Been a while...
Tom wanted me to start checking my livejournal again. I guess I might as well start updating it again....
I'm not in a great mood today. I'm really lonely. I don't know what to do. For the first time in a really, really long time I want a boyfriend. A real boyfriend who does all those boyfriend things. Maybe I'm just lonely. Maybe it's because I miss Ben so damn much. How is it the guy I've totally fallen for is in the Army? Even worse, how is he in Iraq? I've been protesting the war since it started. I remember walk outs in high school and rallies. I remember going to see speakers and signing petitions. Now the guy I'm crazy about is fighting over there. And no matter how much I hate that, I see that we can't just pull our troops out at this point.
Ben seems so perfect, but maybe I'm kidding myself. When he gets back from Iraq he'll still be living in Louisiana. I'll get to see him maybe once a month. And he may go back to Iraq again. What do I do? I don't want to like someone this much who I never see. And I haven't been able to really get close to anyone in Atlanta. I date some (we have an open relationship), but it all just reminds me of how much I miss him.
I just don't know what to do with myself. I don't have the energy to make any real decisions.
I'm not in a great mood today. I'm really lonely. I don't know what to do. For the first time in a really, really long time I want a boyfriend. A real boyfriend who does all those boyfriend things. Maybe I'm just lonely. Maybe it's because I miss Ben so damn much. How is it the guy I've totally fallen for is in the Army? Even worse, how is he in Iraq? I've been protesting the war since it started. I remember walk outs in high school and rallies. I remember going to see speakers and signing petitions. Now the guy I'm crazy about is fighting over there. And no matter how much I hate that, I see that we can't just pull our troops out at this point.
Ben seems so perfect, but maybe I'm kidding myself. When he gets back from Iraq he'll still be living in Louisiana. I'll get to see him maybe once a month. And he may go back to Iraq again. What do I do? I don't want to like someone this much who I never see. And I haven't been able to really get close to anyone in Atlanta. I date some (we have an open relationship), but it all just reminds me of how much I miss him.
I just don't know what to do with myself. I don't have the energy to make any real decisions.