i got my closure
She finally called me. Drunk of course. The convo ended rather bad. I told her that regardless of evrything thats ever happened between us and all that that i want to try to make out friendship work, cuz she means alot to me. She basically said "Your going to be in simi, i live in santa cruz" and then we both said nothing.Then she said, "k im gonna go" and i said "yeah fine" and she hung up... I felt sorta hurt. I mean, its one thing to not want to date me for whatever reason, but now because i was bitter for a few months and didnt talk to her for a while, our friendship is meaningless? fuck that. fuck her. This is why i used to never care about people, it was easier that way. If u were the one who did the not caring, and people cared about you then you found out who was worth your time. Now that i care first, i find myself getting fucked over time and time again.
That phone call closed my Santa Cruz door.. the one i wasnt so sure about closing. Now im sure i wanted it closed and locked.
That wasnt my only closure tonight. I saw layne too. it was nice seeing layne again, and also with that knowing that i was over her. I was worried that seeing her was gonna spark something (which often happens with me when im with an ex) but it didnt this time. Im glad that we can still be friends, and taht i get along with the friends and her sister regardless of our past.
On my drive home i talked to Ana for like 2 hours. It was nice, she makes me feel loved. Im anxious to get back home and spend time with her and just forget this last years heart aches.
That phone call closed my Santa Cruz door.. the one i wasnt so sure about closing. Now im sure i wanted it closed and locked.
That wasnt my only closure tonight. I saw layne too. it was nice seeing layne again, and also with that knowing that i was over her. I was worried that seeing her was gonna spark something (which often happens with me when im with an ex) but it didnt this time. Im glad that we can still be friends, and taht i get along with the friends and her sister regardless of our past.
On my drive home i talked to Ana for like 2 hours. It was nice, she makes me feel loved. Im anxious to get back home and spend time with her and just forget this last years heart aches.