(for nachtegael) Kim Jongin 2.0

[seulpeo]

For: nachtegael

Title: Kim Jongin 2.0
Pairing: Jongin/Suho
Word Count: ~9,000 words
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: excessive use of alcohol as a coping mechanism
Summary: Office AU. Jongin tries to reinvent himself. He's not very successful.
Author's Note: Dear nachtegael, I hope you don't mind I've combined some of your prompts. Thanks to C for checking the first

Comments

[nachtegael]

This is as good as it gets. It’s stupid to want to be something you’re not. And will always be just Jongin, nothing more.” It comes out harsher than he intended to - but Jongin wishes Jongdae would understand certain wounds take time to heal, and some wounds are never meant to heal at all.
--quote of the month.
--#thisisgoingonmymirror<3

"You need to start thinking about a catchier blog title.”
Σ(‘Д’⁕)ահɑԵ’Տ up !? Kim Jongin, future President of the World
14.10.02
Better, Jongdae?
--good job, Jongin <3
--omfg, pls become president of the world so you speak foreign languages at press conferences in dark suits

“So let me get this straight, you’ve got a crush on your boss and you’ve been courting each other through limp hand waves and exchanging laundry tips. Wow, sounds like you two are on fire, when’s the wedding?

--the Sukai ship summary in a nutshell
--I still love your KJD <3

Jongin looks down at his coke and sniffs it. Surely Jongdae lied about the rum/coke ratio in this and Jongin must be way drunker than he thinks because he doesn’t remember confessing the tiny crush he has on Joonmyun.
He also doesn’t remember how he ended up next to the couch, slouched against it with his neck leaning back at an awkward angle. Nor can he explain how it’s past 4am already, or why Jongdae had put in the dvd of The Sound of Music.
--CUUUTE
--lmao

Jongin doesn’t even like that movie.
--It's ok, Jongin-ah, I'll just like it for you <3 *pats his cuteness all over and rubs it into his squishy cheeks with kisses*

“Why are we watching this?”
“You said your crush looks like Captain Von Trapp. Maybe you could take a few cues from Maria to figure out how to get your man. If I remember correctly, you’ll need a guitar and a bunch of kids.”
Jongin decides Kim Jongin 2.0 should never, ever drink again.
--Capt. Von Trapp!Joonmyun -- SCREAMS
--this is hilarious
--LMAO
--L(et)M(e)A(dore)O(ver you and this fic and drunk!Jongin and just everything pls shoot me now)

Σ(‘Д’⁕)ահɑԵ’Տ up !? Kim Jongin, future President of the World
14.10.02
sidoeekme pease tell hmjyubg i dloke hiam o dont darteo do it mpyself?
--wow, drunk!Jongin trying to blog is like sleepdeprived!ren trying to write essays (true story)

“I didn’t know you smoked.”
“Only when I’m drinking.” Jongin can see Joonmyun’s holding a glass of scotch in his other hand.
--fuck, why is that hot. *fans self aggressively with skirt*

"We owned a cabin near Jinyang lake."
--Jinju <3

He probably shouldn’t push his luck, but it’s the first time Joonmyun’s ever mentioned his ex, and Jongin’s masochistic streak is dying to know more about it.
--Jongin...so selfless...so sweet...so caring about others tragic pasts...<333 I"m tearing up here ;;

“For what it’s worth - I don’t think you’re silly.” There’s so much more Jongin wants to say but the alcohol has really started to kick in and he needs to get away from Joonmyun before he voices his thoughts and says something horribly inappropriate (like “Fuck Baekhyun” or “You sentimental, masochistic fool” or “I love you, senpai”). He also needs to find his jacket before his nipples cut two in his shirt.
--SCREAMS
--ok, I had to pause at this point in narrative to copy/past text all my friends
--friend consensus: you are a genius.
--"I love you senpai"......*SCREAMS again*

01.07pm like, i see he could be handsome but he kinda looks like someone just ambushed his behind with a tiny pointy buttplug
01.15pm that doesn’t make any sense and you know nothing and please don’t speak of pointy buttplugs ever again when you are discussing my boss
01.40pm are you sure you’re not just star-struck because senpai is really good at math and you get a math-boner while watching him work
03.15pm im disowning you
--SCREAAAAM

03.18pm i’d like to see you try - i’m in law school now and im coming for your ass
03.20pm are you trying to break some kind of record with the major switches
03.24pm its my life and its now or never
--once again, you live that life, KJD.

[nachtegael]

“But-”
“Fuck, Jongdae, drop it. It’s done,” Jongin snarls. “I’m going to bed.” He doesn’t want to add insult to injury by letting his cousin see him in tears.
--Jonginnie-yah T.T <3 *pats his tears away with a Joonmyun scented hankie and kisses his face*

Jongin blinks when his blanket is pulled back, trying to rub the sleep out of his eyes. There are two tall men standing by his bed. “Se-Sehun? Tao? What are you guys doing here?” he croaks.
“I called them,” Jongdae says as he plops down on Jongin’s bed. “Right after you went to bed. Figured I needed to step in and gather my Council of Gays for you, since you won’t listen to my advice.”
__FCK
__who wrote this
--and how did they know about my messy Taohun feels
--PS Is Sehun legolas? 'cause I'm picturing him as the blond half of the council//fellowship in my head.

Sehun chimes in. “Not quite. I’m afraid my flirting didn’t quite make it across the language barrier. He was busy, too - I think he spent more time sightseeing than studying while he was here. Anyway, I knew he was only going to be here for three months so I.. held back. I could tell he liked me well enough as a friend but I never thought we’d have a chance. Tao’s not a flighty guy. He’d told me about some of his previous boyfriends and I knew he’d never settle for a fling of a few weeks.”
“And you were right,” Tao agrees. “But you never gave me the chance to decide that for myself. He came to see me off at the airport and only then he told me had feelings for me. Such a drama queen.” He reaches for Sehun’s hand. “Still, I’m glad he did. I got on that plane but I came back after Christmas. And I haven’t looked back since.”
--fuuuuck are there any plans for a Taohun spinoff, bc this backstory is amazing as well as Jongdae as well as Joonangelboy as well as Jongin Squishy Kim. <333

“I’m gonna go out on a limb here - you met the guy by accident in a public bathroom, a week later you get the job even though you bombed the interview, out of the blue he starts getting out of his office more, and he doesn’t judge you for your love of manga,” Jongdae explains. “Call me a romantic but I’d say you have a shot.”
--Jongdae: so snippy, yet so insightful <3

"Maybe Joonmyun isn’t the guy for you - but please, don’t let yourself become that guy who’s scared to take a shot at happiness,” Jongdae concludes.
--another quote of the month.
--#thisisalsogoingonmymirror<3

*deep inhale*

Ok, how to even summarize at this point.

+ I love your characters. A lot. Jongin is sweet and shy and is going to grow up so strong.
+ Did I mention yet I love your Jongdae. Snark is love. That is all.
+ ChanSoo office workmates. I also love your Chanyeol who is happy and talented and a great mentor.
+ Minseok. Minseok didn't even have dialogue and I'm in love with your Minseok, that's how awesome your characters are <3

+ Wow, you wrote me Sukai <3
+ You wrote me positive ending Sukai <33
+ Tbh I cringed in terror at the first wedding ring mention. I would have loved angsty infidelity too, but thank you for a perfect fluffy and empowering ending bc I have to go to work tomorrow and not be a lovesick zombie <333
+ Are you kidding how could I mind I'm so happy to enjoy this beautiful collage of combined prompts, thank you so much for writing this I enjoyed every word <3333
+ I laughed, I got really close to crying, and I think it's time for me to shut up now bc what is this massive comment thing. I promise I'm usually not like this, no really

P.S. If you like, I can further spam you with Jongin gifs after reveals
P.P.S. You are an awesome human being~