Christmas Break Update
So sorry I have not updated in a while. Things were CRAZY at the end of the semester and over break all I did was sleep, lol. I hope everyone had a very merry Christmas, and a happy new year!
I cannot believe that I go back to school tomorrow! I have always worked on campus over intersession since I live close, but I never took an intersession class and stayed on campus. I was really excited about it at first because I am graduating and I wanted all of the Scranton time I could get. However, now that I am getting ready to leave my family and go back I am starting to think this is a bad idea. I always loved being home over intersession, and the thought of moving back into my apartment tomorrow makes me homesick already. You are probably laughing at me right now because I live so close to school, but I can honestly tell you that I barely see my family or go home when I am at school. I know people who are from another states who go home and see their families more than I do. Theatre majors are very busy people! I am also really upset because I realized that in a few months everything is about to change and my life will never be the same. I am graduating in May, which means that it is time for me to really become an adult. My 4 years at Scranton were the greatest 4 years of my life, and it upsets me that my Scranton days are numbered and almost over. I know this is all part of growing up, and I accept that, but it is still hard to go through. Not only will my Scranton life be turned upside down, but my life at home will be as well. Most of my friends from home will be graduating and finding jobs and possibly moving away. I can accept the growing up and taking on the responsibility of a job and all, but I hate accepting the fact that people I love and care about will be leaving my life soon.
Okay, enough of that......
Christmas was lovely. The house has never been more elegantly decorated! My mom was really sick so I did not see much of my family on Christmas Ever or Christmas Day, but I still had a lovely holiday. Midnight mass was beautiful as always, and I thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it. Santa was more than good to me and gave me beautiful clothes, shoes, jewelry, and an iPod (just to name a few of my MANY gifts). I think Santa was a little too good to me, but I am very grateful for all I was given. I was able to spend a little bit of time with Abby, which made me super happy because I miss her terribly when she is not around. New Year's Eve was a lot of fun. Things got a little screwed up, and I did not get to see some of my favorite ladies who were having a fabulous party on Taylor Ave. I also did not get to see Ethan, but I did spend the night at Tinks with my Ana. Speaking of Ana, much congrads to her on graduating a semester early, kicking ass on her LSATS, and getting accepted with a scholarship to 1 law school already! I know you will get into all of the other schools you applied to sweetie! I wish my Janel was with me on New Year's Ever, but I guess even best friends have to spend some holidays apart.
Tonight I cried for 3 and 1/2 hours. Well, I didn't really cry for that long because I don't cry all that much and when I do it is only for a few minutes. I did lay in bed feeling horribly depressed though. I was just thinking about a lot of things, and trying to make sense of all of the bad things that have happened lately. I am much better now though! I really got upset because for the first time in my life I wished I had never met someone. If you know me at all you know that I believe that everything happens for a reason. I also believe that the people who hurt us in life make us stronger and better people. Although I do not like some people, I have never really wished I had never met them. The person I wish I never met is someone who I love a great deal. I wish I never met him because if I never met him I would not have fallen in love with him. To me he is perfect. I know he has faults, but in my eyes all of his faults make him even more perfect. (I am sure that sounds crazy) I just hate what it feels like to miss him. I hate it that I barely see him because he is so far away. I hate knowing that he is going on with his life and spending time with "lady friends." I just think I would be better off not knowing him. I guess what I hate the most is that he has no idea I feel this way about him and I do not know if I will ever tell him. there is no use trying to forget him because it is not going to happen. I am just going to keep on doing what I have been doing for the past year and a half, and maybe, without hope or agenda, one day I will tell him.
Okay now that I am done sounding crazy I am going to wrap up this entry. Tomorrow I am going to mass and brunch with the family. I need to finish packing and go to the grocery store. Then I am moving back in and unpacking tons and tons of stuff. U get to see Dee, Mulhern, and C. RYAN tomorrow! Hopefully I will also see Kyle and Janel and a few other special people. Maybe tomorrow I will write a funny entry about me and the homeless people, or crazy Jose.
I cannot believe that I go back to school tomorrow! I have always worked on campus over intersession since I live close, but I never took an intersession class and stayed on campus. I was really excited about it at first because I am graduating and I wanted all of the Scranton time I could get. However, now that I am getting ready to leave my family and go back I am starting to think this is a bad idea. I always loved being home over intersession, and the thought of moving back into my apartment tomorrow makes me homesick already. You are probably laughing at me right now because I live so close to school, but I can honestly tell you that I barely see my family or go home when I am at school. I know people who are from another states who go home and see their families more than I do. Theatre majors are very busy people! I am also really upset because I realized that in a few months everything is about to change and my life will never be the same. I am graduating in May, which means that it is time for me to really become an adult. My 4 years at Scranton were the greatest 4 years of my life, and it upsets me that my Scranton days are numbered and almost over. I know this is all part of growing up, and I accept that, but it is still hard to go through. Not only will my Scranton life be turned upside down, but my life at home will be as well. Most of my friends from home will be graduating and finding jobs and possibly moving away. I can accept the growing up and taking on the responsibility of a job and all, but I hate accepting the fact that people I love and care about will be leaving my life soon.
Okay, enough of that......
Christmas was lovely. The house has never been more elegantly decorated! My mom was really sick so I did not see much of my family on Christmas Ever or Christmas Day, but I still had a lovely holiday. Midnight mass was beautiful as always, and I thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it. Santa was more than good to me and gave me beautiful clothes, shoes, jewelry, and an iPod (just to name a few of my MANY gifts). I think Santa was a little too good to me, but I am very grateful for all I was given. I was able to spend a little bit of time with Abby, which made me super happy because I miss her terribly when she is not around. New Year's Eve was a lot of fun. Things got a little screwed up, and I did not get to see some of my favorite ladies who were having a fabulous party on Taylor Ave. I also did not get to see Ethan, but I did spend the night at Tinks with my Ana. Speaking of Ana, much congrads to her on graduating a semester early, kicking ass on her LSATS, and getting accepted with a scholarship to 1 law school already! I know you will get into all of the other schools you applied to sweetie! I wish my Janel was with me on New Year's Ever, but I guess even best friends have to spend some holidays apart.
Tonight I cried for 3 and 1/2 hours. Well, I didn't really cry for that long because I don't cry all that much and when I do it is only for a few minutes. I did lay in bed feeling horribly depressed though. I was just thinking about a lot of things, and trying to make sense of all of the bad things that have happened lately. I am much better now though! I really got upset because for the first time in my life I wished I had never met someone. If you know me at all you know that I believe that everything happens for a reason. I also believe that the people who hurt us in life make us stronger and better people. Although I do not like some people, I have never really wished I had never met them. The person I wish I never met is someone who I love a great deal. I wish I never met him because if I never met him I would not have fallen in love with him. To me he is perfect. I know he has faults, but in my eyes all of his faults make him even more perfect. (I am sure that sounds crazy) I just hate what it feels like to miss him. I hate it that I barely see him because he is so far away. I hate knowing that he is going on with his life and spending time with "lady friends." I just think I would be better off not knowing him. I guess what I hate the most is that he has no idea I feel this way about him and I do not know if I will ever tell him. there is no use trying to forget him because it is not going to happen. I am just going to keep on doing what I have been doing for the past year and a half, and maybe, without hope or agenda, one day I will tell him.
Okay now that I am done sounding crazy I am going to wrap up this entry. Tomorrow I am going to mass and brunch with the family. I need to finish packing and go to the grocery store. Then I am moving back in and unpacking tons and tons of stuff. U get to see Dee, Mulhern, and C. RYAN tomorrow! Hopefully I will also see Kyle and Janel and a few other special people. Maybe tomorrow I will write a funny entry about me and the homeless people, or crazy Jose.