All 50 states are listed across the
top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill
Almonds are a member of the peach
family.
An ostrich's eye is bigger than its
brain.
Babies are born without kneecaps.
They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age.
Butterflies taste with their feet.
Cats have over one hundred vocal
sounds. Dogs only have about 10.
"Dreamt" is the only English word
that ends in the letters "mt".
February 1865 is the only month in
recorded history not to have a full moon.
In the last 4,000 years, no new
animals have been domesticated.
If the population of China walked
past you, in single file, the line would never end because of the rate of
reproduction.
If you are an average American, in
your whole life, you will spend an average of 6 months waiting at red
lights.
It's impossible to sneeze with your
eyes open.
Leonardo Da Vinci invented the
scissors.
Maine is the only state whose name is
just one syllable.
No word in the English language
rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.
On a Canadian two dollar bill, the
flag flying over the Parliament building is an American flag.
Our eyes are always the same size
from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.
Peanuts are one of the ingredients of
dynamite.
Rubber bands last longer when
refrigerated.
"Stewardesses" is the longest word
typed with only the left hand and "lollipop" with your right.
The average person's left hand does
56% of the typing.
The cruise liner, QE2, moves only six
inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.
The microwave was invented after a
researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.
The sentence: "The quick brown fox
jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet.
The winter of 1932 was so cold that
Niagara Falls froze completely solid.
The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and
'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left
(palindromes).
There are 293 ways to make change for
a dollar.
There are more chickens than people
in the world.
There are only four words in the
English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous,
and hazardous
There are two words in
the English language that have all five vowels in order: "abstemious" and
"facetious."
There's no Betty Rubble in the
Flintstones Chewables Vitamins.
Tigers have striped skin, not just
striped fur.
TYPEWRITER is the longest word that
can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.
Winston Churchill was born in a
ladies' room during a dance.
Women blink nearly twice as much as
men.
Your stomach has to produce a new
layer of mucus every two weeks; otherwise it will digest itself.
Now you know
everything