(no subject)
i decided to turn on sum old school music for a lil while. i went up to rita's room and found the original dirty dancing cd lol. im listening it to now...its fucking great. it reminds me sooooo much of rita though. its great but then again it makes me upset cuz that was like her fuckin favorite movie. i miss her :-/
me and meliss finally fixed things. which is a good thing.
im bored as hell.
i really cant wait for school to start. im excited. its our fucking senior year. holy shit. i was waiting for my god damn schedule to come today but it never did. fucking mailman.
my mom has this professional picture of me when i was like 2 and rita when she was like 15 and im kissing her on the cheek. its so fucking cute. i want to get it blown up.
ive been thinking a lot about her lately. i can remember exactly what i was wearing the day she died. all of phils stuff...his hoodie and his sweat pants. every time i put them on...still...i think about that day. its so fucking hard to forget sumthing like that. i text him today. im an idiot. i knew he wouldnt text me back. i probably seem like a stalker...but i really cant stop fighting for sumthing that i believe in. that kid...as weird as it sounds, means so much to me. like i just SIT HERE wondering if anything reminds him of me. i cant exlain enough that i dont want this kid back, and i would never try to ruin n e thing with him and his girlfriend. i jus miss him so much.
im fucked up.
i wish i was fucked up right now actually...
it would take a lot of pain away.
ugh...i dont even know why i update anymore. it just gets me upset.
fuck this.
me and meliss finally fixed things. which is a good thing.
im bored as hell.
i really cant wait for school to start. im excited. its our fucking senior year. holy shit. i was waiting for my god damn schedule to come today but it never did. fucking mailman.
my mom has this professional picture of me when i was like 2 and rita when she was like 15 and im kissing her on the cheek. its so fucking cute. i want to get it blown up.
ive been thinking a lot about her lately. i can remember exactly what i was wearing the day she died. all of phils stuff...his hoodie and his sweat pants. every time i put them on...still...i think about that day. its so fucking hard to forget sumthing like that. i text him today. im an idiot. i knew he wouldnt text me back. i probably seem like a stalker...but i really cant stop fighting for sumthing that i believe in. that kid...as weird as it sounds, means so much to me. like i just SIT HERE wondering if anything reminds him of me. i cant exlain enough that i dont want this kid back, and i would never try to ruin n e thing with him and his girlfriend. i jus miss him so much.
im fucked up.
i wish i was fucked up right now actually...
it would take a lot of pain away.
ugh...i dont even know why i update anymore. it just gets me upset.
fuck this.