a million miles away i would keep myself
i applied to san francisco, san jose, and chico state.
i already got accepted to san francisco! yay!
so i know i'm going to be somewhere Fall 2009, which is nice.
work is getting to me, everything about it makes me annoyed sometimes.
i just need to get through the summer, and then i'm gone.
i'll miss my parents though.
after i moved out, and then moved back, i realized how much i missed being home.
two more weeks of school, then i'm out.
then i'm taking a winter class at smc. lame.
you've done so many things to jeopordize us. i don't even need to begin to name them. i feel like we've been together for so long... i've been smitten since i met you, following you around, showing you new things, being so generous with all i have. i've become more and more ambivelant as time goes on. and i've realized all your true flaws that i never noticed before. the ones that no one ever notices until you get really close with another person. and i still love and care, but i hope we end up going to different universities, because i just don't have it in me to leave you. i'm not sad, but i'm not happy either. and your're perfect when it comes to so many things, but you're deeply flawed as well. and those flaws often time make it hard for me to love someone the way i would like to. there has to be something else out there, and if there isn't...well, maybe i'll run into you again a few years down the line.
not to say that i won't be deeply saddened when this time arrives, because i will.
i'm sure sometimes i will wish against it and be so upset.
but when my head is clear, the way is clear.
and clearly, i feel like i give so much to recieve so little in return.
and i was satisfied with that for a long time, but love can't continue on that footing.
i already got accepted to san francisco! yay!
so i know i'm going to be somewhere Fall 2009, which is nice.
work is getting to me, everything about it makes me annoyed sometimes.
i just need to get through the summer, and then i'm gone.
i'll miss my parents though.
after i moved out, and then moved back, i realized how much i missed being home.
two more weeks of school, then i'm out.
then i'm taking a winter class at smc. lame.
you've done so many things to jeopordize us. i don't even need to begin to name them. i feel like we've been together for so long... i've been smitten since i met you, following you around, showing you new things, being so generous with all i have. i've become more and more ambivelant as time goes on. and i've realized all your true flaws that i never noticed before. the ones that no one ever notices until you get really close with another person. and i still love and care, but i hope we end up going to different universities, because i just don't have it in me to leave you. i'm not sad, but i'm not happy either. and your're perfect when it comes to so many things, but you're deeply flawed as well. and those flaws often time make it hard for me to love someone the way i would like to. there has to be something else out there, and if there isn't...well, maybe i'll run into you again a few years down the line.
not to say that i won't be deeply saddened when this time arrives, because i will.
i'm sure sometimes i will wish against it and be so upset.
but when my head is clear, the way is clear.
and clearly, i feel like i give so much to recieve so little in return.
and i was satisfied with that for a long time, but love can't continue on that footing.