No need for reminding …your still all that matters to me.

[forlewis]

I am in a really weird mood tonight. I don’t know whats wrong with me. I feel like crying...but I cant think of a very good reason to cry…except that I don’t have a very good reason to cry. and that makes no sense. And that’s the way things have been lately.
A few specific thoughts are running through my mind right now that I shall try to straighten out into words… even though it may not add up.
I feel it best to start with what im grateful for and end with my fears.
I am thankful for my friends. I couldn’t make it a day with out them. There are three especially that are always there for me. You know who you are…I love you guys.
It is great to have people who i can talk to…and they actually hear me, no matter what I say or don’t say. because there will always be those people will never hear a word..
Sometimes it is much better to avoid doing what you want to do with every fiber in your body because you know its not right in your heart. But my hearts pretty lost these days and its getting harder to follow.
It doesn’t really matter yet anyway.

And of course my worst fear:
What if you decide you don’t want me in your life?