i don't believe in miracles . . .
i've been somewhat overwhelmed recently, but it's been my fault for allowing myself to be so overtaken by such things. nothing is lost, nothing is broken, nothing is missing. i guess that it shows how weak of a person i truly am, and how carried away i become when emotions are involved. it's difficult placing everything on the line, giving someone the opportunity to hurt you. sometimes i'm not so sure that love is worth it, all of this confusion, the sleepless nights, the anxiety, the depression, the drinking, the cigarettes. but deep down, the same conclusion always resurfaces; love is more than worth all of the bad. to quote a beautiful friend of mine, "love is all we have" and she couldn't have been more right, without love this world would be worth nothing, and we'd have nothing to look forward to. i'm not special, i can't expect everything to go perfectly for me. so i'm willing to take that chance, especially with this certain girl. if i get hurt, yeah, it'll suck, but i can pick up the pieces and be grateful knowing that i gave it all i had. new people will arise, along with new problems. hell, i'll have new problems as soon as the wind changes. i love her, and right now that's all that matters to me. even if it wasn't mutual, i wouldn't give up. i won't give up that easily.