worried
Im seemed a little withdrawn today. Not that she didn't laugh and tumble around the bed with Ur, or get excited about making hamburger patties by herself. She even read us all a story this evening, inventing a simple narrative for a picture book. It was based on the text she'd heard us read, but seemed (linguistically) original - wow! But there was an exuberance that wasn't there. She was tired (Ur too), but I also think she was worried.
Last night Im saw an argument that ended in Di yelling at me. She shouldn't be exposed to it at all, but she is - too often. If Di and I have a discussion she'll often interject, trying to turn the conversation toward her if it seems tense. If it goes further and Di raises her voice Im will sometimes yell at her, matching her tone. Sometimes she runs to me if Di seems volatile. Di sat quietly with her for while before bed. I heard her ask Di why she was angry with Papa ('because he didn't do something he said he would...'). Im and I talked about it a little too. At least she can verbalize it a bit. I'm trying to encourage that.
I was sleeping in Im's bed and woke up at 5:45 because she starting crying. I could hear Ur crying loudly in our bedroom and Di stomping around the house, very frustrated, telling Ur loudly that she had to stop crying. Apparently Ur had been awake and crying (mostly) since 4am. I went to take care of Ur once Im calmed down, but there was too much going on and Im soon came in to see Ur and me while Di slept a bit in Im's bed. We just stayed up - the girls seemed fine once no one was suggesting they had to be in bed. They napped though - two for Ur and one for Im - as it should be, even though Im apparently fought it hard in her stroller after class.
I can see that Im is starting to carry a little load on her shoulders and it's heartbreaking - maybe the sadest thing I've ever experienced.
I'm also curious about Im's imaginary friends, Jimmy and Ligham... not worried that she has them, but a little concerned about how often they come up. They live just down the street in a building that we pass on the way to the park. She often calls them in the morning, excited to have them to come over. If we pass their building later she'll tell me quietly that they're sleeping and can't come to the park. Today we played with them a bit, pretending they were little people we could hold in our hands or put on the table. This afternoon she was visibly withdrawn and told me she was sad because Jimmy and Ligham didn't come over. I asked if she wanted some other friends to come over or if she wanted her cousins to come back or if she's like to see her grossmutti or grandma? None of them interested her. She seemed tired but more herself by bedtime.
Last night Im saw an argument that ended in Di yelling at me. She shouldn't be exposed to it at all, but she is - too often. If Di and I have a discussion she'll often interject, trying to turn the conversation toward her if it seems tense. If it goes further and Di raises her voice Im will sometimes yell at her, matching her tone. Sometimes she runs to me if Di seems volatile. Di sat quietly with her for while before bed. I heard her ask Di why she was angry with Papa ('because he didn't do something he said he would...'). Im and I talked about it a little too. At least she can verbalize it a bit. I'm trying to encourage that.
I was sleeping in Im's bed and woke up at 5:45 because she starting crying. I could hear Ur crying loudly in our bedroom and Di stomping around the house, very frustrated, telling Ur loudly that she had to stop crying. Apparently Ur had been awake and crying (mostly) since 4am. I went to take care of Ur once Im calmed down, but there was too much going on and Im soon came in to see Ur and me while Di slept a bit in Im's bed. We just stayed up - the girls seemed fine once no one was suggesting they had to be in bed. They napped though - two for Ur and one for Im - as it should be, even though Im apparently fought it hard in her stroller after class.
I can see that Im is starting to carry a little load on her shoulders and it's heartbreaking - maybe the sadest thing I've ever experienced.
I'm also curious about Im's imaginary friends, Jimmy and Ligham... not worried that she has them, but a little concerned about how often they come up. They live just down the street in a building that we pass on the way to the park. She often calls them in the morning, excited to have them to come over. If we pass their building later she'll tell me quietly that they're sleeping and can't come to the park. Today we played with them a bit, pretending they were little people we could hold in our hands or put on the table. This afternoon she was visibly withdrawn and told me she was sad because Jimmy and Ligham didn't come over. I asked if she wanted some other friends to come over or if she wanted her cousins to come back or if she's like to see her grossmutti or grandma? None of them interested her. She seemed tired but more herself by bedtime.