(no subject)
ATTENTION: THIS IS AN EXTREME RANT ENTRY...IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ IT, FINE
why does no one understand? why do people think that i have absolutely NO problems on my mind and can handle everything crashing down on me? why do people think that i can always listen? why do people think that i can't cry and that i don't hurt more than anything? well i have news for you...
i don't mind listening to people talk about their problems (despite how this entry may sound) but i am only ONE FUCKING PERSON THAT CAN ONLY TAKE SO MUCH! i listen to my friends talk about their problems all the time about different things, but when is it my turn? the only one MAJOR problem that i have right this second and for the past 5 fucking months is the fact that my cousin is dead and i'm never EVER going to see him again. does anyone have any idea how much i miss him? does anyone know that every night i go to bed praying to god to give my one more day with him? does anyone know how much pain i am in right now? does anyone really realize how much i want him back? no, no one does.
i know that if anyone comments on this entry they're just going to say "oh you can talk to me about it anytime" but that is very untrue. whenever i try to talk about him, they suddenly lose interest and turn away. i completely understand that death isn't an easy thing to deal with or even to listen to, but it effects me a lot and he was the hardest person to lose. i'm sorry if this seems really harsh/mean/cold-hearted or whatever negative adjective that you can fit in there but it's the god's honest truth.
fuck this rant.i'm done.
why does no one understand? why do people think that i have absolutely NO problems on my mind and can handle everything crashing down on me? why do people think that i can always listen? why do people think that i can't cry and that i don't hurt more than anything? well i have news for you...
i don't mind listening to people talk about their problems (despite how this entry may sound) but i am only ONE FUCKING PERSON THAT CAN ONLY TAKE SO MUCH! i listen to my friends talk about their problems all the time about different things, but when is it my turn? the only one MAJOR problem that i have right this second and for the past 5 fucking months is the fact that my cousin is dead and i'm never EVER going to see him again. does anyone have any idea how much i miss him? does anyone know that every night i go to bed praying to god to give my one more day with him? does anyone know how much pain i am in right now? does anyone really realize how much i want him back? no, no one does.
i know that if anyone comments on this entry they're just going to say "oh you can talk to me about it anytime" but that is very untrue. whenever i try to talk about him, they suddenly lose interest and turn away. i completely understand that death isn't an easy thing to deal with or even to listen to, but it effects me a lot and he was the hardest person to lose. i'm sorry if this seems really harsh/mean/cold-hearted or whatever negative adjective that you can fit in there but it's the god's honest truth.
fuck this rant.i'm done.