(no subject)
Old private post i decided to make public:
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I was sitting in a bus last night coming from hockey. It was around midnight, when the terrential rain was really coming down. Looking around me, everything seemed wierd. I don't know if that's the right word to describe it. I guess i've been feeling wierd for the past couple of weeks. Well, looking through the window, with the water tricking down the outside of the windows, i felt as if i was in a fishtank, except it was the opposite. Water on the outside of the tank, with me in it. I started thinking of death, and the realization of how soon it will come. I started wondering if i would fear it when I was old. I started wondering wheather old people are scared of death. I guess if you do grow up to be that old, and live those many years, you'd have a feeling of completion, and the urge to move on to the next stage in this cycle. I wondered how someone, staring at the inevitable hand of death would feel. Maybed I've marred my brain by looking at too many things. Looking at all the bad things of humanity. Heh, that's the internet for you. But i mean i've seen death in so many forms, and i've been getting somewhat fascinated by how people feel when they know they are going to die. I was watching this one video of this iraqi man having explosives wired on him, and just standing there in a pit. Motionless. Knowing exactly what is going to happen.
Why doesn't he get up and run?
I guess the parlysing fear of the what is coming probably disables him from doing anything.
When i think of this, i think of life in the perspective of other people. One life, regardless of how it is ended, is still a life. Still a life equal to all other lives. I mean, if you take one life, do the other one's matter? Doesn't that iraqi man's life, albeit he did what he did to recieve this punishment (child rapist in saddam's regime), equal all the other ones? And if it does, his non existance, makes everyone else non existant. He is not going to care about anything esle, because he is dead. We see life through our eyes, so if one dies, everything ends in the eyes of that person.
Eh, a sad attemp to express some of my thoughts.
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I was sitting in a bus last night coming from hockey. It was around midnight, when the terrential rain was really coming down. Looking around me, everything seemed wierd. I don't know if that's the right word to describe it. I guess i've been feeling wierd for the past couple of weeks. Well, looking through the window, with the water tricking down the outside of the windows, i felt as if i was in a fishtank, except it was the opposite. Water on the outside of the tank, with me in it. I started thinking of death, and the realization of how soon it will come. I started wondering if i would fear it when I was old. I started wondering wheather old people are scared of death. I guess if you do grow up to be that old, and live those many years, you'd have a feeling of completion, and the urge to move on to the next stage in this cycle. I wondered how someone, staring at the inevitable hand of death would feel. Maybed I've marred my brain by looking at too many things. Looking at all the bad things of humanity. Heh, that's the internet for you. But i mean i've seen death in so many forms, and i've been getting somewhat fascinated by how people feel when they know they are going to die. I was watching this one video of this iraqi man having explosives wired on him, and just standing there in a pit. Motionless. Knowing exactly what is going to happen.
Why doesn't he get up and run?
I guess the parlysing fear of the what is coming probably disables him from doing anything.
When i think of this, i think of life in the perspective of other people. One life, regardless of how it is ended, is still a life. Still a life equal to all other lives. I mean, if you take one life, do the other one's matter? Doesn't that iraqi man's life, albeit he did what he did to recieve this punishment (child rapist in saddam's regime), equal all the other ones? And if it does, his non existance, makes everyone else non existant. He is not going to care about anything esle, because he is dead. We see life through our eyes, so if one dies, everything ends in the eyes of that person.
Eh, a sad attemp to express some of my thoughts.