(no subject)
this place. somehow I think that this place makes people crazy. or maybe its that the people make this place crazy. its hard to tell.
people complain that there is to much homework, but I havent really noticed that. people say that its really hard here, but seriously, its just hard because people think that they need to get As and they need to do all the homework and people here seem to lose sight of what college is about-learning. we are here to learn, not maintain a gpa. I think that a lot of people are here because they didnt get into the ivy league they were hoping for and they heard this school had a pretty good reputation. PEOPLE! LIFE IS NOT ABOUT YOUR REPUTATION!!!! I wish that I had known a little more about what the atmosphere of this school really is before I got here, because I would not have come. I can't understand how my brother managed to not notice all the people going insane. is this just the worste year that Kalamazoo has ever seen? why is depression such a huge problem here? I feel ansy here all the time, like in highschool when I was just so excited to get out of town. I just want to leave, and I dont care where I go. the overlit dorm is killing me slowly. I feel like I'm just going through the motions, like I'm not real. like I don't have really exciting days where I just have a lot of fun in a class, or anytime for that matter. I remember going to classes in highschool and just being delighted by the subject, or the teacher, or another kid in the class. people here who actually tlak to me in class basically ignore me outside of class, and somehow I feel like I am the outcast of the entire school. like everyone has tons of friends and they can just pop on over to thier dorm and study or eat ice cream or do whatever. I want to want to be here so much, because I AM here, but I dont.
People keep saying that a student center is what we need. a bowling ally, some pool tables, a snack bar... as though if we had that then the entire school would suddenly be buzzing with excitement. yeah right! the mentality here blows.
and I hate that even when there are things on campus that seem cool I don't go because I don't have anyone to go with. this is the first time in my life I have been scared to go somewhere alone. I have always been so proud of the fact that I just do things, even if no one else wants to. but now somehow its to embarassing for me.
OK, thats my complaining, and now I'm going to just pretend like I love it here and do jumping jacks or somehting REALLY fun.
people complain that there is to much homework, but I havent really noticed that. people say that its really hard here, but seriously, its just hard because people think that they need to get As and they need to do all the homework and people here seem to lose sight of what college is about-learning. we are here to learn, not maintain a gpa. I think that a lot of people are here because they didnt get into the ivy league they were hoping for and they heard this school had a pretty good reputation. PEOPLE! LIFE IS NOT ABOUT YOUR REPUTATION!!!! I wish that I had known a little more about what the atmosphere of this school really is before I got here, because I would not have come. I can't understand how my brother managed to not notice all the people going insane. is this just the worste year that Kalamazoo has ever seen? why is depression such a huge problem here? I feel ansy here all the time, like in highschool when I was just so excited to get out of town. I just want to leave, and I dont care where I go. the overlit dorm is killing me slowly. I feel like I'm just going through the motions, like I'm not real. like I don't have really exciting days where I just have a lot of fun in a class, or anytime for that matter. I remember going to classes in highschool and just being delighted by the subject, or the teacher, or another kid in the class. people here who actually tlak to me in class basically ignore me outside of class, and somehow I feel like I am the outcast of the entire school. like everyone has tons of friends and they can just pop on over to thier dorm and study or eat ice cream or do whatever. I want to want to be here so much, because I AM here, but I dont.
People keep saying that a student center is what we need. a bowling ally, some pool tables, a snack bar... as though if we had that then the entire school would suddenly be buzzing with excitement. yeah right! the mentality here blows.
and I hate that even when there are things on campus that seem cool I don't go because I don't have anyone to go with. this is the first time in my life I have been scared to go somewhere alone. I have always been so proud of the fact that I just do things, even if no one else wants to. but now somehow its to embarassing for me.
OK, thats my complaining, and now I'm going to just pretend like I love it here and do jumping jacks or somehting REALLY fun.