(no subject)
It's probably 70 degrees outside and I'm willing to bet it's about 55 in here. So on a warm spring day I settle down in a psu sweatshirt and blanket to describe the latest hellish events in my life.
Who's psyched?!
I felt better before the AP Test than after it. Before I was buzzed on adrenaline, nerves and red bull. For some reason being nervous is almost a state of comfort for me. It's familiar, kind of like before OM competition or play. It makes me feel like my life is exciting. Like everyone else I spent the first four periods hiding out in the middle school, studying. The day before Brett and I were studying in the back of the Media Center and V came in. We asked him to name some existentialists...Adam Smith or not? He said American existentialists were all he could think of. We spoke briefly about how he took AP Euro twice so he could do really well on the test. I thought to myself, that might not be a bad idea. I could pretty much count on at least a four if I did...
By 2 o'clock the next day I was in the library, wishing I was underground in a coffin somewhere, and could not imagine ever wanting to take this test again. It was hell. I was in hell. The multiple choice, which on all the practice tests I've done I have always gotten at least 65 percent right, and that was before cramming, was excrutiating. I was nervous about time. The whole time I think I was sweating because I was positive I was going to run out of time. I had to stop the mc at 74/80. I think I must have skipped at least 7 in there somewhere. As everyone else has already mentioned, the questions failed to have anything to do with the majority of European History. I've said this many times...and I'll say it again. I know a lot about European History. A fucking lot. I could give a two hour lecture on it pretty easily.
From then on I was just so depressed and nervous and insecure about everything that my essays sucked ass. I stuck my two biases in the last sentence of my dbq and I only used 6, maybe had three groupings...but my thesis was pretty good. my other essays were just plain bad. I knew a lot and tried to stick it all in but lost any ability to write along the way. Vocabulary, structure...all went out the window.
Needless to say I didn't feel like being around anyone afterwards. Brett tried to talk to me but I just waved my had in front of my face and walked away...as usual.
I feel like shit. My stomach has blown up to the size of a small planet. I'm giving birth to planet y. Is there already a planet y?
Anyway I just want to lay down and never get back up again. i find no happiness in being full. i rarely find happiness anyway.
Who's psyched?!
I felt better before the AP Test than after it. Before I was buzzed on adrenaline, nerves and red bull. For some reason being nervous is almost a state of comfort for me. It's familiar, kind of like before OM competition or play. It makes me feel like my life is exciting. Like everyone else I spent the first four periods hiding out in the middle school, studying. The day before Brett and I were studying in the back of the Media Center and V came in. We asked him to name some existentialists...Adam Smith or not? He said American existentialists were all he could think of. We spoke briefly about how he took AP Euro twice so he could do really well on the test. I thought to myself, that might not be a bad idea. I could pretty much count on at least a four if I did...
By 2 o'clock the next day I was in the library, wishing I was underground in a coffin somewhere, and could not imagine ever wanting to take this test again. It was hell. I was in hell. The multiple choice, which on all the practice tests I've done I have always gotten at least 65 percent right, and that was before cramming, was excrutiating. I was nervous about time. The whole time I think I was sweating because I was positive I was going to run out of time. I had to stop the mc at 74/80. I think I must have skipped at least 7 in there somewhere. As everyone else has already mentioned, the questions failed to have anything to do with the majority of European History. I've said this many times...and I'll say it again. I know a lot about European History. A fucking lot. I could give a two hour lecture on it pretty easily.
From then on I was just so depressed and nervous and insecure about everything that my essays sucked ass. I stuck my two biases in the last sentence of my dbq and I only used 6, maybe had three groupings...but my thesis was pretty good. my other essays were just plain bad. I knew a lot and tried to stick it all in but lost any ability to write along the way. Vocabulary, structure...all went out the window.
Needless to say I didn't feel like being around anyone afterwards. Brett tried to talk to me but I just waved my had in front of my face and walked away...as usual.
I feel like shit. My stomach has blown up to the size of a small planet. I'm giving birth to planet y. Is there already a planet y?
Anyway I just want to lay down and never get back up again. i find no happiness in being full. i rarely find happiness anyway.