Chievo Spam
(OMG YAY!)
It's amazing how much better three points can make a boring, unimpressive game, huh? Suddenly, it really doesn't matter that Fiorentina didn't do much, cos not only did they win, but they beat a team way above them in the table (which was mercifully without Pellissier)! Plus, Artur didn't screw up too much on his Serie A debut, and Cerci stopped sucking and getting booed, and scored his first Serie A goal EVAR to get the purple people the proverbial W. WOO HOO!
FIORENTINA 1-0 CHIEVO VERONA [highlights|pagelle: Gazzetta, CF|ratings table]
Marcatori: Cerci al 35’ st
Fiorentina: Boruc Comotto Kroldrup Gamberini Pasqual Bolatti (Vargas dal 1’st) Donadel Marchionni (Cerci dal 27’ st) Mutu Santana Gilardino (Gulan dal 41’ st). All. Mihajlovic
Chievo Verona: Sorrentino Frey (Mandelli dal 3’ st) Andreolli (Jokic dal 30’ st) Cesar Mantovani Bentivoglio (Rigoni dal 25’ st) Guana Marcolini Constant Moscardelli Thereau.
Because it's basically required for fans to complain cleverly at lunchtime matches right now, the purple tifosi did their part.
What are the odds the FIGC cares, even a little? Yeah. The thought is admirable, though.
And, rather that balloons, the curva waves paper plates before the match. Chortle, chortle.
ADV was tired but, with the help of several alarm clocks, he got up early and made it to the match on time.
Monty and the Playmate were up in the tribuna, as well, but I seem to have to missed/lost all the pictures of them. Probably safe to assume she had a stuffed animal with her, though.
It's also possible there were no pictures of Monty because all 12 photographers were obsessing over Sinisa's every step.
You think I'm kidding?
I assure you, I am not.
Do you think he has like four sweaters that look just like that?
Or is it the same one, every single game day? Will he have time to get it back from the dry cleaner before Wednesday's match?
(Worrying about his dry cleaning.)
... It looks like Comotto is a morning person.
Krol, on the other hand, definitely is not.
Mutu, meanwhile, just likes when people cheer him.
He's pretty easy to please.
(Santana just saw his wife. AW.)
Gila: *token pregame affection*
Mutu: *basks*
LOOK EVERYONE, ARTUR! HE SHAVED! AND CUT HIS HAIR! \o/
He was frighteningly casual and, despite the what's suggested by that blog Cheryl loves so much, totally unwilling to yell at anyone, but it all worked out ok.
Cos he really didn't have much to do and, despite some weird moments involving trying to kicking the ball, responded when he was called upon.
Including a late, important saved when his teammates were, as usual, trying their level best to give the game away.
While the photo guys were paying attention to Artur, Sinisa ran over and stole a cuddle with the Chievo coach. Much to the disapproval of, well, pretty much everyone.
The key to Comotto finally being established in the team: Emulating LDS's tongue technique.
Or, possibly, not. However it happens, though, he's still doing fine -- smart, ruthless, willing to hack people when he needs to. Whatever works, man.
And, look, his prettiness is coming back! (Quiet back there, haters.)
Next to Comotto, Gambero had his determined face on.
I hesitate to praise him, cos last time it led to another collapse, but he was pretty much untroubled all match, apart from looking pointy and cold.
Next to Gambit, Krol was judging the hell out of his need for base layers, just cos of a little rain.
And, because Krol can multitask, he was also running the defense and keeping Artur safe from harm.
Oh, and he also almost scored off a first half corner. Krol can pretty much do anything.
Sinisa: "ALMOST. Grump, grump."
Pasqual galloped around on the left, as usual.
If I remember correctly, Chievo's two best second half chances came from his side, but since they didn't score on either of them, I guess it's ... all good?
Erm. Or not.
Speaking of not all good, Bolatti started in Monty's place and was reliably awful.
I feel sorta bad hating on him cos Juve fans did that to Melo last season, and he's showing them now how wrong they were, but WHEN IS HE GOING TO SHOW US WE'RE WRONG???
We'll be right here, Bolatti. Any time you want to start proving us wrong, we will be eager to see it. Thank you.
Bolatti was mercifully replaced at halftime by this guy.
The obvious assumption was that Bolatti's fail was the reason, but it turns out the Argie had gotten hit in the head during the first half and was having trouble seeing. Oh dear.
So JMV's arrival was actually a mission of mercy, both for Bolatti and for the rest of the team.
(Skipping to the rescue.)
Cos, even though he's still not fit in and his hair is still troubling, he made a huge, huge difference when he came on.
And not just in the junk department.
When JMV turns up, other teams suddenly have to deal with pace and strength down the left and, even more importantly, with cross after cross coming into the box.
Additionally, when you add him to Gila and Mutu, even when they're not all on form, they're unpredictable and difficult to defend.
Sinisa: "My god, it's possible we're not complete shit after all!"
What up, Capitano?
Donadel: "Not much, just having a little Flying Donkey for lunch. You know how it goes."
Donadel did what he do, running his ass off, winning balls, and generally showing why he deserves to be Mr. Vice-Captain.
The fans apparently applauded him like crazy, both throughout the match and afterward, which must be an amazing feeling for a guy everyone figured was on his way out in August.
Speaking of the formerly unloved.
Actually, Mario Alberto is still probably little loved (Fools!), but it'd be hard to find anyone who would argue that he's not hugely important to La Viola.
Not to mention TOTALLY ADORABLE.
The fact the he can play basically anywhere but in the back is huge -- he started on the wing yesterday, then dropped into the middle when JMV replaced Bolatti.
Gazzetta actually thought he was better in the middle, which is basically a brand new position for him time season.
He may be playing a new position, but he's still the same old Santana, missing easy chances and then getting all down on himself and depressed afterward.
Sini: *judges harshly*
Offscreen!Santana: *slouches even more than usual*
He recovered, though, don't worry. Moving into the middle was probably useful for him, actually, cos it kept him away from the goal, where he'd probably have been worrying about his own fail.
Mighty Marco started opposite Santana, out on the left where he'd rather not be.
And he really didn't do very much.
TBH, it was easy to completely forget he was on the pitch, and his day look even worse when he was replaced by Cerci, who played a great 20 minutes.
Poverino just looks exhausted. *pat pat*
Mutu doesn't look tired.
But, after a nine-month vacation, he damn well better not.
Guana: *creep, creep*
He was certainly better than he'd been against Catania, when he only played for about 20 minutes and then mostly watched.
Yesterday, he seemed more consistently involved, and was trying to play quicker than he did in Sicily.
Ooooh, such urgency!
Anyone who says he's transforming the team is nuts at this point, but he and Gila have an understanding, and his ability to beat people with the ball at his feet is huge.
Not that he's doing it regularly yet, but still -- he can do it, which is something Fiorentina are sorely lacking in these Jojo-less times.
Ditto on the free kick front, too. Adem and JMV have skillz in that area, but Mutu's got experience, guile, and a much longer track record.
The crotch, of course, came back instantly. Some things, you never lose track of.
And, holy crap -- defending! Badly and violently, but still. Effort!
Guana: *creeps some more*
(There are a billion pictures of him, and not a billion things to say. If you'd not noticed, I'm a bit at a loss here.)
He may be an annoying, entitled jerk, but he does seem to care (though he shows it in very odd, suspension-laden ways), and being on the pitch obviously means a lot to him.
It's the little things that he missed, you know?
The being creeped by opposing balds.
The Gormless Face contests.
The howls of utter agony.
The need to tolerate terrible, unjust mistreatment at the hand of opponents.
(Ok, I'm sorry I keep talking about Guana, but damn. And a ginger, too!)
Sinisa: *broods on principle*
Gila isn't actually making this face on purpose.
Everything's fine, but he's stuck this way.
(It's probably Bolatti's fault.)
And, to make matters worse, his lower leg seems to have broken without him noticing. Either that, or he's wearing about eight shin guard on that side.
At least it's not bothering him, I guess?
Sinisa is totally starting to panic in spite of himself. Mutu can't score, Gila keeps giving the ball away, Jojo's still months away, and JMV's hair is too short to be decisive.
Sini: "MORE HAIR! SOMEONE, FIND ME MORE HAIR!"
Cerci: "Did somebody say 'more hair'?"
His Hairness was booed when he entered the pitch then, less than five minutes later, was the hero.
In addition to his goal, he also created another great chance a few minutes later, but he put his shot off the post. He was sad, afroed panda.
But, look: Emerging crotch issues! This bodes well indeed for his Viola!future.
So, his goal.
Mutu and Gila played a give-and-go, and Mutu played a cross in to Gila.
With his shin guard/broken leg flopping around and his shirt being torn from his body, Gila managed to touch the ball toward goal, and forced the keeper to deal with it.
He did, but only well enough to deflect it into Cerci's path. Goal.
Coaches: "PRAISE JESUS." (Or, alternately, Sinisa was trying to eat the fourth official and the Commie-looking assistant barely caught him in time. Choose your own interpretation.)
And, lo -- Cerci's first career Serie A prance was on.
Plz note the lack of shushing of the people who whistled him, or the pointing at his name, or other signs of how very important he is.
He was just absolutely over the moon with pure, unadulterated joy.
Aw. So cute, and yet so very scary.
... And I ain't just talking about Cerci, either. Wow.
I read somewhere recently that, despite being ... well, him, Mutu is nevertheless really popular with and fond of his teammates. This whole celebration seems to strongly confirm that statement.
I mean, look at this! They're all cuddling Mutu, who may or many not have cried after the match, he feels this shit so deeply.
Aw, Krol. Always there to make sure no one gets cuddling to death. He needs to go on the vice-, vice- captain list, for that reason alone.
Before anyone even asks, Comotto is pointing out his hair twin, not giving him the thumbs down. Yes, I'm sure.
After the final whistle, the Commie assistant was delighted, both by the result and by the fact that the fourth official survived the match.
And Mutu loved everybody.
Even Artur.
And Comotto, but who doesn't love Comotto?
Wait, who the hell is that?
I thought the only hot assistant was Cesare's son, but he's gone to Parma. WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?
Aw.
Awwwwwwww!
Artur: *averts his eyes from the gross affection*
Artur doesn't need anybody, see.
In fact, he thinks hugs are stupid. STUPID!
Artur: *melts*
Sini: *moves on to the temp Captain*
Even with all the hugging, though, Sinisa clearly does not approve of what Pasqual is trying to do with Baby Serb #1.
Or maybe it's Krol he's worried about? He seems to think the entire defense is after Gulan. Has he ever actually looked at Gulan? No offense or anything, but this alleged threat is hard to believe.
Up next is a midweek trip to Rome. Fun, fun, fun.