1st Smile; video//action to RV-mates

[monocled]

[The laptop recorder shows Hakkai's threateningly-happy smiling face. He's in the little dining nook of his RV.]--So it appears our little road trip is underway. When I attempted to leave, I found myself in a waiting room, and then on this RV. Gojyo, I assume you're on one of the other ones

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[gojyo_saaama]

[ Gojyo doesn't have clue one about how to use a laptop, much less about how to activate video conferencing. Fortunately, not knowing that good computer maintenance includes keeping the lid down, his is open and on when Hakkai starts transmitting. ]

...Hakkai!

[ And the display is nothing but Gojyo's forehead, as he leans way too close to the camera to whisper. ]

Hey, be careful wanderin' off, okay? I didn't think they'd ever let me out of there!

[monocled]

Ahaha. You're the one who entered the contest, so I don't see why they should let you out.

[U mad, Hakkai?]

[gojyo_saaama]

[ Oh fuck you. ]

How long're you gonna hold that over my head, huh?

[monocled]

As long as it takes for us to get out of here.

[He's lying. He'll hold it over your head even after that.]

[gojyo_saaama]

...Well, we can't just walk out of here. At least I couldn't. There's a barrier or somethin', kept making me loop. The only place I could find was a warehouse-looking setup.

[monocled]

So I noticed.

I haven't been able to find a way off these RVs either, so I suppose we'll just have to be on guard for wherever this road trip takes us. Assuming we don't die from heart problems due to the high salt content of Spam.

[gojyo_saaama]

[ Hey, Sanzo and Goku aren't there, which means this isn't a big deal. Just a nuisance, that's all! They'll be out of here soon. ]

There's Spam? All right! That's the first good news I've heard all day!

[monocled]

[You might as well have been excited for roadkill, the way he is looking at you.]

--How is that good news?

[gojyo_saaama]

Spam's great. Spicy meat in a can, how is that not great?

[ Yes, he is smoking in the RV. Yes he is. ]

[monocled]

[When you say things like that, Gojyo, you really do look completely at home in front of some shoddy wood paneling smoking cheap cigarettes.]

--You really shouldn't smoke in such an enclosed space. It's inconsiderate to the other passengers.

[Of course he's going to nag, a little thing like not being in the same place would never stop him.]

[gojyo_saaama]

[ Pish. Next you'll be saying that there's something wrong with eating food that's fallen on the floor. ]

If you say it like that, I'm gonna smoke twice as much. They don't like it they can send me home.

[monocled]

Perhaps they'll send you home with manslaughter charge when you kill them all with second-hand smoke.

[brightly] In that case, it might work! Carry on.

[gojyo_saaama]

[ Actually, that's not a bad thought. ]

Everybody's real touchy-feely so far. Bet they wouldn't like it too much if I picked a fight.

[ What? One of them has to figure out what "punishments" are doled out here, and since it's Gojyo's fault they're here in the first place, it's his job to test the waters. ]

[monocled]

Just remember, I don't know what I'll be able to patch you up.

[gojyo_saaama]

You're not gonna heal me? I feel so unloved!

[monocled]

[brightly] That's a natural consequence to your actions! If you do things that cause you to suffer, you should continue to suffer! I think that's a very fair rule, especially considering I'm not in the vehicle with you, so if anything gets chopped off or broken you're on your own.