Excuse the last post... Here is a real one.
Over the past few weeks I've been doing a lot of thinking about who my friends really are and what impact they have on my life. I've been able to deduce that... Most of my friends don't even know who I am and/or don't really care.
It is strange, however, that I'm not more broken up about the whole deal. I've spent most of my life trying to help friends through the shit in their lives that 90% of them just cause themselves to be reminded that they are in fact alive. I'm tired. I'm not dealing with it anymore.
It is time for the asshole to come back. Time for me to not give a shit what people think of me. Time for me to say "Fuck off" to all those people who just use me for emotional support but don't give a flying fuck if I actually have a problem and need someone to talk too. The realization I have is... They are never there for me... so do I actually need someone to talk too? I guess not.
This really takes my current friendships to an interesting spotlight. No longer will I be talking to people that don't give a shit about my feelings. Hell, I probably won't even be talking to the "close" friends I actually do have about my feelings. I'm just not seeing a logical reason to do it anymore.
I'm just tired of opening up to people who don't really give a shit. I'm done. I'm honestly done.