Fireball Roberts
Stayed up until 4 in the morning watch My Cousin Vinny and BET uncut. I really like that song with that one guy from Outkat which I can't remember his name. Actually, I don't even think he is from outkast and I always forget what the song is called but its the one with the car wash. I don't like the song alone but the song and music video have really good flow. Kelly Ripa was on Saturday night live, I used to think she was so hot, she was on my top 3 celebs that I would have no problem forgetting about everything I had going on for but obviously not realistic. I don't know anymore sometimes we just learn things and see things that people are doing or going through that dont change there apperance but they look a lot different to us. Sometimes its better to run the game than the real life there are too many things that are variable in real life, we can control the game and we can win in the game. Played basketball again, I am seriously cooking, though I am a step slower on defense then I want to be and not as strong under the boards. I guess all it took was one good elbow in the face to get nervous that I am going to get hit everytime under the boards. Just seems like so much goes on but nothing really happens and in the end we all come back to ourselves again just because people come and go and sometimes they take what they need and go or sometimes they get close to what they need are afraid and go. If you think its easy doing one night stands try playing in a rock and roll band. I don't see me and my brothers getting along too much after we all get out of the house and start working. I don't know there are just too many factors that really make us different, there are too many things that we have been through. I see Danni moving away probably with Josh, which i think is weird. I mean as far as I know she is his only serious girl friend can one really get through life with one serious person or will they always wonder what else could I have. Sometimes when we get in a possition where we are completely content we mess everything up by considering, thinking and analyzing. Don't get me wrong it is important to think and analyze but when we do it with our head we seem to always complicate things to the point that we don't understand them. Don't trust your mind it is full of holes the most beautiful prizes always slip through. Someone told me today that they were giving up on me, just out of the fucking blue, like someone that I really don't talk to anyway. I know he's a schemer and I know how he likes to tease and trick people and I can see right through it. People are weak these days and sometimes when we fully understand we know too much and sometimes when we know enough we know too much and its hard to live in this world knowing that. When we understand its hard to live with these people here, when we know what is meant by "life is precious" then its hard to put on a good face for a lot of people that just take it for granted. If someone was to put on a good face even if they were truely not happy then it would probably expend a lot of energy and they would collapse of exhaustion. Maybe that explains why I am so tired.
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