IT'S MY LIFE.
DON'T YOU FORGET.
So everyone's allowed to have their opinion on everything. People can make their decisions and judgements but seriously, JUST STAY THE EFF OUT IF IT DOESN'T CONCERN YOU!
I'm seriously sick of the lame comments from people that have nothing to do with it. I hate the LJ posts that directly and indirectly relate to MY
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But yeah. If you're friends with some of Rob's friends...don't always believe what they tell you because take it from me, they exaggerate on a lot of details and word spreads and as it does, the stories change.
Honestly, I know I don't have everything under control but see, that's the thing, I'm not trying to have it all under control. I'm taking things day by day and playing it all by ear. I'm sick of overanalyzing everything in my life and trying to have a plan. I just want things to happen and for me to stop being so concerned with it all. I'm sick of routine and dull days. I'm trying to step away from that for a while. As far as having a nervous breakdown goes, who knows. You're probably right because I can be a very weak person at times. There's really just no telling with me. I have friends that will be there for me when it happens. I don't need a lot of people in my life, just the ones that really care. Rob's always going to be there for me until I do something to really make him hate me. I have Melissa, who would never leave my side because we've had our friendship for 8 years now and we've probably gotten in a total for 4 fights, none of which have been serious. Not to mention she is the most supportive person I know and has never told me what to do. She's probably the greatest person in my life. There's Renee... although we aren't like we once were, I still consider her my sister and she's always back there somwhere for me. She's more stern with me than Melissa, which is good sometimes, annoying at others. She'll tell me straight up what she thinks about what's going on and what she thinks I should do. We usually get in fights over this since I hate people telling me what to do, but I know she does it because she loves me. I have Gavin... a distant best friend but he's ALWAYS there for talking stuff out with. Bailey, whom I can't believe I'm mentioning last just because.. I don't know, she's Bailey. She would die before ending our friendship. It's not friends I'm worried about, though I do need to widen my circle of friends.
Now for my relationship with Robbie..
Since you don't know me very well, there's probably a lot you don't know. I know it's easy to think, "how can she throw something so perfect away?" I can't answer that because I don't even know. All I know is first loves don't last forever. The magic was wonderful while it lasted. I love Robbie. I love every moment I have ever shared with him and I wouldn't take it back for the world. We've made some great memories. We've gone through hell and back again together. I will achieve that one day with someone else, though. Loves come and go. There's just something inside me that needed this stage of my life to end, or take a break or something. I really honestly can't explain that to anyone.
Everything I'm doing really is kind of spur of the moment because like I said before, I'm sick of analyzing everything. I don't plan on making any reckless decisions or be stupid. I just want to be a young, single, teenage girl. I want to party. I want to have one. I want to worry about serious commitments later on because right now I just don't feel like is the time for that.
"Friends with benefits"... just ignore that. I'm not being completely serious. Matt and I are friends. We'll probably kiss from time to time. That's as far as that goes.
I'm not trying to mess with people's minds. If you knew me you'd know that I'm a complex little girl whose mind works in ways that even I cannot understand. My heart will be telling me 8 different things while my mind is telling me 5 other things. It gets difficult to decide which to follow.
My confidence...lacking most of the time but it gets up there every now and then.
Respectable? I try to be.
Put-together, usually.
Angry... yes because sometimes people's opinions get to me. I hate it when people I do not know have such strong and negative opinions about me because I don't feel they have a reason to. And more than anything I can't stand having people all in my business, that's probably one of my biggest pet peeves.
<3
Thanks, I guess.
And this is way longer than I intended it to be. Sorry.
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yeah ashley geez quit doing things on the spurT of the moment.
haha.
its even more poigniant when spellT wrong.
man why can i not just read people's attempts to be real without pointing out their grammatical weaknesses?
because im gay.
GAY FOR ASHLEY
Whooaoaoaoaoa
hahhaahiloveyou
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