The Garden and the Arsonist
How do you know if you're deceived?
The biggest problem of deception is- if you're deceived you don't know it.
That is the nature of the problem. You think you are right.
The same goes with denial, you've convinced yourself don't have a problem.
Or you've developed clever strategies- conscious or unconscious to escape focusing on the problem, or avoiding any emotion surfacing. Whether that's the internet, false comforts, relationships, strivings anything to keep you busy or distracted from looking at what is going at the core because it's all a bit confronting.
So at what point do we know we are deceived, or do we really know what is going on below the surface?
How do we test it?
1 Timothy 4:1 'The Spirit clearly says that in later times some will abandon the faith and following deceiving spirits…. They forbid people to marry and order them to abstain from certain foods, which God created to be received with thanksgiving by those who believe and who know the truth. For everything God created is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, because it is consecrated by the word of God and prayer.'
It's possible.
The enemy is not creative. He's been trying to deceive us all since day one in Eden. He wants to trick us into thinking it is ok to do what we are doing, particuarly if it will bring about the destruction that he wants.
So how do we try and stay in the light and avoid deception?
Well its says we need to know the truth, and that is consecrated by the Word of God and through prayer. Two beautiful things. Nothing beats sitting in the presence of God and letting his truth set us free. It also mentions thanksgiving, being thankful for the good in our lives and to notice his provisions makes a big difference.
(I'm so thankful I spent the weekend with Cath. I'm so thankful for the Sun today. I'm thankful I have my own room, that I'll have my first go at teaching tommorow on the topic that has changed my life. Acceptance and Belonging. I'm so thankful that Becky will be visiting today).
Friends I think are crucial in helping us beat deception too. Friends can see an awful lot. Community is so important as it keeps you in check. Friends that you know walk closely with God. Friends that know you. If you isolate yourself and hang out with only those that agree with you, then you can still function in your denial/deception (been there done that).
I've been through times where I think I've been deceived. The mind is powerful, you can rationalise any behaviour if you feel it's easier or it is what you want or need at the time. But what if you are playing with fire? What if you are walking further and further from truth? What if you suddenly feel your spirit die, and the fruits of anxiety, pain, grief and loss?
1 John 1:5 'God is light; in Him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him but walk in the darkness we lie and do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son purifies us from all sin. If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
It is very confronting being willing enough to realise that I may be wrong. I remember someone defining humility as 'to be open to the possibility that you could be completely wrong'. So what if I was? What if I was letting sin fester beneath the surface of my conciousness? What if I believed too easily 'words from God' not realising that there can be a mix of influences out there...
1 John 4:1 'Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone into the world'.
There is a spiritual war going on brothers and sisters and we need to fight.
So I guess what I glean from that is that it is possible I've been totally deceived at points in my life. It is possible that all of us at some point have also been.
One thing I do know is that I still have the present and the more I ask for his help, he can put me back on track if I've wandered off. All I can now is devote myself to learning more of God and who is is from the Word, devoting myself to prayer both alone and in groups, be around
those that are close with God and open to their challenges.
My heart has also known no greater pain when I had to watch the love of my life be devoured before my very eyes. We had something very very special. And somewhere along the line I watched my loved one contract some sort of cancer of the soul and walk on a very different road.
I still find myself praying that he would turn around and walk the road that I know brought him so much life, as I believe I saw and witnessed the best version of himself, yet I've seen the enemy get threatened at that and take it away. It didn't only steal things from him, it stole the whole future as I knew it, as I hoped it to be for me too. It is very painful sitting in that loss as I have done in the past 6 months, no escaping, no denying, just facing the grief and the deeper layers of grief that started many years earlier.
He's now very far down that road and has met companions on that journey which is probably making it enjoyable for him, so I don't know if he'll ever have the courage or strength to turn back- but regardless, even if it is with his companions I pray they can turn back towards trusting God again and gain all the healing, hope, joy, peace and satisfaction that they can have.
You seem to be most alive when you're close with God and I pray that you can get closer to that place again. Not for me- it might be too late for me now by the sounds of things... But for you. All I know His best and perfect will comes when we walk with him. "IT"S NOT IF YOU"VE SINNED OR HAVE NOT SINNED BUT IF YOU WALK WITH HIM WHO WILL KEEP YOU FROM SIN". Oh I love his gracious attitude towards my old loved one.
This may be the way it was meant to be for now, maybe you are learning the most from this road, maybe this is the road you need to be on...
I know this is the road I am meant to be on too, and I am in safe hands (even if it is the hard and lonely road, it is also a beautiful road of resting in Him, relying on him who is bringing about great freedom, healing and the deepest joy I've ever known.. very ironic).
1 Peter 5:6-10 'Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your fellow believers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while WILL HIMSELF RESTORE YOU AND MAKE YOU STRONG, FIRM AND STEADFAST. TO him be the power for ever and ever. Amen.'
Thankyou God for working good out of this really hard situation.
Isaiah 42:3 'A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out'.
Jesus came to 'proclaim good news to the poor, to BIND UP THE BROKEN HEARTED, to proclaim freedom for the captives, and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim freedom the year of the Lords favour, and the day of vengeance for our God. To comfort those who mourn, the provide for those who grieve, to bestow on them a crown of BEAUTY INSTEAD OF ASHES, oil of JOY instead of mourning, a garment of praise instead a spirit of despair. They will be called might oaks, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor' (Is 61).
Thankyou God for your care and concern for the broken, for the pain and the provision of comfort, restoration of joy, beauty and praise.
It is you I will keep walking with. I hope you are too :)