Lost and Found
I've had a lot of people from my past pop back into my life lately. From gradeschool to random ex-boyfriends. It tears me apart, though, that those old, near-and dear friends have slipped away. And of course, I am referencing a specific group of four.
One doesn't speak to me anymore because, I believe, I do not hold the same beliefs as she does.
One does not acknowledge my presence further than accepting me on facebook because, again, I hold different beliefs.
One hasn't spoken to me since September 11, 2001. When I called to make sure he was ok. But I hear he is happy now that he has stepped out of the wardrobe closet. Sure, i drunk dialed his house a few times, but hey, it happens.
And one has simply disappeared, into the wild world of somewhere. We had been friends for 11 years, yet I have not had the chance to say hi to him in quite a few months. I don't even think he knows I got married. Which makes me sad inside. Sure, over the years, I have been pessimistic, sad, clinically depressed, and down right crazy. But I'm a Taurus rising. It's my second nature- right after having that royalty complex. I've been trying to get a hold of him via email/IM/LJ....something...to let him know. I was recently hired on at the same company he works for, at the call center level. His store actually called CCC the other day, coming through my extention. I kinda laughed and thought, 'damn, i really haven't spoken to him in forever! He doesn't even know I'm married!' And it kinda made me sad. By the way, I think your BB are expiring.
And one honorable mention....someone who was the touchstone to my hero. He's making the chash nowadays down in NZ, and he has no time for the frivilous chatter he used to. Those delightfully surprising comments and thrilling looks into the head of the one man who has been a part of my life since I was 8.
It kind of pisses me off that people can change. That people have no need for their friends after a while. That i've seen so many people fall out of love with literature and characters and times and places they once loved. But i still love them all. I am devoutly loyal to the home I've never been to, the one friend who has never left me, the symbol permanently carved on my back, the name i've had for 7 years.
I may now be Lu Nawata, but I still stand under the Red and Green rampant flag.
One doesn't speak to me anymore because, I believe, I do not hold the same beliefs as she does.
One does not acknowledge my presence further than accepting me on facebook because, again, I hold different beliefs.
One hasn't spoken to me since September 11, 2001. When I called to make sure he was ok. But I hear he is happy now that he has stepped out of the wardrobe closet. Sure, i drunk dialed his house a few times, but hey, it happens.
And one has simply disappeared, into the wild world of somewhere. We had been friends for 11 years, yet I have not had the chance to say hi to him in quite a few months. I don't even think he knows I got married. Which makes me sad inside. Sure, over the years, I have been pessimistic, sad, clinically depressed, and down right crazy. But I'm a Taurus rising. It's my second nature- right after having that royalty complex. I've been trying to get a hold of him via email/IM/LJ....something...to let him know. I was recently hired on at the same company he works for, at the call center level. His store actually called CCC the other day, coming through my extention. I kinda laughed and thought, 'damn, i really haven't spoken to him in forever! He doesn't even know I'm married!' And it kinda made me sad. By the way, I think your BB are expiring.
And one honorable mention....someone who was the touchstone to my hero. He's making the chash nowadays down in NZ, and he has no time for the frivilous chatter he used to. Those delightfully surprising comments and thrilling looks into the head of the one man who has been a part of my life since I was 8.
It kind of pisses me off that people can change. That people have no need for their friends after a while. That i've seen so many people fall out of love with literature and characters and times and places they once loved. But i still love them all. I am devoutly loyal to the home I've never been to, the one friend who has never left me, the symbol permanently carved on my back, the name i've had for 7 years.
I may now be Lu Nawata, but I still stand under the Red and Green rampant flag.