(no subject)
i feel so conflicted...
i mean i am so confused and through that have become depressed...
which also makes me feel ungrateful and like i just need to suck it up and stop pitying myself...
i am lonely...but...there are so many people who have no one...and i have a whole family that loves me...
i find myself trying to focus on other things and to find distractions...working out,for me, is a big distraction...because for a while i can think about pushing harder and keeping on going and then later i can think about how i'm sore...both of those times i am not thinking of how screwed up life is...
i wish i could figure it all soon...because i am tired of this...
and i want to feel better...i want to know all of the truth and not just believe because someone tells you that's how it is...i wil be better because i am so tired of being like this...it will change soon...i will make it...
i mean i am so confused and through that have become depressed...
which also makes me feel ungrateful and like i just need to suck it up and stop pitying myself...
i am lonely...but...there are so many people who have no one...and i have a whole family that loves me...
i find myself trying to focus on other things and to find distractions...working out,for me, is a big distraction...because for a while i can think about pushing harder and keeping on going and then later i can think about how i'm sore...both of those times i am not thinking of how screwed up life is...
i wish i could figure it all soon...because i am tired of this...
and i want to feel better...i want to know all of the truth and not just believe because someone tells you that's how it is...i wil be better because i am so tired of being like this...it will change soon...i will make it...