dear boy,
for all intensive purposes, we went in on this deal 50/50. neither/both of us are to blame; you physically 'made us one' while i allowed myself to be blinded by passion, lust, and attraction. so we're half-and-half, agreed. then why the fuck does it seem like i'm the only person affected by it at all? not just physically (duh), but emotionally as well. maybe it's because i'm 2500 miles away from home so i don't see it, but i would bet that if i were there, i would still feel the same way.
maybe it's because i'm pregnant and nuts. or maybe my feelings are actually valid on some level. i'm guessing a little bit of both.
i need to be fit into your schedule before you go out of town. i am having our abortion on thursday and you leave friday. somehow i'm managing to fit 'you' into my schedule while i'm out of town, by sleeping constantly and not vacationing. so it would be greatly appreciated if you could pencil me in. we could watch little league baseball practice, or perhaps do something less creepy. we compromised to not get drunk together anymore and i doubt sober hanging out will lead to anything, it never has before and there is no sense as to why it would. especially now.
times are rough for all of us. but you're not the one who wants to puke all the time.
love and laughs,
me
ps i kindly asked best friend's boyfriend to curb you. he's pretty fucked up right now and just might do it.
maybe it's because i'm pregnant and nuts. or maybe my feelings are actually valid on some level. i'm guessing a little bit of both.
i need to be fit into your schedule before you go out of town. i am having our abortion on thursday and you leave friday. somehow i'm managing to fit 'you' into my schedule while i'm out of town, by sleeping constantly and not vacationing. so it would be greatly appreciated if you could pencil me in. we could watch little league baseball practice, or perhaps do something less creepy. we compromised to not get drunk together anymore and i doubt sober hanging out will lead to anything, it never has before and there is no sense as to why it would. especially now.
times are rough for all of us. but you're not the one who wants to puke all the time.
love and laughs,
me
ps i kindly asked best friend's boyfriend to curb you. he's pretty fucked up right now and just might do it.
