more good than bad, at least that's how it's starting to feel

[forceasmile]

comic books are actually like a drug for me now. you should understand that the whole time i was a kid i read comic books like crazy, i had tons of 'em, every month i'd follow spider-man and the x-men and all my favourites and then by the time i dropped out of high school and started getting fucked up and getting laid all the time i'd stopped reading. so, anybody who knows me knows that, well, while it's nothing to be proud of, i've used drugs more than the next guy my age, and so sometimes when somebody refers to something that's not a drug as being in any way like a drug, i think it a bit nonsensical, but now after all the crack and coke and dope and rolls and mushrooms and acid and whatever else and now that i'm done with most of that whenever i sit down and get really, really baked and read through a shitton of green lantern or spidey or batman i feel, honest to god, like i am on something. like i can feel it in my head and in my skin. everything feels a little bit colder than it really is, both my mind and body feel especially excited, anxious, stimulated. i feel like it's christmas fucking morning and i'm rolling bolls getting my dick rubbed through my pants after putting on warm clothes fresh out the dryer and lighting up a goddam newport i mean i feel amazing. time like stops or slows and i sit there high as fuck so caught in these pictures that i'll look at one frame forever or smile the whole time i read or even laugh out loud at lots of things (not just funny things but sometimes i'll finish an issue, sit and think about it, then laugh at how much i enjoyed it). now when i walk into heroes i feel like i'm in a parking lot copping whatever it is i'm about to dose myself with. i sit and read never wanting it to be over and i just feel so fucking fantastic and i feel on top of the fucking world and it's become an addiction but sort of a healthy one because it's got me back into drawing and hopefully soon that'll have me producing something of my own, even if only locally and independently. so if anyone ever wants to read any comics by me then it shouldn't be long before i start seriously putting something together.
sam hasn't seen cougar or been around for however long, in other news. she's got a couple warrants out for her arrest and she calls every few days just to hang up on me and all her friends make fun of me for being a single father and try and tell me the reason sam sees them and not me or her son is because she likes them better (because somewhere along the line the world became a place where people talk shit to you about how your baby's mom likes them better than she likes your son).

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