(no subject)
so i decided im not going to therapy anymore. its not helping me at all. i dont feel better after i leave. i cant open up to her...or to anyone on that matter. i have never cried in front of either therapists, which is pathedic. i have so much to cry about...so much emotion i just want to let go. i can tell people in here more things about my life than the person i am paying to listen to me. i am ill with myself.
krista is really low lately and im tryin my hardest to make her feel better cuz i know how she feels and it fucking sucks.
ive been thinkin a lot about my life lately. doin this body project shit really makes me think about wut IS important to me. i dont even fuckin know if i believe in my religion anymore. its so hard thinking about wut my goals are for life...wuts important, not important to me. i know it will turn out great though. im really...i dont know, anxious to tell the class about my sister. i dont think anyone else in the class can have the same stories as me.
it kinda sucks.
but it makes me who i am.
so ive told u all about me and krista's obsession with the song "ive had the time of my life" from the dirty dancing soundtrack and almost every time we r in my car together, we play it. well yesterday when we were in work...it came on and i started dancing. it was funny. then this man comes in with his son...who by the way (is the down syndrome kid who i always see in work and the first time i saw him was like 2 months after rita died and i cried when i saw him) so i saw him walk in with his dad and the song was still on. so the boy saw me dancing and started dancing too. it was so fucking adorable. it reminded me so much of rita. i was trying my hardest not to get upset. but it did. it really fucking did. i just didnt tell anybody.
i've been thinking about her a lot lately. i think bout graduation and HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO FILL UP 6 SEATS?! it pisses me off.
me and my father still arent talking. we even sat at the same table today for breakfast...just me and him, and didnt say a word to eachother. i am much better off.
lisa is seeing her ex husband. u kno, the guy me and my parents DONT TALK TO. long story, most of u dont know it. she wants to bring him around the house and my father wants nothing to do with him. i actually would agree with my father on this one, considering eric did try to push my father down the stairs.
should be a nice family reunion.
ill dedicate u a lil sumthin boys...
T: u've been a big help lately and i dont think u know how much i appreciate it. ur goin out of ur way to try to fix things and i love u for it lol...HAPPY NOW?!
-LEONE
Michael T. Liuzzi-my taco bell buddy!! u jus dont want to admit it that im a better texas hold'em player than u. we have a lotta laughs...cuz ur an asshole who writes about fuckin wendy's in ur journal. ur a kewl kid to chill wit n a good friend to talk 2. i hate you.
-DIE
krista is really low lately and im tryin my hardest to make her feel better cuz i know how she feels and it fucking sucks.
ive been thinkin a lot about my life lately. doin this body project shit really makes me think about wut IS important to me. i dont even fuckin know if i believe in my religion anymore. its so hard thinking about wut my goals are for life...wuts important, not important to me. i know it will turn out great though. im really...i dont know, anxious to tell the class about my sister. i dont think anyone else in the class can have the same stories as me.
it kinda sucks.
but it makes me who i am.
so ive told u all about me and krista's obsession with the song "ive had the time of my life" from the dirty dancing soundtrack and almost every time we r in my car together, we play it. well yesterday when we were in work...it came on and i started dancing. it was funny. then this man comes in with his son...who by the way (is the down syndrome kid who i always see in work and the first time i saw him was like 2 months after rita died and i cried when i saw him) so i saw him walk in with his dad and the song was still on. so the boy saw me dancing and started dancing too. it was so fucking adorable. it reminded me so much of rita. i was trying my hardest not to get upset. but it did. it really fucking did. i just didnt tell anybody.
i've been thinking about her a lot lately. i think bout graduation and HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO FILL UP 6 SEATS?! it pisses me off.
me and my father still arent talking. we even sat at the same table today for breakfast...just me and him, and didnt say a word to eachother. i am much better off.
lisa is seeing her ex husband. u kno, the guy me and my parents DONT TALK TO. long story, most of u dont know it. she wants to bring him around the house and my father wants nothing to do with him. i actually would agree with my father on this one, considering eric did try to push my father down the stairs.
should be a nice family reunion.
ill dedicate u a lil sumthin boys...
T: u've been a big help lately and i dont think u know how much i appreciate it. ur goin out of ur way to try to fix things and i love u for it lol...HAPPY NOW?!
-LEONE
Michael T. Liuzzi-my taco bell buddy!! u jus dont want to admit it that im a better texas hold'em player than u. we have a lotta laughs...cuz ur an asshole who writes about fuckin wendy's in ur journal. ur a kewl kid to chill wit n a good friend to talk 2. i hate you.
-DIE