(no subject)
okay, so i put too much pressure on myself.
i'm starting to go mental about my 'path.' it's ridiculous.
how can i be inspired, if i don't allow myself the space?
it's difficult because i want to be done and move on but i also need to feed my intellect. i have to figure out what i want to say before i can say it, let alone well.
this may be just a part of my life but it is just that and i owe it my full attention. i can't just expect to coast through without effort. i can't expect to just slide through the rest of my degree to get it done and find something else to do with my life. this is the choice i have made for myself. i owe it to myself to try and make it work. right?
derr puts things in perspective. what's frustrating me is that i take what i make so seriously. like it has to mean so much, it has to be this part of a bigger illustration, when really i should be using this time to dabble.
this is true, but i don't know that i can be inspired any other way. that's how i've always worked.
he tells me to take the most irrational idea and follow it out rationally (that is a quote from sol lewitt)
this is supposed to inspire me.
i'm confused by everything these days.
i think i might take a vow of celibacy. for forty days. no sex or sweets. i need a sexual cleanse. and the sweets thing will just be an added challenge.
i wonder if i can make it. if i isolate the one major area of influence for my work, what will happen? will i find something new or perish? oooooo....risks, yes.
i'm starting to go mental about my 'path.' it's ridiculous.
how can i be inspired, if i don't allow myself the space?
it's difficult because i want to be done and move on but i also need to feed my intellect. i have to figure out what i want to say before i can say it, let alone well.
this may be just a part of my life but it is just that and i owe it my full attention. i can't just expect to coast through without effort. i can't expect to just slide through the rest of my degree to get it done and find something else to do with my life. this is the choice i have made for myself. i owe it to myself to try and make it work. right?
derr puts things in perspective. what's frustrating me is that i take what i make so seriously. like it has to mean so much, it has to be this part of a bigger illustration, when really i should be using this time to dabble.
this is true, but i don't know that i can be inspired any other way. that's how i've always worked.
he tells me to take the most irrational idea and follow it out rationally (that is a quote from sol lewitt)
this is supposed to inspire me.
i'm confused by everything these days.
i think i might take a vow of celibacy. for forty days. no sex or sweets. i need a sexual cleanse. and the sweets thing will just be an added challenge.
i wonder if i can make it. if i isolate the one major area of influence for my work, what will happen? will i find something new or perish? oooooo....risks, yes.