trying to weigh the good and bad...
SO I graduate this summer. Everyone is telling me I have a lot of time to think about what I'm going to do...I'm not sure my situation translates well to anyone whom I've gotten advice from. Though when getting advice I can't just outright refuse it. I take it, and I listen really for anything I can. I appreciate not only what is being done, but the fact that I am not prescient and really....who the fuck am I, they could be on to somthing. But really, I just can't agree with anything I'm getting so optimistically told.
Anyone else this close to graduation and just as clueless as to what they are doing next (David you don't count). I'm pretty sure all the people who told me I was going to college my whole life assumed I'd get to this point in much more the same fashion and condition as they did, with much of the same aspirations from here. Family, stability mainstream...contentment. Well wherever the fuck they are, I'm calling shenannigans. That's all bullshit. Everyone keeps telling me I'll figure it out, I've got all this potential. THe problem is I don't really want to do much of what I have the potential to do. And unlike my parents, I don't have a family already started before i graduate, pressuring me to settle and make "good decisions."
I joked about it. But really, I'm trying to reason myself out of impulsively taking off after i graduate. Just go somewhere far away and work a shit job. Go somewhere else after that til i get tired of being mercurial. Move west, and south...just keep going.
ALl I know is school at this point. I know exactly how long i need to study or prepare for any assignment. I know when to go to bed to wake up, and I know exactly how to word myself to achieve any desired response from any teacher you put me in front of. I Know the things I've learned in school very well. I've tried to focus my classes such that I'm using what I learn in onther classes though they may not be in the same field. I think it is safe to say I learned all that was put in front of me. Even the class I failed this past semester. SUre I bombed the paper, which was the only grade in the class. BUt I'll be damned if anyone in that class has a better grasp of what was said by the teacher and text authors. SO yea, fuck grades. If this was supposed to teach me what "the real world" is like. I hope the real world is more meritritious than school. Cause often I do very little and achieve very much...just as often as I do very very much, and achieve very very little (Like that F).
Ok NOW, OUT OF THE POOL! Adult swim, time to swim like an adult. Really? Fuck that. I've been kept in the joyous world of the Student/teacher brown-nosing dichotomy. Where attendence is sooo much more important than performance. What is more disturbing than finding it hard to consider myself anything more than a 21 year old boy...I can't say, as I look around, that I see anyone else my age, acting as we are "supposed to." I see a bunch of big and very spoiled children. And all of us are very impressed with ourselves. And none of us give a damn about what we are marching into.
Fuck falling in line after i graduate...
Anyone else this close to graduation and just as clueless as to what they are doing next (David you don't count). I'm pretty sure all the people who told me I was going to college my whole life assumed I'd get to this point in much more the same fashion and condition as they did, with much of the same aspirations from here. Family, stability mainstream...contentment. Well wherever the fuck they are, I'm calling shenannigans. That's all bullshit. Everyone keeps telling me I'll figure it out, I've got all this potential. THe problem is I don't really want to do much of what I have the potential to do. And unlike my parents, I don't have a family already started before i graduate, pressuring me to settle and make "good decisions."
I joked about it. But really, I'm trying to reason myself out of impulsively taking off after i graduate. Just go somewhere far away and work a shit job. Go somewhere else after that til i get tired of being mercurial. Move west, and south...just keep going.
ALl I know is school at this point. I know exactly how long i need to study or prepare for any assignment. I know when to go to bed to wake up, and I know exactly how to word myself to achieve any desired response from any teacher you put me in front of. I Know the things I've learned in school very well. I've tried to focus my classes such that I'm using what I learn in onther classes though they may not be in the same field. I think it is safe to say I learned all that was put in front of me. Even the class I failed this past semester. SUre I bombed the paper, which was the only grade in the class. BUt I'll be damned if anyone in that class has a better grasp of what was said by the teacher and text authors. SO yea, fuck grades. If this was supposed to teach me what "the real world" is like. I hope the real world is more meritritious than school. Cause often I do very little and achieve very much...just as often as I do very very much, and achieve very very little (Like that F).
Ok NOW, OUT OF THE POOL! Adult swim, time to swim like an adult. Really? Fuck that. I've been kept in the joyous world of the Student/teacher brown-nosing dichotomy. Where attendence is sooo much more important than performance. What is more disturbing than finding it hard to consider myself anything more than a 21 year old boy...I can't say, as I look around, that I see anyone else my age, acting as we are "supposed to." I see a bunch of big and very spoiled children. And all of us are very impressed with ourselves. And none of us give a damn about what we are marching into.
Fuck falling in line after i graduate...