today
So I had normal school today and it was ok but I feel like I'm missing something in my life. I hung out with people in school but I was mostly bored... Nothing seemed to interest me. I went to (mysteryx)'s house and he was busy doing art stuff.. ::sigh:: for some reason, since I started going out with him again I feel tied to him. I think we have a decent relationship but we havent really done anything like go out places and I think that is more my fault because I feel like there is nothing to do. What am I supposed to do? Is it just me? Well I really like him and again saw his amazing art.. I don't know right now I don't really find myself very attractive and I don't really know where my life is going. I feel like a stranger but not ostracized just ignored. I think I need friends who I can confde in maybe (mysteryx) but I think he judges me too much.
So I went to Brightwood with Emily Colvin and we were on the rope swing (which usually cheers me up but didn't) and there were these little kids just watching us for awhile so I was like whatever and we kept on talking. Then they asked if they could fish here. I flipped out and I ranted about why they shouldn't fish how it kills the animals and they asked if I was a vegetarian like that was some sort of sin. And then they tried to scare me away by saying they ate fish. I went on to explain how they have the whole lake to fish and this is the only spot that the rope was so they should move. (emily tried to be more polite) they told me that it was the best place to fish and I looked over to the spot where all the experienced fishermen were and there was one... so I suggested they go there but they gave me lip about how they eat fish. I told them that the lake was full of toxic chemicals (which it is) and they walked off. Later when I was takling to Emily they shouted, "Are you gay?" I said yes but I don't think they heard me.
That episode started me talking to Emily about being vegetarian (a conversation we started a week before) and she was saying all this stuff that had no point and just proved that humans eat meat out of greed. Anyway I could write about our conversation for well over an hour so to sum things up I made her promise to try and be vegetarian. Yes I am a pushy vegetarian blah.
Looking at myself in the silver part of my speakers I relaize I look like a ghost... Do I have a soul and is my environmentalist attitude unfounded? Who am I?
So I went to Brightwood with Emily Colvin and we were on the rope swing (which usually cheers me up but didn't) and there were these little kids just watching us for awhile so I was like whatever and we kept on talking. Then they asked if they could fish here. I flipped out and I ranted about why they shouldn't fish how it kills the animals and they asked if I was a vegetarian like that was some sort of sin. And then they tried to scare me away by saying they ate fish. I went on to explain how they have the whole lake to fish and this is the only spot that the rope was so they should move. (emily tried to be more polite) they told me that it was the best place to fish and I looked over to the spot where all the experienced fishermen were and there was one... so I suggested they go there but they gave me lip about how they eat fish. I told them that the lake was full of toxic chemicals (which it is) and they walked off. Later when I was takling to Emily they shouted, "Are you gay?" I said yes but I don't think they heard me.
That episode started me talking to Emily about being vegetarian (a conversation we started a week before) and she was saying all this stuff that had no point and just proved that humans eat meat out of greed. Anyway I could write about our conversation for well over an hour so to sum things up I made her promise to try and be vegetarian. Yes I am a pushy vegetarian blah.
Looking at myself in the silver part of my speakers I relaize I look like a ghost... Do I have a soul and is my environmentalist attitude unfounded? Who am I?