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[for_you_my_love]

Life sucks the big one. I honestly think God hates me.Three deaths in two weeks. A friend, a dear friends Mother, and an amazing Grandfather, all gone off to a place far better than this one.

I'm leaving for Ohio tomorrow.
I'm not so sure when I'll be back.. after Thanksgiving Break is what my Mom is planning on, but she's not too sure.

Comments

<3

[xoutofcashxious]

"i know it sounds hard to believe but once you stop fighting it and accept it as part of you, it's not such a bad thing. it will still hurt, it will still tear you apart, but in a different way. a more intimate way. you can use it. it's yours. it belongs to you. but the pain of grief..." he hesitated. "the pain you're feeling now doesn't last forever. it can't. it hurts too much. you can't live with that much pain -- not forever. your body can't take it. your mind can't take it. it knows that if you don't get over it, it's going to kill you. and it doesn't want that. so it makes you get over it. but getting over it doesn't mean forgetting it, it doesn't mean betraying your feelings, it just means reducing the pain to a tolerable level, a level that doesn't destroy you. i know that right now the idea of getting over it is unimaginable. it's impossible. inconceivable. unthinkable. you don't want to get over it. why should you? it's all you've got. you don't want kind words, you don't care what other people think or say, you don't want to know how they felt when they lost someone. they are not you, are they? they can't feel what you feel. the only thing you want is the thing you can't have. it's gone. never coming back. no one knows how that feels. no one knows what it's like to reach out and touch someone who isn't there and will never be there again. no one knows that unfillable emptiness. no one but you." he looked at me, a single tear in his eye. "you and me, love. we don't want anything. we want to die. but life won't let us. we're all its got."
- from the book Lucas.

Re: <3

[for_you_my_love]

::cries:: Oh boy, thank you love.
♥♥