Murder by numbers, one, two, three ...
I am brushing up on my urbane* evil phrases. Why? Because I'm a writer, that's why. You have to have good evil phrases at your fingertips for any likely situation. That's just true.
"How gratifying." There's nothing intrinsically evil to the word gratifying. Except ... who uses it when there are other words that are less condescending? "Gratifying" has connotations of old-world royalty, class war, and snobbery. No one who says "how gratifying" has anyone's best interests at heart, except their own.**
"Excellent." Someone who uses this word to express happiness at an outcome or proposed activity is either evil, or British. Sometimes both. I'm sorry, but you can't argue with facts.***
"Consider it done." This generally means death.**** Unclear as to whose.
"For your (their) own good." [shudders] Sooooo evil.
"Errors have been made." This is middle-management evil. Not so urbane, but great at passing the evil buck. Or puck. I forget.
"Bring the prisoners." Enough said.
"My fine fellow." This phrase went out of popular usage sometime early last century, and even then it was only said by jerks. Anyone saying this now is most likely planning to kill you and sell your organs.*****
Anyone else got any? Send them along! Good evil phrases are so ... gratifying.
Muuaahahahahahaha!
*Why urbane? Because gritty and/or stupid evil phrases are so natural to us Amurricans that it hardly seems necessary to brush up.
** Note: this is probably only true in fiction.
***"Facts" being things I make up right now. What? I'm a writer. What did you expect?
****Also probably only true in fiction. But it still sends chills down the spine, doesn't it?
*****But they'll do it in some ironic, steam-punk kind of way that proves to them their own superiority. Jerks.
"How gratifying." There's nothing intrinsically evil to the word gratifying. Except ... who uses it when there are other words that are less condescending? "Gratifying" has connotations of old-world royalty, class war, and snobbery. No one who says "how gratifying" has anyone's best interests at heart, except their own.**
"Excellent." Someone who uses this word to express happiness at an outcome or proposed activity is either evil, or British. Sometimes both. I'm sorry, but you can't argue with facts.***
"Consider it done." This generally means death.**** Unclear as to whose.
"For your (their) own good." [shudders] Sooooo evil.
"Errors have been made." This is middle-management evil. Not so urbane, but great at passing the evil buck. Or puck. I forget.
"Bring the prisoners." Enough said.
"My fine fellow." This phrase went out of popular usage sometime early last century, and even then it was only said by jerks. Anyone saying this now is most likely planning to kill you and sell your organs.*****
Anyone else got any? Send them along! Good evil phrases are so ... gratifying.
Muuaahahahahahaha!
*Why urbane? Because gritty and/or stupid evil phrases are so natural to us Amurricans that it hardly seems necessary to brush up.
** Note: this is probably only true in fiction.
***"Facts" being things I make up right now. What? I'm a writer. What did you expect?
****Also probably only true in fiction. But it still sends chills down the spine, doesn't it?
*****But they'll do it in some ironic, steam-punk kind of way that proves to them their own superiority. Jerks.