FAN FICTION POST: "Fool's Gold", one-shot (Pirates of the Caribbean)

[flowrs4ophelia]

Title: Fool's Gold
Author: Sara C. paintedponyxox@flowrs4ophelia)
Characters/Pairings: Jack/Elizabeth, Will
Rating: PG
Summary: They play their old games, but there is never a winner or a prize.
Notes: Post-AWE with spoilers.

Comments

[ninety6tears]

Loved this. So sad, it makes you feel trapped. I especially like the repetition of the, "He is not here." It could mean so many things.

Sometimes she is part of the crew. Sometimes she is just there. And she will stay until one of them does something to give them reason to pretend to be enemies again and she either knows she has worn out her welcome or is too angry to stay. Then in another few months, she will be back. They play their old games this way, each perhaps a little afraid of when the game will be over.
^This was nicely written, and explained a lot of complexities in only a few sentences.

[flowrs4ophelia]

I guess there was no dire need for you to beta this, after all. I was too impatient to get it posted, LOL.

So sad, it makes you feel trapped. I'm really glad it evokes that feeling. All the characters are suffering in their own way, some because they think there is some great reward that will eventually come, and are restraining themselves from acting certain ways. But at the end, they have just wasted ten years going after...well, fool's gold. They lived for so long imagining what they were going to get that the real prize ended up not living up to it.

I especially like the repetition of the, "He is not here." It could mean so many things. Yayz, I'm glad you caught this, too. When I said, "But not Will. He is not here," it could mean, She doesn't want to have a miniature Will around when he's not here, reminding her of that. Or it could be a tiny bitterness about the fact that she's been left alone, so even though his son is technically named for him she doesn't want to give him that complete honor and just calls him Billy

[ninety6tears]

I felt like Elizabeth was bitter at Will for not being there because it made it so much harder for her to choose him. It comes through a lot in this story that maybe she's just angry with herself.

[flowrs4ophelia]

Well yeah, and I also wanted to give the idea that if it weren't for the fact that Will couldn't be there for her at all, Jack probably would not have kept being such a big part of her life. Will comes back and realizes that in his absense Jack has become a father figure to his son in a way, and now he also has known Elizabeth through those ten years and how she's not exactly the same person. Who would be after ten years, especially with the experience of becoming a mom added in there? Will probably isn't the same, either.

A lot of this story was inspired by some quote someone mentioned in sparrabeth about why long-distance relationships don't work because over time each person just develops an idealized, fake image of the other and then when they actually meet they feel uncomfortable and like they are with a stranger. In a most unfortunate way (for Will), Jack has come to know her a lot better than he does (which he...ahem...always did, but you know...lol). So the idea is the reward you get in the end, after the wait or the search, isn't what

[hafren]

I like how she stays herself.

[flowrs4ophelia]

Thanks! I definitely think Elizabeth spent those ten years being more of an active single mom type than a housewife.

[jakjk32]

Yes, it does make one feel trapped.

I'm going to have to read something happy now.
But I'll know that this was the better (written) thing.

All the same, that was amazing.
=)

[flowrs4ophelia]

Sorry, it's kinda sad, isn't it? :(

Thanks very much! :)

[tanith75]

I am totally in love with your icon :)

[sbkisses]

Wonderful. Short but very poignant. I loved how you managed to relate the emotions of separation, delicately but realisticly illustrating Elizabeth's deteriorating relationship with Will and her ever growing bond with Jack, made especially strong through her son.

AWESOME! ^___^

[flowrs4ophelia]

Thank you! :D

[flowrs4ophelia]

Thanks! :)