Meeting Jimmy Carr
Well this is hopefully going to be a short entry about the things that I remember from my TOTALLY AWESOME night watching ‘Jimmy Carr’ and getting to meet him afterwards!! :D :D :D
Well I had decided that I would see two shows on Sunday, for whatever silly reason (after my day out in Glasgow, I was pretty fucking beat!) but I’m glad I did. The first show was called the Showcase Scottish Dance, and it was really lovely! The dancing was quite different - very provocative and … fluid? I can’t really describe it, but the outfits were kind of weird, the guy’s looked like they were in straight jackets with a bunch of strings all over the outfits - the effect looked a little like waving tentacles when they danced. The women’s puffy dresses looked like flowing water or something when they would run about and be lifted up and carried during the performance. It was just generally quite lovely, and I felt really bad for falling half-asleep throughout the whole thing. The show only went for 40 minutes (I thought it was an hour! D:) and I guess because I was poorly, the energy spent trying to find the place kind of caught up with me and all I wanted to do was sleep. DX
In any case, afterwards I went and got some chocolate, cream filled éclairs from Sainsbury’s as I tried to amuse myself until Jimmy Carr started. I also went and saw Greyfrairs Bobby and visited the church that he is buried at. LOL @ the sign saying ‘the wee loyal dog was buried near his owner as a sign of respect’ when the two graves were at least 10m apart!! XDDD fail at geography, methinks.
So back to Jimmy Carr. I somehow managed to fluke getting one of the best seats in the house - I didn’t even know that the seats were numbered! But I had seat C26 or something, which was pretty much dead centre of the 5th row. So I was right up close but without being in the ‘firing range’ if Jimmy decided to begin making fun of the audience members sitting there. The show didn’t start all that late, so that was good … though there were a few empty seats up the back!
He started the show with a slide show, which was kind of different. He had us (like monkeys) say whatever was ‘red’ coloured, so you know, of course he had to have some practise rounds. That was kinda amusing, because he insulted some people and had us insult ourselves, LOL. He included the ‘rules’ in this read out, before telling us that after he tells a joke, we would have to laugh. So he did a ‘couple of practise ones’ and the awesomest thing about that was when someone yelled out ‘laugh’ instead of actually laughing. xD;
Then he came out and told a bunch of short, punch line jokes. I was kind of surprised, because I thought he would be a little bit more like Rich Hall in that he would tell funny stories, more so than actual two line jokes. But they were funny, and many of them were questionable in their subject (rape jokes, sex jokes, homophobic jokes, homosexual jokes … you get the picture).
After about 10 minutes of that (possibly less, I’m not really sure), he stopped that and switched over to talking and interacting with the audience. That was quite fun, but then he started using the power point video display thing to “show us a little about what goes about in his mind”. It was uberlulzy and full of rape!humour, butt!humour and underaged!girlfriend humour. XDD;; I don’t know if he drew the cartoons himself, but they were quite amusing. My favourite was possibly the ‘Opinions’ Jimmy Carr cartoon. ^-^;;
Anyway, skip through LOL worthy jokes that lasted a long time - longer than I had expected! I didn’t realise the show went for 80mins, I thought it was only an hour (not complaining though!). He had a couch and a desk that he utilised (the desk was for the power point, and the couch he sat on while he … did some kind of monologue. It was funny at the time, coz I’m weird and find it funny when guy’s suit pants ride up and their thin legs look ridiculous. XD;;
At the end of the show he told everyone that if they wanted to get their tickets or programmes signed, he would be in the lobby. I was like SQUEE and made sure to stay round, but of course I went off to the toilet only to come back and find this MONSTER FUCKING LINE that seemed to go forever with all the people that were getting things signed. I decided to join at the end anyway - I was there, might as well see it through. We were told several times that we weren’t allowed to pose for pictures, because there wasn’t time. If we wanted a picture with Jimmy we would have to get someone else to take a picture while we were getting our stuff signed.
So I was like ‘fuck …’ but didn’t really care too much. I asked the nice people behind me to take my photo while I got my ticket and a pamphlet signed, which they kindly did. I was in shock though, because he was SO FUCKING NICE. I don’t know why I expected anything else, but it was really disconcerting when he spoke with me. I put my stuff on the table kinda intimidated like and shyly asked if he could please sign them. He was like ‘SURE!’ and ‘nice glasses’ and I was like *shucks* “aww, thanks. I’m dyslexic so that’s why …” and then he was off! He immediately was like “oh really? How bout that, I’m dyslexic too. You know you can get … [insert him talking about audio help things for dyslexics] because you know that it’s much easier for a dyslexic to learn things with audio than visually.” [Sme’s note: not quite Jimmy, but never mind]. I nodded and agreed and was totally gobsmacked and couldn’t think of anything more intelligent to say other than ‘oh right? Well I’ll definitely have to check that out. Thank you’ DX WHY DO I FAIL SO HARD? *dies from shame*
BUT WHO CARES? I HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON WITH JIMMY CARR. AND HE WAS NICE ENOUGH TO TRY TO HELP ME OUT WITH IT. OMG I THINK I HAVE A NEW CELEB CRUSH.
Ohohoh, and the most amusing thing (I found, coz I’m retarded) was when, right at the end of our ‘talk’ he said “you know more people have dyslexia than you realise”. I resisted the urge to shout out “I KNOW!!!!” super excited like, because I know quite a few people now that have it. LOL I was actually thinking, at the time, that I would never have thought that Jimmy was dyslexic, because of whatever job he had before. And look! This lovely comic is dyslexic, and I would never have known if he hadn’t told me! *feels so special*
So I left in a SUPER UBER FUCKING FANTASTIC MOOD and had to walk all the way home. DX BUT I DON’T EVEN CARE. I MET JIMMY FUCKING CARR AND HE WAS FUNNY AND HE WAS AWESOME AND HE WAS NICE!! SO FUCKING YAY ME.
WOOT WOOT.
Well I had decided that I would see two shows on Sunday, for whatever silly reason (after my day out in Glasgow, I was pretty fucking beat!) but I’m glad I did. The first show was called the Showcase Scottish Dance, and it was really lovely! The dancing was quite different - very provocative and … fluid? I can’t really describe it, but the outfits were kind of weird, the guy’s looked like they were in straight jackets with a bunch of strings all over the outfits - the effect looked a little like waving tentacles when they danced. The women’s puffy dresses looked like flowing water or something when they would run about and be lifted up and carried during the performance. It was just generally quite lovely, and I felt really bad for falling half-asleep throughout the whole thing. The show only went for 40 minutes (I thought it was an hour! D:) and I guess because I was poorly, the energy spent trying to find the place kind of caught up with me and all I wanted to do was sleep. DX
In any case, afterwards I went and got some chocolate, cream filled éclairs from Sainsbury’s as I tried to amuse myself until Jimmy Carr started. I also went and saw Greyfrairs Bobby and visited the church that he is buried at. LOL @ the sign saying ‘the wee loyal dog was buried near his owner as a sign of respect’ when the two graves were at least 10m apart!! XDDD fail at geography, methinks.
So back to Jimmy Carr. I somehow managed to fluke getting one of the best seats in the house - I didn’t even know that the seats were numbered! But I had seat C26 or something, which was pretty much dead centre of the 5th row. So I was right up close but without being in the ‘firing range’ if Jimmy decided to begin making fun of the audience members sitting there. The show didn’t start all that late, so that was good … though there were a few empty seats up the back!
He started the show with a slide show, which was kind of different. He had us (like monkeys) say whatever was ‘red’ coloured, so you know, of course he had to have some practise rounds. That was kinda amusing, because he insulted some people and had us insult ourselves, LOL. He included the ‘rules’ in this read out, before telling us that after he tells a joke, we would have to laugh. So he did a ‘couple of practise ones’ and the awesomest thing about that was when someone yelled out ‘laugh’ instead of actually laughing. xD;
Then he came out and told a bunch of short, punch line jokes. I was kind of surprised, because I thought he would be a little bit more like Rich Hall in that he would tell funny stories, more so than actual two line jokes. But they were funny, and many of them were questionable in their subject (rape jokes, sex jokes, homophobic jokes, homosexual jokes … you get the picture).
After about 10 minutes of that (possibly less, I’m not really sure), he stopped that and switched over to talking and interacting with the audience. That was quite fun, but then he started using the power point video display thing to “show us a little about what goes about in his mind”. It was uberlulzy and full of rape!humour, butt!humour and underaged!girlfriend humour. XDD;; I don’t know if he drew the cartoons himself, but they were quite amusing. My favourite was possibly the ‘Opinions’ Jimmy Carr cartoon. ^-^;;
Anyway, skip through LOL worthy jokes that lasted a long time - longer than I had expected! I didn’t realise the show went for 80mins, I thought it was only an hour (not complaining though!). He had a couch and a desk that he utilised (the desk was for the power point, and the couch he sat on while he … did some kind of monologue. It was funny at the time, coz I’m weird and find it funny when guy’s suit pants ride up and their thin legs look ridiculous. XD;;
At the end of the show he told everyone that if they wanted to get their tickets or programmes signed, he would be in the lobby. I was like SQUEE and made sure to stay round, but of course I went off to the toilet only to come back and find this MONSTER FUCKING LINE that seemed to go forever with all the people that were getting things signed. I decided to join at the end anyway - I was there, might as well see it through. We were told several times that we weren’t allowed to pose for pictures, because there wasn’t time. If we wanted a picture with Jimmy we would have to get someone else to take a picture while we were getting our stuff signed.
So I was like ‘fuck …’ but didn’t really care too much. I asked the nice people behind me to take my photo while I got my ticket and a pamphlet signed, which they kindly did. I was in shock though, because he was SO FUCKING NICE. I don’t know why I expected anything else, but it was really disconcerting when he spoke with me. I put my stuff on the table kinda intimidated like and shyly asked if he could please sign them. He was like ‘SURE!’ and ‘nice glasses’ and I was like *shucks* “aww, thanks. I’m dyslexic so that’s why …” and then he was off! He immediately was like “oh really? How bout that, I’m dyslexic too. You know you can get … [insert him talking about audio help things for dyslexics] because you know that it’s much easier for a dyslexic to learn things with audio than visually.” [Sme’s note: not quite Jimmy, but never mind]. I nodded and agreed and was totally gobsmacked and couldn’t think of anything more intelligent to say other than ‘oh right? Well I’ll definitely have to check that out. Thank you’ DX WHY DO I FAIL SO HARD? *dies from shame*
BUT WHO CARES? I HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON WITH JIMMY CARR. AND HE WAS NICE ENOUGH TO TRY TO HELP ME OUT WITH IT. OMG I THINK I HAVE A NEW CELEB CRUSH.
Ohohoh, and the most amusing thing (I found, coz I’m retarded) was when, right at the end of our ‘talk’ he said “you know more people have dyslexia than you realise”. I resisted the urge to shout out “I KNOW!!!!” super excited like, because I know quite a few people now that have it. LOL I was actually thinking, at the time, that I would never have thought that Jimmy was dyslexic, because of whatever job he had before. And look! This lovely comic is dyslexic, and I would never have known if he hadn’t told me! *feels so special*
So I left in a SUPER UBER FUCKING FANTASTIC MOOD and had to walk all the way home. DX BUT I DON’T EVEN CARE. I MET JIMMY FUCKING CARR AND HE WAS FUNNY AND HE WAS AWESOME AND HE WAS NICE!! SO FUCKING YAY ME.
WOOT WOOT.