No Ordinary Love, Part 3, chapter 200
200
In that moment Sweetie came home. Her cheerful voice instantly shifted the atmosphere cleared it of all hard thoughts.
“Oh, hi,” she smiled when she saw Nik. Still that didn’t prevent her from kissing me first. “You must be Nik, right? Ville’s friend from the class?”
Nik chuckled on her playing dumb but he got the message.
“Yeah, and you must be Ville’s wife, right?” he said shifting Ari to his left side and shook Sweetie’s hand with his right one.
“Observant fellow huh?” she teased him. “You mind?” she eyed Ari in Nik’s arms. He nodded and let her take it. “Were you a good girl?” she asked her.
“You won’t believe it but she was like hypnotized,” I began. “She didn’t cry for hours.”
“Oh, that’s the first,” she was truly impressed as she took her seat next to me, leaning on me a little. “If we ever need a babysitter for her would you be interested Nik?”
“Sure, she’s easy to handle.”
“Speak for yourself,” I chuckled then told him how I lost it by the end of first month when Ari was impossible and it made Nik laugh.
“So, you guys were working on something?” Sweetie changed the topic.
“Yeah,” Nik nodded.
“Actually, I was, he was taking care of Ari,” I corrected him. “He’s already finished with his.”
“Ah, someone’s on a roll,” she commented glancing at Nik.
“Umm, Ville’s on a good start, too,” he quickly shifted her attention to me.
“It’s not finished yet, but you can read if you want,” I said.
“No, no, I can be patient,” she shook her head.
“Ok. So how was your day?” I asked her.
“Not bad,” she mused. “Nothing too interesting. At least I’m glad there’s no new students to meet. Now I know exactly what I have to deal with.”
“You don’t sound much excited,” Nik noticed.
“No, I am, I am,” she assured him. “It’s just today there were more people who were rejected by my publishing house and they’re not quite happy about it. It’ll take them a lot to accept that they did something wrong. Or I’ll have to pay visit to my employees. Actually, I think I should do that anyway.”
“I guess that was something you should’ve counted on in advance,” Nik said.
“Oh, I did. Actually, I’ve expected more of those really angry kind of types,” she pointed out. “You know those that would first give me their idea wait for me to say it’s good then try to catch me redhanded and ask then why you haven’t published it.”
“And there weren’t any of those yet?” I just needed a confirmation she shook her head.
“You shouldn’t really care about them,” Nik added.
“It’s a little complicated for me not to worry about people, Nik,” she pointed out.
“Ok, but still, it shouldn’t affect you,” he repeated.
“Thanks for your concern. You’re really proving to be something other,” she complimented him. “But enough about me. What’s your story Nik?”
“Umm… it’s about a vampire vixen….”
“No, no,” she shook her head giggling. “I’m not asking about that.”
“Oh,” he nodded. “Ok, just a moment, this is a bit weird for me. You can really pretend you don’t know any of us during the class?”
“Yeah,” she nodded. “I don’t have to pretend. Just take a distance for everybody’s benefit.”
“Care to explain it? I mean, here we’re not limited by time, it’s much more personal, close-knitted atmosphere. Usually that’s more fruitful environment, right?”
“Yeah, if you wouldn’t be attending my course,” she pointed out. “If we have met apart from it, I wouldn’t need to pretend. But since we didn’t… discussing things about course with just the two of you or only Ville, you think that would be a bit unfair to everybody else? Wouldn’t that kind of put you in advantage over the rest?”
“I don’t really see how,” Nik shook his head.
“Ok, say would you like me to read your story right now?” she asked him and he nodded. “And if I would have some suggestions about it what would you do?”
“Well, try to fix it of course,” he said then he nodded. “Ok, and then it wouldn’t be the first draft but final product, yeah I get it.”
“Or second draft, it doesn’t matter. Point is, others would feel the difference, you can’t fool them. That would undermine my authority, affect someone’s confidence even and I want to avoid all that. Plus, it’s much easier for me to express my opinion about your stories there. Inspire some creative and constructive interchange of different opinions,” she explained.
“Yeah, but their don’t really matter,” he shook his head. “You’re the only professional there.”
“Nik, that people there, they’re your potential audience,” she pointed out. “By impressing only me you’re gaining only someone who will like your work as long as it maintains certain quality. By impressing them you’re reaching out. Figuring how good you exactly are as well as why they hate or like it. I don’t like my books for the same reason you do. I don’t even value them for the same things or in the same way someone else does. If you ask me, I wouldn’t give myself half of the awards I’ve received for some crappy things I wrote yet I got them. But that’s the beauty of any form of art. It free for interpreting. Remember Twilight?” she asked and he nodded. “Remember what I said about it?” again Nik nodded. “Well, that was me being kind. I like the idea to some extent but that just about 1% of what I like. My understanding of that book is completely different from what most people value it for. Yet, that book is successful, people find it interesting. She was even praise by some people I’d never imagine liking it.”
“Ok, I get that, but I’m not so interested in making commercial success,” he returned.
“Then my opinion must be irrelevant to you above everything,” she concluded and leaved him baffled beyond words. “Tell me, why do you think I write at all?”
“Because you’re good at it. Because you know how, you love it.”
“Yes, I love it. I feel need to write. And because I want to say something. When I’m writing, I don’t give a damn about what anyone will think. I don’t let anyone edit my books. I don’t allow others suggest anything. I just write and send it directly to print. All that my publisher could do is print it and put it on sale. I don’t even allow prereading for the critics.”
“I didn’t know that.”
“Well, it’s not the usual way it happens,” she confessed handing Ari to me. “It’s just that I want to do this or that novel my way and it’s not available for discussion. You think I didn’t have people who would tell me if I had changed this or that how it would make my novel better? Trust me, it happens all the time but do I care?” she shrugged. “No, not at all.”
“But then what’s the point of this course if you don’t care?”
“Hopefully, by the end of this course you’ll find that answer for yourself,” she smiled.
“So you won’t tell me?”
“No, not now for sure.”
“And later? I mean when the course is over?”
“When it’s over and if you still don’t have it, then I’m afraid I was wasting your time,” she said with a sad smile leaving both Nik and me to ponder over her words. “Ok, I’m going to leave you two alone,” she said getting up leaning to pick Ariella in her arms.
“You never really give easy answers do you?” Nik asked her stopping her on her way out.
“What’s fun in that?” she charmingly returned and left.
“How in the hell’s name you live with that?” he asked me seriously.
“You get used to,” I winked.
“Time makes it easier huh?”
“Nah, not really,” I giggled.