Insert Catchy Title Here
"Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television, Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players, and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol and dental insurance. Choose fixed- interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisure wear and matching luggage. Choose a three piece suite on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pushing you last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked-up brats you have spawned to replace yourself. Choose your future. Choose life... But why would I want to do a thing like that?" - Trainspotting
I've come to the conclusion that empathy is a horrible horrible thing. I may seem to ramble on, but excuse me considering it's almost 5 am. After a long talk tonight, I have come to realize that the basic human instinct of "Out of sight, out of mind" developed as a child continues on throughout life.
Right now I don't know where I am. No, I am not high or drunk. I am fully conscious and I know I am my room. But mentally I have no idea. A new spot in my brain is hurting, possibly meaning it is being tweaked to control new things or maybe I've destroyed something. Only time will tell.
I am shivering, a chill runs the length of my spine, down and back again. I am not cold, I warmly dressed. The chills are my thoughts, my gut, my guilt. Pacing up and down my spine, reminding me that it is there and that I have to deal with it. The radio is asking me "Do you wanna die?" (dunno what song it is, but it really is) and right now I don't know the answer to the question. I need to escape. I need to find my release. I need this now more than ever. Things you cannot know, today has sucked. Not just because of that one thing (you know who you are, and no it's not because of you.)
The thoughts come back to mind, and I pull my clothes tighter, knowing that they will not stop the chills. My head hangs low, as it has been hanging in my hands most of the latter early morning. Things I have done, things that should not be done. I'm just thinking about everything but then again I'm thinking about nothing.
Take this however you want, take it inside of you, let it swell, let it build up, post a god damn comment! it doesn't take but a fucking minute. Show that you care, god damnit
I've come to the conclusion that empathy is a horrible horrible thing. I may seem to ramble on, but excuse me considering it's almost 5 am. After a long talk tonight, I have come to realize that the basic human instinct of "Out of sight, out of mind" developed as a child continues on throughout life.
Right now I don't know where I am. No, I am not high or drunk. I am fully conscious and I know I am my room. But mentally I have no idea. A new spot in my brain is hurting, possibly meaning it is being tweaked to control new things or maybe I've destroyed something. Only time will tell.
I am shivering, a chill runs the length of my spine, down and back again. I am not cold, I warmly dressed. The chills are my thoughts, my gut, my guilt. Pacing up and down my spine, reminding me that it is there and that I have to deal with it. The radio is asking me "Do you wanna die?" (dunno what song it is, but it really is) and right now I don't know the answer to the question. I need to escape. I need to find my release. I need this now more than ever. Things you cannot know, today has sucked. Not just because of that one thing (you know who you are, and no it's not because of you.)
The thoughts come back to mind, and I pull my clothes tighter, knowing that they will not stop the chills. My head hangs low, as it has been hanging in my hands most of the latter early morning. Things I have done, things that should not be done. I'm just thinking about everything but then again I'm thinking about nothing.
Take this however you want, take it inside of you, let it swell, let it build up, post a god damn comment! it doesn't take but a fucking minute. Show that you care, god damnit