Time To Talk
WHO: Brittany Pierce and Santana Lopez
WHAT: Time for a Talk
WHERE: Pierce Residence
WHEN: January 30, 2012
WARNING: Sexytimes ahead.
Brittany was glad that, with the exception of Lord Tubbington, they would have the house to themselves. What had happened on New Year’s Eve, as amazing as it had seemed at the time, was pulling her apart inside and she really needed to let her feelings out. She hated bullying Santana into meeting, but she also knew it was the only way they were ever going to talk about it. She sat anxiously on the couch, in the dark, trying not to lose her nerve. “Quiet!” she hissed at Lord Tubbs. “You’re not helping anything. You’re just making it worse.”
Santana was uncharacteristically nervous as she made her way to Brittany’s front door. She didn’t really want to be talking about this, but she knew she couldn’t really avoid it. Maybe she could just convince Britt that it wasn’t anything other than it had been. A kiss at midnight. She rang the bell and took a step back, taking a deep breath.
The house had been completely silent until the bell rang, and it made Brittany jump. She turned on a couple of lights, not wanting Santana to have to sit in the dark like she’d been, and walked slowly to the front door. Normally she’d have run, probably bounced a little, but this was different. This was scary. And she really didn’t know what was going to happen. So slow was the way to proceed. She opened the door wide, stepping back so Santana could come in. “Hey,” she worried at her bottom lip with her teeth. “I - I’m really glad you came.”
Seeing Brittany so nervous kicked Santana in the gut. She walked into the house and slipped off her sneakers before heading straight to the living room. “Of course I came. Why wouldn’t I?” She asked quietly. She sat down on the couch and rest her hands in her lap.
“I, um,” she cleared her throat. “I don’t know, I just wasn’t sure that you’d - want to talk about this, I guess? I thought maybe you’d just...say you were busy, or something...” Brittany sighed, running a hand through her hair. “I’m not making sense at all, am I?”
Santana shook her head. “No, you’re not wrong. I don’t want to talk about this, but I think it’s important for you. So, we should.” Her stomach felt knotted just at the thought. Now, she couldn’t pretend that she hadn’t been affected by it. Now, she her mind wouldn’t stop thinking about what it felt like when they’d kissed.
“I just...” this was so hard. These were thoughts that she didn’t know how to say out loud, and she was hopelessly confused by everything running through her head. “I need to know, I guess,” she swallowed, “what it means - what it meant to you. Because,” she was pouring her heart out now, and she just hoped she could make sense, “because ever since I realized how I felt about girls, I’ve wanted that kiss, San. I dreamed about it. I wished for it. And then it happened, and it was the best thing I’ve ever felt. Like the whole world was magic for a second. But since then, you act,” her voice quivered a little, “you act like it didn’t matter. Like it was nothing. And if that’s true,” she tried to keep from crying, she didn’t want to do that now, but the tears came all the same, “if it’s true then I need you to tell me. If that one kiss is all I’m ever going to get...just tell me. So I don’t think about more. So I don’t wish that we could do it again.” Her voice was thick, and she tried to clear her throat. “Just tell me the truth,” she finished in a shaky whisper.
Heart beating wildly, Santana tamped down on her need to bolt. This is exactly what she hadn’t wanted to have happen, but now it had. She didn’t want to hurt Brittany at all. Now, everything was fucked up. She buried her face in her hands for a moment and let out a sigh. “I don’t know, Brittany. I don’t know what to say. Like...I had been thinking about kissing you for like a month and then all of a sudden you were gay and kissing me and...I’m not gay, B. But of course it meant something to me. You’re Brittany and I’m me...and it’ll always mean something. I don’t want to kiss Quinn. I didn’t even think about it. All I thought about was kissing you and then we did.” She stopped her stream of words and forced herself to look at Brittany. She steeled her nerves because Brittany didn’t need her to be a mess right now even if she was scared shitless at all the stuff she’d just said and what it meant because she hadn’t let herself even think those things, let alone say them.
I’m not gay. The words clanged like a bell in Brittany’s head, and she tried not to lose the rest of what Santana was saying. It was important, and she couldn’t afford to focus too much on one part and miss the rest of it. She’d been thinking about kissing her - that had to mean something, right? If it wasn’t even possible for them to be...more than friends, then why would she have thought about it? “I don’t,” she shook her head, “I don’t understand, San. I’m sorry, I know I’m not smart, but I can’t...I need you to explain. If you’re not gay, but you wanted to kiss me - what does that mean? Can we be - girlfriends? Or is that just it? We...we kiss when nobody else is there, and that’s all? I’m sorry,” she repeated, biting her lip, “I just don’t understand.”
Santana sucked in a breath at the word girlfriends and shook her head again. “I-I don’t think girlfriends...I’m not ready to be anyone’s girlfriend and Britt, I’m not even sure I like girls at all. But I did like the kiss, okay? It was a good kiss. Top twenty of kisses,” she said with a small smile as her eyes caught Brittany’s. “I don’t know. Like Britt, I like having you as my best friend. But we only kissed like one time and I liked it, but I don’t know if that means...well more than that.”
Brittany was silent for a long couple of moments as she tried to think all of that through. She didn’t want to just blurt out what was on her mind, because she wasn’t even sure what would come out. “It was a good kiss,” she finally said, softly. She was lost and adrift in that moment, trying to decide how to go on. “I like having you as my best friend too,” she finally decided on. “And it doesn’t - it doesn’t have to mean more than that.” Saying that aloud was like being kicked in the stomach, but she didn’t want Santana to think she was trying to make her something she wasn’t. “We can just say it was nice, and leave it alone if that’s what we want to do. I only wanted to know, that’s all. Now that I know,” she rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand, “it’s okay. Thank you,” she added automatically, “for explaining.” Giving her best attempt at a smile, she sat back against the couch with a soft sigh.
The blonde was disappointed and Santana hated that. Hated disappointing her. “You want it to be more...I...we should kiss again, if you want,” Santana suggested, her stomach flipping for an entirely different reason. “I want to know if it was just a one time thing or if I just...but only if you want, Britt, and only if it’s not just going to confuse you more.”
Frowning a little, Brittany thought it through. “I do,” she admitted, “I won’t lie and say I didn’t have super-happy dreams about holding your hand in the hallways. But if that’s not what you want, I won’t try and make you.” The frown vanished as she thought about another kiss. “But I’d totally kiss you again, though. Now that I get what it means...doesn’t mean...whatever, I can just kiss you because I want to. I won’t think it means anything except a kiss,” she promised. “Okay?”
Santana wanted to argue that Brittany didn’t really actually get it completely, but she also didn’t want to talk about it anymore. Nodding, she moved closer to Brittany and hesitated before lowering her mouth until their lips were barely touching and their breath mingled. “You’re my best friend and you’ll always be my best friend,” Santana promised more to herself than to Brittany. “Sometimes friends makeout and do stuff...like me and Puck. It’s better that way.”
Brittany sort of wished she hadn’t mentioned Puck, because it was kind of hard to focus on the soft lips near hers when the image of a boy had been planted in her brain. But she tried her best to shake it off. “You’re my best friend too, San - forever.” She wasn’t sure why it was better if friends made out and weren’t boyfriends or girlfriends, but as long as she got to kiss Santana she wasn’t going to think too much about it right now. Instead she cleared her mind and pressed her lips to her friend’s, trying to hold in a little noise of pleasure that seemed to come all the way from her toes. This was the best thing in the world - the best thing she’d ever felt. And in that moment, she made a promise to herself. She’d do this however Santana wanted, because she couldn’t stand the thought of not doing it again.
It was like a jolt and she made a soft noise as their lips moved together slowly. She had a moment of panic because this kiss made its way through her like fire and she just wasn’t used to that. Her hand came up and wrapped around the back of Brittany’s neck as she deepened the kiss. She parted her lips a little, letting her tongue slip out to tease the other girl’s bottom lip.
“Mmm...” Brittany whimpered softly at the feeling of Santana’s tongue. She was amazed, just like she’d been on New Year’s Eve, at how her whole body seemed to react to just a kiss. She’d never felt anything like it before that night, and she hadn’t felt it since - until right now. She let her lips part, just a little, to let the teasing touch become something deeper - if Santana wanted it to. She was way less sure of what she was doing, so it would probably be better to let her dictate the pace.
Santana licked into Brittany’s mouth, letting her instincts take over. This was the part she was good at. Her body had always just kind of known what to do. And she could do this because it hadn’t been a fluke. She liked doing this with Brittany and they were just friends. She pushed at Brittany’s shoulders and half-climbed onto her lap, her right knee between the blonde’s legs. She slid her tongue along Brittany’s and moaned.
Tongue. Santana’s tongue. In her mouth. Brittany’s brain was communicating with her body, but the messages were garbled at best. Her body was just reacting, and her brain was left trying to play catch up. So she didn’t try. She just let it happen. Her tongue found Santana’s, tracing a slow path down the length of it. It felt - there weren’t any words that could describe it. And then she was being pushed back, and she jumped as the knee between her legs brushed something that lit her whole body up like a Christmas tree. Her moan was so much louder than before, and she was glad that Santana’s mouth was on hers. Not that there was anyone around to hear it, but it was a little bit embarrassing to be making sounds she couldn’t control.
Brittany’s moan made Santana’s...everything clench. It wasn’t that she wasn’t used to being turned on, but usually it was Puck that was doing it. Brittany sounded way better than Puck ever had and rocked her center against the thigh she was straddling. She pulled back a little to gasp for air, nipping lightly at Brittany’s bottom lip. She whimpered as she pressed down again, her eyes hooded as she looked up into Brittany’s.
Oh wow, was the most coherent thing in Brittany’s head. Watching Santana...bounce like that, feeling the heat of her against her leg, hearing the sounds she was making...she wished she could stay right here in this moment forever. “San,” she murmured when they broke for air, trying to say everything with that single word. The nip to her lip made her gasp, and she decided to try and emulate what her friend was doing by shifting down until Santana’s knee was against that spot again, the one that had made her moan. As soon as there was contact she cried out softly, and thought she understood exactly what to do next. She rocked a little against her knee, whimpering and crushing her lips against Santana’s as an amazing array of feelings washed over her. She’d never felt anything like this when she had tried to...help herself, and she didn’t know how it was going to feel when she finally...felt what she’d read about. But if it was better than this, she couldn’t imagine how.
Fuck, this was hot and Santana didn’t quite know what to do about it. Her body, her need, was taking over her rational thoughts. Like they should probably slow down because they had already surpassed the “I just wanted to see if I liked it” part like eight kisses ago, but Brittany was pressing against her and she was riding the hell out of Brittany’s leg. So, she couldn’t exactly stop. Growling, she pushed her tongue back into Brittany’s mouth deeply and pushed her thigh against her even more.
What it all meant, what would happen when it was over - none of those questions were bothering Brittany anymore. They were banished from her head by an aching need, one that drowned out everything else and made her blood pound in her ears. As she rocked back and forth against Santana’s knee and sucked gently at her tongue, she could feel something spiralling up inside her that was completely out of her control. The kiss broke as her head fell back against the couch and she gasped for breath. “San,” she whimpered. She felt completely out of control, lost in feelings and sensations. And then, with the last movement of her hips, it felt like something snapped inside her and she saw bright lights behind her eyes. She didn’t know if she was screaming, or if it was her imagination, but it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered, everything went away for a minute. When she could finally open her eyes, she looked dazedly at Santana. “That...” she whispered, “was awesome...”
Watching Brittany’s face as she came was probably one of the most amazing things Santana had seen in a long time. She bit her bottom lip, pressing down a final time before her hips jerked and she exploded with a tiny whimper. Her body shook as she clenched, but she buried her face in Brittany’s neck, her eyes screwing shut as the waves of pleasure crashed over her. When she calmed, she just lay there, her arms loosely around the taller girl. “Yeah,” she said thickly. She swallowed hard around the dryness in the her throat. “That was really good,” she whispered.
Suddenly the questions were back - all of them. But Brittany was not going to let anything spoil this moment, what they’d just shared. She’d never felt anything like that, and if she and Santana were only going to be friends who did this sometimes, then fine. She could live with that. So she let herself bask in the afterglow, planting soft kisses on Santana’s cheeks and then a firmer one on her lips. “You’re beautiful,” she murmured. Leaning back, she pulled her friend down on top of her. “Can we just lay here for a while?”
Santana’s mind was racing. What the fuck did all of this mean? She’d just gotten off with and on Brittany and it had felt pretty fucking awesome. She loved sex just as much as most people, but this had felt better than some of the guys she’d been with. Still that didn’t mean she was gay, she reasoned. Maybe they just sucked. And maybe Brittany was just good. Or she was good with Brittany. Either way, she was having a mild freak out, but was just too tired to do anything other than push it out of her mind. “Mhm...”she murmured, laying her head on Brittany’s shoulder.
In that moment, on the couch in her living room, Brittany made a firm decision. One that she would stick to, no matter what. Santana didn’t want to be girlfriends. She wanted to stay friends. And they could do this sometimes. So she resolved to take all of those feelings, all the ones that insisted and nagged that they should be something more, and pushed them into a closet in her brain. Then she locked the door. She should be thankful for what she had, not greedy enough to ask for more on top of it. This was the way it was going to be, and she was determined to be happy about it. “So,” she whispered, “how long do we have to wait before we do that again? Is it like swimming, where you’re supposed to wait a half hour or something?”
Laughing, Santana slid off of her lap and pulled her knees to her chest as she sat back on the couch. “You can do it as much as you want. It’s not that way with guys, but girls are pretty lucky like that I guess.” She couldn’t speak for other girls, but she could hump for hours. “I just...” she said with a little shrug. “I need a moment because that was kind of intense.”
As much as you want sounded like a very good answer to Brittany, who grinned. She leaned over and laid her head on Santana’s shoulder with a contented sigh. “Well,” she smiled, “just tell me when you’re ready.”
WHAT: Time for a Talk
WHERE: Pierce Residence
WHEN: January 30, 2012
WARNING: Sexytimes ahead.
Brittany was glad that, with the exception of Lord Tubbington, they would have the house to themselves. What had happened on New Year’s Eve, as amazing as it had seemed at the time, was pulling her apart inside and she really needed to let her feelings out. She hated bullying Santana into meeting, but she also knew it was the only way they were ever going to talk about it. She sat anxiously on the couch, in the dark, trying not to lose her nerve. “Quiet!” she hissed at Lord Tubbs. “You’re not helping anything. You’re just making it worse.”
Santana was uncharacteristically nervous as she made her way to Brittany’s front door. She didn’t really want to be talking about this, but she knew she couldn’t really avoid it. Maybe she could just convince Britt that it wasn’t anything other than it had been. A kiss at midnight. She rang the bell and took a step back, taking a deep breath.
The house had been completely silent until the bell rang, and it made Brittany jump. She turned on a couple of lights, not wanting Santana to have to sit in the dark like she’d been, and walked slowly to the front door. Normally she’d have run, probably bounced a little, but this was different. This was scary. And she really didn’t know what was going to happen. So slow was the way to proceed. She opened the door wide, stepping back so Santana could come in. “Hey,” she worried at her bottom lip with her teeth. “I - I’m really glad you came.”
Seeing Brittany so nervous kicked Santana in the gut. She walked into the house and slipped off her sneakers before heading straight to the living room. “Of course I came. Why wouldn’t I?” She asked quietly. She sat down on the couch and rest her hands in her lap.
“I, um,” she cleared her throat. “I don’t know, I just wasn’t sure that you’d - want to talk about this, I guess? I thought maybe you’d just...say you were busy, or something...” Brittany sighed, running a hand through her hair. “I’m not making sense at all, am I?”
Santana shook her head. “No, you’re not wrong. I don’t want to talk about this, but I think it’s important for you. So, we should.” Her stomach felt knotted just at the thought. Now, she couldn’t pretend that she hadn’t been affected by it. Now, she her mind wouldn’t stop thinking about what it felt like when they’d kissed.
“I just...” this was so hard. These were thoughts that she didn’t know how to say out loud, and she was hopelessly confused by everything running through her head. “I need to know, I guess,” she swallowed, “what it means - what it meant to you. Because,” she was pouring her heart out now, and she just hoped she could make sense, “because ever since I realized how I felt about girls, I’ve wanted that kiss, San. I dreamed about it. I wished for it. And then it happened, and it was the best thing I’ve ever felt. Like the whole world was magic for a second. But since then, you act,” her voice quivered a little, “you act like it didn’t matter. Like it was nothing. And if that’s true,” she tried to keep from crying, she didn’t want to do that now, but the tears came all the same, “if it’s true then I need you to tell me. If that one kiss is all I’m ever going to get...just tell me. So I don’t think about more. So I don’t wish that we could do it again.” Her voice was thick, and she tried to clear her throat. “Just tell me the truth,” she finished in a shaky whisper.
Heart beating wildly, Santana tamped down on her need to bolt. This is exactly what she hadn’t wanted to have happen, but now it had. She didn’t want to hurt Brittany at all. Now, everything was fucked up. She buried her face in her hands for a moment and let out a sigh. “I don’t know, Brittany. I don’t know what to say. Like...I had been thinking about kissing you for like a month and then all of a sudden you were gay and kissing me and...I’m not gay, B. But of course it meant something to me. You’re Brittany and I’m me...and it’ll always mean something. I don’t want to kiss Quinn. I didn’t even think about it. All I thought about was kissing you and then we did.” She stopped her stream of words and forced herself to look at Brittany. She steeled her nerves because Brittany didn’t need her to be a mess right now even if she was scared shitless at all the stuff she’d just said and what it meant because she hadn’t let herself even think those things, let alone say them.
I’m not gay. The words clanged like a bell in Brittany’s head, and she tried not to lose the rest of what Santana was saying. It was important, and she couldn’t afford to focus too much on one part and miss the rest of it. She’d been thinking about kissing her - that had to mean something, right? If it wasn’t even possible for them to be...more than friends, then why would she have thought about it? “I don’t,” she shook her head, “I don’t understand, San. I’m sorry, I know I’m not smart, but I can’t...I need you to explain. If you’re not gay, but you wanted to kiss me - what does that mean? Can we be - girlfriends? Or is that just it? We...we kiss when nobody else is there, and that’s all? I’m sorry,” she repeated, biting her lip, “I just don’t understand.”
Santana sucked in a breath at the word girlfriends and shook her head again. “I-I don’t think girlfriends...I’m not ready to be anyone’s girlfriend and Britt, I’m not even sure I like girls at all. But I did like the kiss, okay? It was a good kiss. Top twenty of kisses,” she said with a small smile as her eyes caught Brittany’s. “I don’t know. Like Britt, I like having you as my best friend. But we only kissed like one time and I liked it, but I don’t know if that means...well more than that.”
Brittany was silent for a long couple of moments as she tried to think all of that through. She didn’t want to just blurt out what was on her mind, because she wasn’t even sure what would come out. “It was a good kiss,” she finally said, softly. She was lost and adrift in that moment, trying to decide how to go on. “I like having you as my best friend too,” she finally decided on. “And it doesn’t - it doesn’t have to mean more than that.” Saying that aloud was like being kicked in the stomach, but she didn’t want Santana to think she was trying to make her something she wasn’t. “We can just say it was nice, and leave it alone if that’s what we want to do. I only wanted to know, that’s all. Now that I know,” she rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand, “it’s okay. Thank you,” she added automatically, “for explaining.” Giving her best attempt at a smile, she sat back against the couch with a soft sigh.
The blonde was disappointed and Santana hated that. Hated disappointing her. “You want it to be more...I...we should kiss again, if you want,” Santana suggested, her stomach flipping for an entirely different reason. “I want to know if it was just a one time thing or if I just...but only if you want, Britt, and only if it’s not just going to confuse you more.”
Frowning a little, Brittany thought it through. “I do,” she admitted, “I won’t lie and say I didn’t have super-happy dreams about holding your hand in the hallways. But if that’s not what you want, I won’t try and make you.” The frown vanished as she thought about another kiss. “But I’d totally kiss you again, though. Now that I get what it means...doesn’t mean...whatever, I can just kiss you because I want to. I won’t think it means anything except a kiss,” she promised. “Okay?”
Santana wanted to argue that Brittany didn’t really actually get it completely, but she also didn’t want to talk about it anymore. Nodding, she moved closer to Brittany and hesitated before lowering her mouth until their lips were barely touching and their breath mingled. “You’re my best friend and you’ll always be my best friend,” Santana promised more to herself than to Brittany. “Sometimes friends makeout and do stuff...like me and Puck. It’s better that way.”
Brittany sort of wished she hadn’t mentioned Puck, because it was kind of hard to focus on the soft lips near hers when the image of a boy had been planted in her brain. But she tried her best to shake it off. “You’re my best friend too, San - forever.” She wasn’t sure why it was better if friends made out and weren’t boyfriends or girlfriends, but as long as she got to kiss Santana she wasn’t going to think too much about it right now. Instead she cleared her mind and pressed her lips to her friend’s, trying to hold in a little noise of pleasure that seemed to come all the way from her toes. This was the best thing in the world - the best thing she’d ever felt. And in that moment, she made a promise to herself. She’d do this however Santana wanted, because she couldn’t stand the thought of not doing it again.
It was like a jolt and she made a soft noise as their lips moved together slowly. She had a moment of panic because this kiss made its way through her like fire and she just wasn’t used to that. Her hand came up and wrapped around the back of Brittany’s neck as she deepened the kiss. She parted her lips a little, letting her tongue slip out to tease the other girl’s bottom lip.
“Mmm...” Brittany whimpered softly at the feeling of Santana’s tongue. She was amazed, just like she’d been on New Year’s Eve, at how her whole body seemed to react to just a kiss. She’d never felt anything like it before that night, and she hadn’t felt it since - until right now. She let her lips part, just a little, to let the teasing touch become something deeper - if Santana wanted it to. She was way less sure of what she was doing, so it would probably be better to let her dictate the pace.
Santana licked into Brittany’s mouth, letting her instincts take over. This was the part she was good at. Her body had always just kind of known what to do. And she could do this because it hadn’t been a fluke. She liked doing this with Brittany and they were just friends. She pushed at Brittany’s shoulders and half-climbed onto her lap, her right knee between the blonde’s legs. She slid her tongue along Brittany’s and moaned.
Tongue. Santana’s tongue. In her mouth. Brittany’s brain was communicating with her body, but the messages were garbled at best. Her body was just reacting, and her brain was left trying to play catch up. So she didn’t try. She just let it happen. Her tongue found Santana’s, tracing a slow path down the length of it. It felt - there weren’t any words that could describe it. And then she was being pushed back, and she jumped as the knee between her legs brushed something that lit her whole body up like a Christmas tree. Her moan was so much louder than before, and she was glad that Santana’s mouth was on hers. Not that there was anyone around to hear it, but it was a little bit embarrassing to be making sounds she couldn’t control.
Brittany’s moan made Santana’s...everything clench. It wasn’t that she wasn’t used to being turned on, but usually it was Puck that was doing it. Brittany sounded way better than Puck ever had and rocked her center against the thigh she was straddling. She pulled back a little to gasp for air, nipping lightly at Brittany’s bottom lip. She whimpered as she pressed down again, her eyes hooded as she looked up into Brittany’s.
Oh wow, was the most coherent thing in Brittany’s head. Watching Santana...bounce like that, feeling the heat of her against her leg, hearing the sounds she was making...she wished she could stay right here in this moment forever. “San,” she murmured when they broke for air, trying to say everything with that single word. The nip to her lip made her gasp, and she decided to try and emulate what her friend was doing by shifting down until Santana’s knee was against that spot again, the one that had made her moan. As soon as there was contact she cried out softly, and thought she understood exactly what to do next. She rocked a little against her knee, whimpering and crushing her lips against Santana’s as an amazing array of feelings washed over her. She’d never felt anything like this when she had tried to...help herself, and she didn’t know how it was going to feel when she finally...felt what she’d read about. But if it was better than this, she couldn’t imagine how.
Fuck, this was hot and Santana didn’t quite know what to do about it. Her body, her need, was taking over her rational thoughts. Like they should probably slow down because they had already surpassed the “I just wanted to see if I liked it” part like eight kisses ago, but Brittany was pressing against her and she was riding the hell out of Brittany’s leg. So, she couldn’t exactly stop. Growling, she pushed her tongue back into Brittany’s mouth deeply and pushed her thigh against her even more.
What it all meant, what would happen when it was over - none of those questions were bothering Brittany anymore. They were banished from her head by an aching need, one that drowned out everything else and made her blood pound in her ears. As she rocked back and forth against Santana’s knee and sucked gently at her tongue, she could feel something spiralling up inside her that was completely out of her control. The kiss broke as her head fell back against the couch and she gasped for breath. “San,” she whimpered. She felt completely out of control, lost in feelings and sensations. And then, with the last movement of her hips, it felt like something snapped inside her and she saw bright lights behind her eyes. She didn’t know if she was screaming, or if it was her imagination, but it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered, everything went away for a minute. When she could finally open her eyes, she looked dazedly at Santana. “That...” she whispered, “was awesome...”
Watching Brittany’s face as she came was probably one of the most amazing things Santana had seen in a long time. She bit her bottom lip, pressing down a final time before her hips jerked and she exploded with a tiny whimper. Her body shook as she clenched, but she buried her face in Brittany’s neck, her eyes screwing shut as the waves of pleasure crashed over her. When she calmed, she just lay there, her arms loosely around the taller girl. “Yeah,” she said thickly. She swallowed hard around the dryness in the her throat. “That was really good,” she whispered.
Suddenly the questions were back - all of them. But Brittany was not going to let anything spoil this moment, what they’d just shared. She’d never felt anything like that, and if she and Santana were only going to be friends who did this sometimes, then fine. She could live with that. So she let herself bask in the afterglow, planting soft kisses on Santana’s cheeks and then a firmer one on her lips. “You’re beautiful,” she murmured. Leaning back, she pulled her friend down on top of her. “Can we just lay here for a while?”
Santana’s mind was racing. What the fuck did all of this mean? She’d just gotten off with and on Brittany and it had felt pretty fucking awesome. She loved sex just as much as most people, but this had felt better than some of the guys she’d been with. Still that didn’t mean she was gay, she reasoned. Maybe they just sucked. And maybe Brittany was just good. Or she was good with Brittany. Either way, she was having a mild freak out, but was just too tired to do anything other than push it out of her mind. “Mhm...”she murmured, laying her head on Brittany’s shoulder.
In that moment, on the couch in her living room, Brittany made a firm decision. One that she would stick to, no matter what. Santana didn’t want to be girlfriends. She wanted to stay friends. And they could do this sometimes. So she resolved to take all of those feelings, all the ones that insisted and nagged that they should be something more, and pushed them into a closet in her brain. Then she locked the door. She should be thankful for what she had, not greedy enough to ask for more on top of it. This was the way it was going to be, and she was determined to be happy about it. “So,” she whispered, “how long do we have to wait before we do that again? Is it like swimming, where you’re supposed to wait a half hour or something?”
Laughing, Santana slid off of her lap and pulled her knees to her chest as she sat back on the couch. “You can do it as much as you want. It’s not that way with guys, but girls are pretty lucky like that I guess.” She couldn’t speak for other girls, but she could hump for hours. “I just...” she said with a little shrug. “I need a moment because that was kind of intense.”
As much as you want sounded like a very good answer to Brittany, who grinned. She leaned over and laid her head on Santana’s shoulder with a contented sigh. “Well,” she smiled, “just tell me when you’re ready.”