a life less ordinary
Having no voice leaves you with a lot of time on your hands. Time to step back and really consider life. The kind of time one seems to rarely find anymore. Or atleast for me. A kind of time I've missed. But we get so wrapped up in everything and everyone we lose sight of any actual purpose to exsistance... or if there even is one.
There are so many things that need to change. So many parts to me that need to be replaced. And yet each day seems more difficult than before. To forget the old me and move on.. forward. To forget. It's like kicking an addiction. Each day hurts worse than before. Each day is more tempting to fall back into an old lifestyle. And the support just never really seems to cut it.
How can love cut so deep? It is true that only the ones we let can hurt us. But with out letting yourself care for anyone... though saving yourself enormous amounts of pain... you walk through life alone and empty. There has to be a balance. Somewhere where we can love and let go... were the actions of those we care for doesn't affect us. But then again... I guess that's part of any real love. And it's just how we act on these emotions that set us apart. Sometimes it takes so much effort.... effort to hold back... to think and offer kindness instead of pain. And though these times go unnoticed.. the moment you lose control.. the entirity of all acheived so far will go into a tailspin. Life. Love. It's all a cruel game of the gods.. sent to test us. See how long we can make it before we break.
And the worst part is... that we keep going. Strong or atleast appearing that way... for those rare small moments when everything seems to momentarily smile upon us. One can only imagine how amazing life would be if those moments lasted a lifetime.
Would that be more than human?
There are so many things that need to change. So many parts to me that need to be replaced. And yet each day seems more difficult than before. To forget the old me and move on.. forward. To forget. It's like kicking an addiction. Each day hurts worse than before. Each day is more tempting to fall back into an old lifestyle. And the support just never really seems to cut it.
How can love cut so deep? It is true that only the ones we let can hurt us. But with out letting yourself care for anyone... though saving yourself enormous amounts of pain... you walk through life alone and empty. There has to be a balance. Somewhere where we can love and let go... were the actions of those we care for doesn't affect us. But then again... I guess that's part of any real love. And it's just how we act on these emotions that set us apart. Sometimes it takes so much effort.... effort to hold back... to think and offer kindness instead of pain. And though these times go unnoticed.. the moment you lose control.. the entirity of all acheived so far will go into a tailspin. Life. Love. It's all a cruel game of the gods.. sent to test us. See how long we can make it before we break.
And the worst part is... that we keep going. Strong or atleast appearing that way... for those rare small moments when everything seems to momentarily smile upon us. One can only imagine how amazing life would be if those moments lasted a lifetime.
Would that be more than human?