This is the sort of post that encourages broad re-evaluations of one's life and career
To make a long story very short: the past 3 weeks have been crisis-mode at work. I've been at work for 10+ hours a day. About 25% of that is actually getting stuff fixed. The other 75% is the politicking problem-fixing dance of the large corporation. This entire thing is working on my very. last. nerve.
Which is to say: I never used to understand how people could just go to work and go home and watch tv and go to bed. But now? I get the impulse. I get home, and I'm not necessarily tired, but I just feel... empty. Like, I don't have the impulse to DO anything. I have a lot of things that I want to do/make/write: I just can't face looking at any of those. All I want to do is basically curl up and erase myself until I'm tired enough to go to sleep, and wait until weekend.
Guys? This isn't how I want to live my life. This sucks.
Consequentially:
- I have a holiday planned at the end of the month. I will be with my husband, next to a lake, with good food, books, plans, and no work email access.
- Work has until then to shape up. Otherwise, active job-hunting ensues.
- My plans for the future are getting a lot more varied. None of them involve corporate. I've got a firm 5-year limit on that, for keeping-a-grip-on-sanity-hope-and-joy reasons.
- In 5 years, we will be far away from city, large amounts of people, and large corporations. Specifically, we are being good enough at managing our finances (aka: not buying a lot of things that other people consider bare necessities) that we should be able to pull it off without being completely screwed. I have hopes!
Basically: if there's no end in sight, I'm gonna make an end and stick to it. I refuse to turn into the person who makes this my life. This is No Good.
Which is to say: I never used to understand how people could just go to work and go home and watch tv and go to bed. But now? I get the impulse. I get home, and I'm not necessarily tired, but I just feel... empty. Like, I don't have the impulse to DO anything. I have a lot of things that I want to do/make/write: I just can't face looking at any of those. All I want to do is basically curl up and erase myself until I'm tired enough to go to sleep, and wait until weekend.
Guys? This isn't how I want to live my life. This sucks.
Consequentially:
- I have a holiday planned at the end of the month. I will be with my husband, next to a lake, with good food, books, plans, and no work email access.
- Work has until then to shape up. Otherwise, active job-hunting ensues.
- My plans for the future are getting a lot more varied. None of them involve corporate. I've got a firm 5-year limit on that, for keeping-a-grip-on-sanity-hope-and-joy reasons.
- In 5 years, we will be far away from city, large amounts of people, and large corporations. Specifically, we are being good enough at managing our finances (aka: not buying a lot of things that other people consider bare necessities) that we should be able to pull it off without being completely screwed. I have hopes!
Basically: if there's no end in sight, I'm gonna make an end and stick to it. I refuse to turn into the person who makes this my life. This is No Good.