(no subject)
im so so close to leaving and coming home for good.
i just needa suffer a little more, to be sure.
im not feeling too good. im out of the base this weekend, and i'm gonna be alone. larry isn't getting out, as usual. and some of my friends that are here are going to jerusalem to chill. im in tel aviv right now, and i hate going to a city that i don't have a home. people that i don't know are gonna be at my friends house, the one i always sleep at. and i dont feel like being with them. i wish that everyone came to tel aviv and that i can sleep in my bed till its time to go out. do u guys get what i mean?
so ya, im sad that i dont have real fun friends to be with here.
i'm sad that i'm gonna go back to base after another shitty weekend. see, even my time out of the army, which is supposed to be fun, is always depressing and horrible.
i hate how im not enjoying what im doing with my life right now, especially since i sacrificed alot and made such a big change to go throught this. and i know its only me that feels this way. its not cuz im in the army that im depressed. everyone else is doing just fine, and are enjoying themselves.
so jordie, i understand how u feel (i just read ur lj entry about wanting something else in ur life). well just decide carefully. i think my life isnt as fun right now as i thot it would be. and if i come home, will it be like it was before, same old stuff?
i want something else. and i think its the unhealthiest thing ever to always want such extreme changes, with no specific direction.
i just have a lot of thinking to do about what i want with my life...
yesterday was the date me and larry started going out a year ago. ya our celebration was super fun. we talked on the phone for half an hour... thats pretty much it...
and i just talked to my mom, and she said she can't give me money for the ticket to cuba. *tear*
so if i can't come to the trip, ill be home in june most likely.
at least i'll be able to see everyone again... i can't wait!
i just needa suffer a little more, to be sure.
im not feeling too good. im out of the base this weekend, and i'm gonna be alone. larry isn't getting out, as usual. and some of my friends that are here are going to jerusalem to chill. im in tel aviv right now, and i hate going to a city that i don't have a home. people that i don't know are gonna be at my friends house, the one i always sleep at. and i dont feel like being with them. i wish that everyone came to tel aviv and that i can sleep in my bed till its time to go out. do u guys get what i mean?
so ya, im sad that i dont have real fun friends to be with here.
i'm sad that i'm gonna go back to base after another shitty weekend. see, even my time out of the army, which is supposed to be fun, is always depressing and horrible.
i hate how im not enjoying what im doing with my life right now, especially since i sacrificed alot and made such a big change to go throught this. and i know its only me that feels this way. its not cuz im in the army that im depressed. everyone else is doing just fine, and are enjoying themselves.
so jordie, i understand how u feel (i just read ur lj entry about wanting something else in ur life). well just decide carefully. i think my life isnt as fun right now as i thot it would be. and if i come home, will it be like it was before, same old stuff?
i want something else. and i think its the unhealthiest thing ever to always want such extreme changes, with no specific direction.
i just have a lot of thinking to do about what i want with my life...
yesterday was the date me and larry started going out a year ago. ya our celebration was super fun. we talked on the phone for half an hour... thats pretty much it...
and i just talked to my mom, and she said she can't give me money for the ticket to cuba. *tear*
so if i can't come to the trip, ill be home in june most likely.
at least i'll be able to see everyone again... i can't wait!