If what comes around goes around, how come I never see it acted out on the people who are constantly hurting me? I sit here and I feel like I do everything for everyone. I always say yes. I know I've bitched about this over and over over the past however many years, but it never changes. Now my sisters are embarrassed of me and I can't even comment ( Read more... )

who knew that today would turn out like today has turned out. I am having what I call a "Dery" day...where you just freak out for not being liked. Freak out and scream and cry. It's what us Dery's do best. I am the type of person that needs the people around me to be happy in order for me to be happy. I like doing things for people. I do everything ( Read more... )

So I've been sitting here in the blue room reading my previous journal entries. Why am I so damn angry all the time? I need to work on that. It's kind of nice just to sit in here and be alone for a while when Mary is out in the living room smoking it up. I don't know how she can smoke that crap every dAY. I'm not gonna lie, I do it every once in a ( Read more... )

Seriously, I am just so done with my dad. AFter reading posts from back in 2004 about how much my dad ticked me off, I'm surprised I still even talk to him. He's living out here now in Fraser, right down Garfield, and he drives me insane. I can't take it anymore!!! HE calls me back to back to back every night after work and talks to me about his ( Read more... )

Why me? Why have I been chosen to live this life? I feel so alone. Is it my fault? I love how my friends go out and they don't even invite us. I love how my sisters scam us out of money. I try to be there for everyone, but no one gives me a chance. No one cares about what I have to say. I am not going to lie, I have been a complete incompetent ( Read more... )

I am a very unusual person. it is hard to control my intense emotions. when i am sad, i am morbid. when i am happy, i am ecstatic. when i am angry, i am furious. there is no in between for me.

It's hard to comprehend how your first love is getting engaged to someone else. How do you contemplate that? I am in love with Mary and I want to be with her for the rest of my life, but to know that Andie is getting engaged is just WOW. Really? I've never felt like this before. I loved Andie with all my heart, through the hard times and the good ( Read more... )

I miss you.

So wow, I haven't updated this thing in a long time. I don't even know where to start. There's been way too much drama lately!!! So let's start with the father. Ok? Be prepared, this is going to be a NOVEL!

I don't think that I have written about this yet, (I even went and checked...). So idk, maybe 2 months ago, my Dad decides to steal my Jeep out ( Read more... )

Is there a point?

Love me.