Broken
Name/TEAM: SGU
Fic or Bookmark? Fic
Prompt combo used: Rodney/Broken
Broken
Rodney stood on the pier and looked out to sea. Despite the fact that he seemed to be the same old Rodney McKay, brilliant and full of snark, he knew that something inside him had finally broken.
It happened the day that Carson died, but that wasn’t the start of it. It began back when they met that damned Wraith. Ok so Brendan Gall wasn’t someone who he would have called a friend. But that wasn’t the point. It was so hard to see him lying there on the ground. When Rodney had seen him around Atlantis, he had looked so young. Seeing him looking so old had been a real shock to him. He really hadn’t wanted to leave him, let alone give him a gun. When he had heard the gun shot, it took a chip out of something deep in his soul.
Then there was the time when someone released the nano-virus. He remembered loosing Dumais. That was hard because he liked her and for some reason, that he had never been able to fathom, she seemed to get on with him. He had been able to laugh with her. One minute she was there and the next minute she was gone. On top of that there was the moment when he thought that he was going die. That had been a really scary moment and all because of something that had been left behind. He had survived but others had not. And that had been yet another chip taken out of him.
Another moment that stuck in his mind was the events that took place at the Lagrange satellite. That was supposed to have been a turning point in their fight against the Wraith. At first, when they found it, it had been exciting. It had been something amazing. But everything had gone wrong after the first shot. The satellite had broken down and when they thought that they had got it fixed it ended up with Peter Grodin stuck on the satellite. All because of a stupid door.
Rodney had always remembered that moment with a feeling of guilt and sadness. Peter had been one of the scientists that had been with them at the Antarctic base and had become a familiar face in the gateroom in his position as gate-tech.
But the thing that had hurt him the most had been Peter’s last words. “I’m sorry.”
Every time Rodney remembered this event, he heard those words in his head. He had never understood what Peter had be trying to say with those words. What did he have to be sorry for? The fact that he couldn’t make it work? Rodney had never blamed him for what had happened and had often wondered if that was what was going through his mind at the time. All that Rodney knew was in the moment that the satellite exploded he felt yet another piece of him break away deep inside.
But the thing that finally broke him was the day that Carson died. Rodney remembered how Carson came to him and asked him to go fishing. Of course he had said that he was going for lunch with Katie Brown. Even if he hadn’t been going to have lunch with Katie, he wasn’t sure that he would’ve gone. At that time, the thought of spending a day fishing, (even if it was with his best friend), would’ve been his idea of hell.
And that was when it happened. There was an explosion. It was Hewston. They found out that she had been the cause. It had something to do with an ancient device that Dr’s Watson and Hewston had found. They had activated it and it had emitted radiation. And, although they didn’t know it at the time, this had caused tumors in the two doctors. And, with her death, they found out that the tumors were explosive.
After the death of Dr Hewston, they called in Dr Watson. Carson decided, despite protests from both Rodney and John, to operate on him. The operation was a great success and everything went well. However, as Carson went to deliver the tumour to its final resting place it exploded and Carson was killed.
That was the final straw for Rodney. He felt something deep in his soul shatter. In that one moment he had lost his best friend. He had lost the person that he saw as his confidant, the person who he could confide in. In that one moment his world was changed. And he knew that he would never be the same.
When he thought back to that moment, he was filled with guilt and what ifs. If he had gone with Carson would he still have been alive? Of course, someone else would’ve died, but it wouldn’t have been him.
The worst part of it all was having to pack all Carson’s things away. All that was left of his friend was personal effects. His smile, his kindness, his love, his bedside manner all gone because of the fact that the Ancients didn’t bother to clean up after themselves. As Rodney packed it all away, he felt a little bit of himself go in to each box and the emptiness that he felt deep inside grew. When they took Carson’s coffin through the gate , Rodney knew that there was a bit of him that went with him and it hurt.
After Carson had gone Rodney found himself being his usual self with his friends and colleagues. But when he was alone, he felt the emptiness deep inside.
“Carson I miss you. Dr Keller is good at her job, but she’s just not you. I’m sorry that I didn’t come fishing with you. Maybe if I had of done, you would still be here. I hope that you can forgive me.”
Rodney stood on the pier and looked out to sea and whispered, “I’m sorry.”
A/n This is not beta'd so all mistakes are mine. And I have no rights to Rodney even though I would love to.
Fic or Bookmark? Fic
Prompt combo used: Rodney/Broken
Broken
Rodney stood on the pier and looked out to sea. Despite the fact that he seemed to be the same old Rodney McKay, brilliant and full of snark, he knew that something inside him had finally broken.
It happened the day that Carson died, but that wasn’t the start of it. It began back when they met that damned Wraith. Ok so Brendan Gall wasn’t someone who he would have called a friend. But that wasn’t the point. It was so hard to see him lying there on the ground. When Rodney had seen him around Atlantis, he had looked so young. Seeing him looking so old had been a real shock to him. He really hadn’t wanted to leave him, let alone give him a gun. When he had heard the gun shot, it took a chip out of something deep in his soul.
Then there was the time when someone released the nano-virus. He remembered loosing Dumais. That was hard because he liked her and for some reason, that he had never been able to fathom, she seemed to get on with him. He had been able to laugh with her. One minute she was there and the next minute she was gone. On top of that there was the moment when he thought that he was going die. That had been a really scary moment and all because of something that had been left behind. He had survived but others had not. And that had been yet another chip taken out of him.
Another moment that stuck in his mind was the events that took place at the Lagrange satellite. That was supposed to have been a turning point in their fight against the Wraith. At first, when they found it, it had been exciting. It had been something amazing. But everything had gone wrong after the first shot. The satellite had broken down and when they thought that they had got it fixed it ended up with Peter Grodin stuck on the satellite. All because of a stupid door.
Rodney had always remembered that moment with a feeling of guilt and sadness. Peter had been one of the scientists that had been with them at the Antarctic base and had become a familiar face in the gateroom in his position as gate-tech.
But the thing that had hurt him the most had been Peter’s last words. “I’m sorry.”
Every time Rodney remembered this event, he heard those words in his head. He had never understood what Peter had be trying to say with those words. What did he have to be sorry for? The fact that he couldn’t make it work? Rodney had never blamed him for what had happened and had often wondered if that was what was going through his mind at the time. All that Rodney knew was in the moment that the satellite exploded he felt yet another piece of him break away deep inside.
But the thing that finally broke him was the day that Carson died. Rodney remembered how Carson came to him and asked him to go fishing. Of course he had said that he was going for lunch with Katie Brown. Even if he hadn’t been going to have lunch with Katie, he wasn’t sure that he would’ve gone. At that time, the thought of spending a day fishing, (even if it was with his best friend), would’ve been his idea of hell.
And that was when it happened. There was an explosion. It was Hewston. They found out that she had been the cause. It had something to do with an ancient device that Dr’s Watson and Hewston had found. They had activated it and it had emitted radiation. And, although they didn’t know it at the time, this had caused tumors in the two doctors. And, with her death, they found out that the tumors were explosive.
After the death of Dr Hewston, they called in Dr Watson. Carson decided, despite protests from both Rodney and John, to operate on him. The operation was a great success and everything went well. However, as Carson went to deliver the tumour to its final resting place it exploded and Carson was killed.
That was the final straw for Rodney. He felt something deep in his soul shatter. In that one moment he had lost his best friend. He had lost the person that he saw as his confidant, the person who he could confide in. In that one moment his world was changed. And he knew that he would never be the same.
When he thought back to that moment, he was filled with guilt and what ifs. If he had gone with Carson would he still have been alive? Of course, someone else would’ve died, but it wouldn’t have been him.
The worst part of it all was having to pack all Carson’s things away. All that was left of his friend was personal effects. His smile, his kindness, his love, his bedside manner all gone because of the fact that the Ancients didn’t bother to clean up after themselves. As Rodney packed it all away, he felt a little bit of himself go in to each box and the emptiness that he felt deep inside grew. When they took Carson’s coffin through the gate , Rodney knew that there was a bit of him that went with him and it hurt.
After Carson had gone Rodney found himself being his usual self with his friends and colleagues. But when he was alone, he felt the emptiness deep inside.
“Carson I miss you. Dr Keller is good at her job, but she’s just not you. I’m sorry that I didn’t come fishing with you. Maybe if I had of done, you would still be here. I hope that you can forgive me.”
Rodney stood on the pier and looked out to sea and whispered, “I’m sorry.”
A/n This is not beta'd so all mistakes are mine. And I have no rights to Rodney even though I would love to.